My Dh has gone away and I’m finding that I don’t miss him as much as I probably should.
I like alone time anyway, I’m not someone who needs to be surrounded by people all the time. I do miss him in that it would be nice to have a little interaction. But it is nice to have chilled time, I can get on with doing things that I need to do, I am allowed to watch what I want on tv etc.
We have gone through a rough patch recently and I came very close to leaving him. He said some truly terrible things which I have forgiven but don’t know if I can forget. They really knocked my self-esteem. He also got very angry and whilst not violent to me he smashed some things in our house on a few occasions. He doesn’t normally drink too much but when he goes out he is always on a mission to get wasted and this brings out the more aggressive side in him. I now dread going out with him if there is alcohol involved, no amount of talking to him changes his behaviour. Does anyone else feel this way when their partner goes away? I do love him and I do miss him in some ways, I just wish he would put more effort into the relationship and respect my needs more. Then maybe I would miss him more I don’t know.
I am lucky to have a fantastic relationship now, but when hes away for a couple of days, I don't miss him, I just enjoy the time to myself. I'm always glad when he comes home though.
With my ex husband, when he went away for work, I was absolutely ecstatic as it meant no drunken arsehole in the house every single night, no drama, no verbal abuse, and no smashed furniture, and I didnt have to walk around on eggshells all the time. It made me realise I needed to get out. Which I did.
Thanks. I honestly don't know. I was so close to leaving him but when it came to it I just didn't feel that I could. We have the same arguments over and over again, he overreacts says nasty things and then I address it and he says it won't happen again. It always does. I feel resigned to it now.
Please don’t be resigned to it. Why should you put up with it? You only get one life. I wasted 13 years with my ex husband. I regret every single moment of it. But I am so much happier, relaxed, and enjoying life now I’m rid of him and in a relationship with someone who makes me feel safe and loved.
I feel safe and loved at times but not all the time. I don't know, I don't think I am brave enough to leave in all honesty. In my experience so far it seems like no relationship is perfect and if I left him another relationship would be just as bad but maybe in different ways.