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To KNOW I was right in this argument

(30 Posts)
VogueVVague Sat 26-May-18 12:15:13

Me and dad (hes irish) were discussing the abortion referendum. He gets really irritated by my "feminist" stance a lot of the time.

Anyway in our debate, I said i thought it was shocking that the gay marriage vote (not life threatening) happened years before the abortion vote (life threatening).

I said i thought that this was because the gay marriage issue was about empowering more men, while abortion rights is about men losing control over their ability to police womens bodies.

He stormed out the room calling me a joke.

But im right, arent i?

Prawnofthepatriarchy Sat 26-May-18 14:15:57

Yes, you are. Self-ID for transgender also took priority over women's rights. It was legalized in 2015.

RandomWordsStuckTogether Sat 26-May-18 14:16:56

You are correct.

RandomWordsStuckTogether Sat 26-May-18 14:17:46

Although it wasn't just for gay men was it? Lesbians benefited too.

SecretStash Sat 26-May-18 14:17:55

Absolutely totally correct.

PositiveVibez Sat 26-May-18 14:22:57

Although it wasn't just for gay men was it? Lesbians benefited too

That's as maybe, but the OP is correct. That lebians benefitted is a consequence.

Lordamighty Sat 26-May-18 14:24:56

You are 100% correct.

VogueVVague Sat 26-May-18 14:25:11

Lesbians benefited and campaigned hard for it, but gay men were the primary driving force.

RJnomore1 Sat 26-May-18 14:27:58

Could not ageee more with you op.

3luckystars Sat 26-May-18 14:31:58

I don’t think there is any point in arguing about it at all as it doesn’t matter who is right as it’s all changed now.

So let’s all just appreciate the changes.

Fruitcorner123 Sat 26-May-18 14:34:46

* it doesn’t matter who is right as it’s all changed now*

it matters becuse it demonstrates that it's still a male dominated society we live in. It's not like everything is equal now and there's nothing left to fight for, the gender pay gap being the obvious example.

AsAProfessionalFekko Sat 26-May-18 14:37:08

An Irish colleague (male) commented yesterday that this vote would have happened (and been won) years ago if men got pregnant.

dogfish1 Sat 26-May-18 14:42:55

I don't think you're necessarily right. There are a lot of reforms in favour of women (e.g. suffrage, matrimonial property, rape within marriage, etc) that happened before gay marriage.
Some people, both male and female, believe that the unborn child has rights. In fact, almost everyone accepts this past a certain point (i.e. late in pregnancy) - even most feminists aren't arguing in favour of abortions at 8 months.
I'm pro choice but I don't think you can characterise this as a simple men's rights vs women's rights issue, or say that the only reason gay marriage happened first was because it involved men. And I don't really see the point in arguing this rather vague point to your dad. You'll never reach agreement or a conclusion, although he sounds like he has a temper problem if he then storms out of the room.

Mrsmadevans Sat 26-May-18 14:45:24

Definitely you are dead right OP

SemperIdem Sat 26-May-18 14:49:22

I was saying the exact same thing to my partner just last night! So naturally, I think you are right!

TheBogWitchIsBack Sat 26-May-18 14:55:51

You're right. Ireland has a history of not really giving a shit about it's women.

Vicky1990 Sat 26-May-18 14:58:53

So you managed to drag a man hating attitude into the conversation, no wander he was not happy.
Two different issues, not related.
You should apologise to your father for trying to make a feminist issue out of it.

VogueVVague Sat 26-May-18 14:59:41

Are you having a laugh?

Imchlibob Sat 26-May-18 15:02:45

Trying to make a feminist issue of women having the right to make decisions about their own bodies and health risks. Shocking. Tut tut. Back into the kitchen dearie.

IwantedtobeEmmaPeel Sat 26-May-18 15:03:57

Yes Op, you are right.

SemperIdem Sat 26-May-18 15:04:00

Vicky 😂😂😂😂


Lockheart Sat 26-May-18 15:04:21

*You should apologise to your father for trying to make a feminist issue out of it."

If men sitting in a church dictating the right of women to do as they wish with their bodies isn't a feminist issue, I don't know what is.

onalongsabbatical Sat 26-May-18 15:11:07

I think your analysis is bang on, OP. I presume your father's irritation at your feminism stems from his own acknowledged misogyny?

Glumglowworm Sat 26-May-18 15:12:41

I actually disagree

I think that abortion is a more emotive issue than gay marriage because for some opponents, abortion is murder (this is not my view btw). Whereas there are no “victims” with gay marriage

StrangeLookingParasite Sat 26-May-18 15:14:00

You should apologise to your father for trying to make a feminist issue out of it.

Light must bend around you.

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