Just that really. I’ve namechangrd because this is very outing. Basically I’m separating from my stbexh, he is EA, lazy and a big man child. Because he had emotionally abused me for years, never helped me around the house or with the DCs. Never cared when I was ill or just given birth, still had to do everything. He couldn’t hold a job and would rather lay in bed all day play games on his phone then help out with the DCs/house. Because of all this, I have lost all respect and love for him. I’m exhausted.
2 years ago we went to see my mum, my family are very academic, we spoke about education and if I wanted to go back and study, what I wanted to study, how I would do it etc. Ex didn’t like this and he felt they were pressuring me into doing things, and he got angry started arguing with my family, then stormed off. He felt like “they were trying to change our lives”, 6 months ago I told him I wanted a divorce. Breaking point was when I was ill one day, and I begged him to help me with the DCs, he refused and lay there in bed watching YouTube videos, and I had to run around like a headless chicken trying to take care of the house and the kids.
Anyway now he’s going around telling his friends and family and everyone that wants to listen to him, that the reason why we’re separating is because of my family, my mum ruined our marriage because she encouraged me to go study/work.
When the reality is I’ve always wanted to work, but every time I find a job I like he will always find a reason why I can’t apply for that job. Even before we went to see my mum, I spoke to him about going back to uni and he said I wasn’t thinking of the children and I was being selfish. My DCs are primary school age btw.
I’m just upset that he’s telling everyone my mum is the reason why our marriage broke down, and not the fact that I’ve had enough of his abusive man child behaviour and doing everything on my own. I’ve realised over the years that he never wanted me to succeed in life, or have anything for myself. He just wants me to be a SAHM and just look after the children. It’s like he’s intimidated or something. I’ve always been very ambitious.
How should I deal with this? A part of me just gonna go and tell these people the real reason.
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What to do when Ex lies about you
44 replies
DreamsAndGoals · 12/06/2018 10:10
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