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To ask what to do about this manspreading arse?

(108 Posts)
BastardGoDarkly Wed 23-May-18 13:26:55

Swimming classes, I don't know how but this bloke always ends up sat next to me.

My stomach drops every time he comes in.

He spreads himself out as much as possible, arms using his phone, and obviously legs together at ankles and knees as wide as they'll go.

I've got no room to move over, I hate it.

What do you do with manspreaders?

Oddish Wed 23-May-18 13:29:15

Womanspread right back, don’t move or make yourself small, just push back til the prick gets the message.

Racecardriver Wed 23-May-18 13:29:30

Sarcastic comment will usually do the trick. 'Your boss aren't that big, you really don't need so much room love.'

isthisspring Wed 23-May-18 13:30:02

A bag on the floor, ideally long and thin that can stand up by itself that you can use as a divider and a large hard book that you keep open on your lap. Or just say, "I need a bit more space".

CharlotteTheCharlatan2 Wed 23-May-18 13:30:19

I agree with womanspreading right back at him.

I do this on the train, it's hugely satisfying grin

JacquesHammer Wed 23-May-18 13:30:36

Tell him to stop

Rocinante1 Wed 23-May-18 13:32:32

Just tell him to move. Point out of him that his space ends at the edge of the chair and he's touching you, pushing against you and making you uncomfortable.

Do not be shy about it. Don't think you need to accept it. Just speak up. We all need to do that.

Bodear Wed 23-May-18 13:37:00

Just ask him to move up! I’ve done it a few times on the bus now and it’s not as scary as it seems. I tend to do a bit of a wriggle as if I’m trying to get comfy to see if they get the hint, then if not, gesture to the mid-point between the seats I.e. his boundary if you like, and say excuse me/ do you mind/ please could you move up a bit?
Say it with a smile and they always move! It’s so liberating!

allforequality Wed 23-May-18 13:42:33

Are you tiny? Maybe he thinks ‘oh lovely, I’ll sit there, lots of room to air my balls!!’. Or he fancies you?

I would get a large newspaper & sit with one ankle on my other knee with the newspaper spread wide, make sure you get there early & enjoy your woman-spreading! When he says ‘would you mind moving over’ then look him in the eyes hmm make that face & say ‘really?’

justilou1 Wed 23-May-18 14:31:44

Sharp accessories? Studded bags? Tell him to stop colonising your personal space or you will report him to management. Icky oaf!

TestingTestingWonTooFree Wed 23-May-18 14:33:17

Is swimming a typo?

BastardGoDarkly Wed 23-May-18 14:34:09

I've tried not moving, but his skin is clammy, and I feel really uncomfortable touching him confused

It's also a bench, so no definitive line.

Love the idea of scoffing that there's no way his balls are that big though grin

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy Wed 23-May-18 14:34:24

I don't understand why you don't just ask him to move over?

BastardGoDarkly Wed 23-May-18 14:34:49

No, kids swimming, we're watching.

AmazingPostVoices Wed 23-May-18 14:35:12

Can you move seats?

BastardGoDarkly Wed 23-May-18 14:35:41

Nor do I Green I seem to be finding it pathetically difficult.

BlueBug45 Wed 23-May-18 14:38:59

Ask him to move over.

If he doesn't get up and move seats.

If there are no seats get up and stand up.

Repeat this every single time he sits next to you.

Oddish Wed 23-May-18 14:40:13

If you don’t feel brave enough to directly say something, and I do get that, are you good at giving off ‘fuck You’ vibes? He’s only doing it because he’s been unchallenged on it his whole life, so he may not understand the reason behind the fuck you vibes but if you really truly can’t be direct then it’s probably the second best thing to do.

NotUmbongoUnchained Wed 23-May-18 14:41:00

Lick his arm. He’ll never sit next to you again

CharlotteTheCharlatan2 Wed 23-May-18 14:41:52

Get there just after him next week, plop yourself down next to him and with a big spread say "oh lovely, I’ll sit there, lots of room to air my balls!!" as per @allforequality suggestion

user7469322 Wed 23-May-18 14:43:35

^^This!! Do this!! 😂

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius Wed 23-May-18 14:43:42

Take a big bag with you, and put it on the seat so he can’t sit right next to you.

butlerswharf Wed 23-May-18 14:43:54

This happens to me all the time on the tube. When it happens I just jiggle my leg constantly but subtlely.

They initially look annoyed but then get annoyed that they can't be annoyed with me cos the only reason the jiggle is annoying them is because they're sat in my space!

Raven88 Wed 23-May-18 14:43:56

Tell him to give you room very loudly.

user7469322 Wed 23-May-18 14:43:57

Today 14:41 NotUmbongoUnchained

Lick his arm. He’ll never sit next to you again


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