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AIBU?

To think she’s faking?

670 replies

Appleofmypie · 27/05/2018 14:34

One of my team at work is 14 weeks pregnant. She’s been off sick for 5 weeks with severe hyperemesis and still has a week left on her sick note (she’s being signed off for 2 weeks at a time)

By complete coincidence she is Facebook friends with a friend of mine.

My friend has put some pictures on Facebook this morning of her Greek holiday she’s still on, and my work colleague is in most of them - sunbathing, eating, swimming in the sea, playing volleyball. She has obviously blocked me as she is tagged in the pictures but her name is unclickable.

I’m gonna sound like a complete cow but I think she’s faking her sickness.
She’s on full pay from work and we’re having to pay an agency temp to cover her work too. It’s a small company that is struggling and I doubt we’re going to make any profit this month due to this.

My questions are:

Should I tell/show our boss?
What evidence of hyperemesis does a GP need to see to sign you off or Could it just be on her say so?
Is she actually doing anything illegal?
I know that pregnancy sickness is covered separately to normal in terms of disciplinary but if it’s proven she’s faking could it still be gross misconduct?

Thanks

OP posts:
lamerde · 27/05/2018 14:37

You’re going to get flamed on here OP.

However, I had terrible morning sickness and there is no way I could have gone on holiday or played volleyball. I wouldn’t have had the energy for either.

She may cope better with the constant nausea and vomiting but putting it on Facebook when you’re being paid to be physically incapable of doing your day job is silly.

Appleofmypie · 27/05/2018 14:43

I don’t really care about the flaming. My boss is worried sick as the business is really struggling, rates have gone up, rent has gone up, there’s major roadworks being done nearby so less people are coming in, and she’s paying 2 people to do one job. If she was truly unwell it’s understandable her being off but our jobs are unstable at the moment so if she’s lying about being sick so she can get extra paid leave then surely I’ve got a right to question it?

OP posts:
gamerchick · 27/05/2018 14:43

I think I would just comment that you're glad that x seems much better and are looking forward to seeing her back at work. Give her a chance to redeem herself if she really isn't as ill as she says.

redherring4 · 27/05/2018 14:44

I had sever sickness that got much better at the 13-14 week mark. It could well be that she is feeling much better and will be returning to work when her sick note expires.

It's exhausting being sick so much so if she is feeling better then I think a week or two to recharge isn't unreasonable.

gamerchick · 27/05/2018 14:44

Take screen shots first in case the photos are taken down.

redherring4 · 27/05/2018 14:44

Severe

SneakyGremlins · 27/05/2018 14:45

You need to take screenshots! Before the photos disappear.

Yippeeeeee · 27/05/2018 14:47

When she comes back to work ask her how Greece was in front of everyone.

IrmaFayLear · 27/05/2018 14:49

I had hyperemesis with dd. Getting on a flight? Volleyball? I couldn’t get out of bed without being sick. I went down to six and a half stone and had to have iron injections. This woman may have had morning sickness, but clearly a very mild case indeed of hyperemesis.

Teddybearonthewashingline · 27/05/2018 14:50

Can the company not claim.back sick pay costs? Is that a myth?

I don't know what evidence a Dr would need of puking etc.

RedForFilth · 27/05/2018 14:51

Take screenshots and show the boss. People doing things like this are a big part of the reason why sick pay is shit and women's pregnancy symptoms are doubted imo.
It's her own fault. And, When she comes back to work ask her how Greece was in front of everyone please do this!

bonnyshide · 27/05/2018 14:52

Yes, I'd screenshot everything and show your boss.

She is a liar, and by being this dishonest she is actually stealing from a small struggling business.

Thehop · 27/05/2018 14:53

Screenshot the pictures

I’m sorry but yes I’d show my boss

Though would love to see previous posters “how was Greece?” Question play out!

I’m sure you can’t go on holiday whilst claiming sick pay?

LolaLouise · 27/05/2018 14:53

Id show the boss. Especially given your job is at risk if they are struggling as a business.

Witchend · 27/05/2018 14:54

I think that what would irritate me is that it must have been planned. No way did she suddenly feel better a week ago and think "hey let's plan a holiday". Had she already booked these weeks off for a holiday?

I had bad morning sickness, not as bad as hyperemesis, but the only thing I managed quick movement for was running to the toilet to be sick. If I tried anything else it ended with running to the toilet...
So to me it does look like she is at best exaggerating.
People do have different views on how bad it is. I spoke to someone once and commented that I was on month #7 of morning sickness 24/7, being sick about 4+ times every day and she remarked "I know how you feel. I had the worst morning sickness ever. I felt so sick between 11and 12 every day that I had to lie down for that hour. It was odd because I didn't even feel sick the rest of the time. Thankfully it went by week 14".

Beyondourmeans · 27/05/2018 14:54

Did she book leave for this holiday in advance?

RhinoBlue · 27/05/2018 14:58

Hmm yeah. I had hyperemisis, I couldn't have got on a plane, I certainly couldn't have played volleyball even at my best.

I mean it's possible she had severe morning sickness which has now subsided. I understand that you might need a bit of time to fully recover before going back to work, but a beach holiday is taking it a bit far.

RebootYourEngine · 27/05/2018 15:00

This would annoy me.

Take screen shots and show your boss.

QuietNinjaTardis · 27/05/2018 15:00

I had hyperemesis. It was diagnosed when I ended up in hospital on a drip. I couldn’t move without vomiting. I have never felt so ill in my life it was awful. I missed a friends wedding as there’s no way I could have gone. I will say that it did magically clear up overnight at 14 weeks. It was so bizarre but just went away. So it’s possibel she’s feeling better. After 14 weeks you’d never have known I was that ill.

CherieBabySpliffUp · 27/05/2018 15:03

I agree, I would be screenshotting what I could and show the boss.

CornishMaid1 · 27/05/2018 15:03

Did she already have the holiday booked off before she went on sick leave?

When did you friend go?

If her sick note is only a week old I'd doubt she suddenly got better and booked a next day holiday abroad in the middle of two weeks sick leave. If she didn't have holiday leave already booked I would be very suspicious.

butidontwannausemyhead · 27/05/2018 15:03

Hmm. I think I would. If it was a big company and didn't affect my work I'd probably let it go, but someone taking the piss out of a small company is different.

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DarlingNikita · 27/05/2018 15:05

This is really difficult. Maybe she has had weeks of only being able to lie in bed/run to the loo, and now she's feeling better and is recharging before coming back to work.

Or she could be taking the piss.

I'd tread very carefully and wouldn't do anything like asking how her holiday was in front of everyone. I don't know if I'd tell the boss and I don't know if it's the case that you can’t go on holiday while claiming sick pay.
I think I'd want to do research/get some advice first.

ICouldBeSomebodyYouKnow · 27/05/2018 15:05

Might be worth posting this on the Employment Issues board, as several people with excellent knowledge of employment law often respond there.

PurpleTigerLove · 27/05/2018 15:05

Screen shots and talk to your boss . If she wants to go on her jollies she can take unpaid leave . My sister suffered terribly with hyperemesis, she weighed 61/2 stone at one point and was hospitalised several times . Sounds like she may have had bad morning sickness .

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