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Is Fortnite ruining anyone else's family?

(237 Posts)
fortnitenightmare Tue 22-May-18 19:41:35

And devices in general?

We have 1 Xbox, 4 kids.

The older 2 bicker and argue about it constantly. They're like ogres when they can't go on it and ogres when they've been in it. And how very dare I interrupt a game with 'time's up!' Or 'dinner'. They're limited to 45 mins each, they have to take turns. They're addicted to it. Just one more...

It's ruining our family.

We:
Limit time spent on it
They have to earn time on it
Make them share
Warn them before stopping games

I have unpleasant children and it's really getting me down. They live for it. They're not allowed any other form of social media, and I get they they want to play/interact with their peers so I'd rather not ban it completely BUT we're running out of ideas of how to stop it ruining our family. I also hate the fact people can 'listen in' to our family life.

Have you got similar problems? How do you manage this addiction?

Sad 😞

Yogagirl123 Tue 22-May-18 19:44:48

Hand hold OP, my are passed the fortnite craze, but I felt exactly the same over Minecraft DS2 was TOTALLY obsessed! It will pass.

Alwayssearching Tue 22-May-18 19:45:59

Remove the x box for a week.. Worked here. Each time there was x box dramas it got removed again. DS is currently on a two week ban. The power lead is at dps works until then
It's been lovely he's been going out and playing football etc.. In the real world lol

Redcherries Tue 22-May-18 19:47:16

I have no idea what it is, guessing it’s aimed at children younger than mine, however I have seen so many thread titles similar to yours!

All these phases pass, give it time, and wine.

LalaLeona Tue 22-May-18 19:48:35

Have a friend who's 13 year old has basically stopped leaving the house because of it. Only goes to school then straight back to his room. She's thinking of turning off the Wi-Fi!

Couchpotato3 Tue 22-May-18 19:50:11

It's perfectly simple. Just remove the Xbox. Permanently.

RomeoBunny Tue 22-May-18 19:52:35

Kids dont need an xbox. Get shut. Watch your home life get 100x better.

Best idea? Just dont fucking get one in the first place. They're toxic. My DH's is now only for netflix and skygo when GOT is on and our kid isnt allowed anywhere near it.

optimuss Tue 22-May-18 19:52:44

the obsession is real! my cousin has had the exact same issue and she turned the wifi off for a week! removed the box and told them it wasn't working/was getting fixed. It does mean a detox for everyone though but it is nice!

Samesituation Tue 22-May-18 19:53:14

Same here OP I hate that fucking game. No advice I'm afraid could do with some myself - we seem to have a lot of problems with the Wi-Fi hmm. I hate that it appears to be another way for kids to bully each other which then gets taken into school and escalates further. I limit time already but with nice weather I'm doing it even further otherwise the kids wouldn't be out of the house.

purplelila2 Tue 22-May-18 19:53:36

Yessss!

My so called 'd'h and my 12 year old totally obsessed.

The H to the point where he doesn't realise he's being spoken to or want to do anything in the house except sit on his arse playing it all day.

When I was on maternity leave it was gears of war leave me with a crying toddler and a baby and sat on his arse . He works nights so there's me on my own at night and during the day.
It's no wonder I felt so miserable and still do .

Walkingdeadfangirl Tue 22-May-18 19:57:26

Siblings eh, either buy them an x-box each or don't buy them any at all. You will never teach them to share nicely until they are older.

pinkdelight Tue 22-May-18 19:58:26

"1 Xbox, 4 kids"

It was never going too go well.

We've got 1 PS4, 2 kids and thankfully the younger one isn't fussed for gaming. Otherwise am sure there'd be trouble. As it is, I'd heard that Fortnite caused addictive hell so held off on it for ages then only let DS have it on the condition he didn't succumb to addictive hell. He is of course hooked but daren't show any symptoms cos he knows it'll go immediately if he does. He gets 30mins every couple of evenings and a bit more at the weekends, and very very limited further spends on it. Basically I'm saying that even with one reasonably biddable kid it has to be micromanaged so with four all hooked and wanting it I'd think hell is largely unavoidable. So endure and bollock them as much as you can bear then if there's no improvement, take it away.

LiteraryDevil Tue 22-May-18 20:07:50

My 11 year old has asked for a PlayStation. She's been told when she's old enough to buy one herself with money she's earned then she can have one. An Xbox and my stbexh's addiction to it helped ruin our marriage. My son's dad's marriage ended because of his addiction to gaming. I won't allow it to ruin their lives too. They are allowed an hour a day on their tablets. They are 11 and 9. Thankfully they would rather be outside playing, drawing, or reading. Long may it last.

fortnitenightmare Tue 22-May-18 20:23:56

Only 2 play it and no, they won't be getting an Xbox each. How OTT.

We really do control/limit time on it and it is a real bargaining tool. BUT it's all they think about.

I would like to ban it completely, but it really is the only online 'social' thing they do. They're not allowed any social media and device time is really limited in our house. And as much as I don't want me or them to bow to peer pressure, I also don't want them to be excluded because they're not allowed it iykwim.

I am just at a loss as to how manage it/them as they really change. The eldest is vile to his brother- controlling his game time/getting his friends to stitch his brother up.

Walkingdeadfangirl Tue 22-May-18 20:28:36

BUT it's all they think about
And yet if it was football people would accept that. Its a phase.
If you cant afford 1 box each and wont remove it then you need to make sure they are never in the same room as each other when they are playing on it.

fortnitenightmare Tue 22-May-18 20:40:43

True.

I'm glad it's not just mine who change though (not that you're all struggling too, but that you feel my pain). They definitely won't get an Xbox each- that's just ott and far too indulgent.

I guess I've never seen my children change so much- it's like before/during/after playing they have personality transplants. Never had this before.

Mammalamb Tue 22-May-18 20:45:02

What is this Fortnite which seems to be causing problems for the mother’s of all adolescent boys??

fortnitenightmare Tue 22-May-18 20:50:08

An online game - a bit like Hunger Games (guns but no blood and gore) and you can play online with peers who can help you win battles or something. It's highly addictive, you get ranked, penalised if you leave a game and also get them 'just one more time' gambling feeling. Apparently.

waterrat Tue 22-May-18 20:53:29

It's not the same as a game of football obsession - playing football outside is much healthier and less likely to cause unpleasant rows and unpleasant behaviour.

OP you need to man/ woman up here - you say your kids behaviour changes - who is the grown up here? They are not aware of their behaviour so you hve to teach them what is not acceptable.

Take the fucking thing away and tell them their behaviour is disgusting and you won't allow it.

I feel so sad for kids that adults are not able to step in and create positive change - so what if it's their only social media? You are depressed and upset by what you see - get in there and make a change!

bridgetosomewhere Tue 22-May-18 20:54:39

Ds was obsessed with mine craft for a while and then roblox.
He only gets his iPad weekend mornings until we get up so he knows what his limits are.
Occasionally he has it in the car as well on a long journey.

If they both want to play minecraft I will allow it on the PlayStation after a long day playing out in the garden for example.

Strict limits seems to keep it in check. And if he is badly behaved or refuses to turn it off he loses it for the following weekend

BarbarianMum Tue 22-May-18 20:58:20

No in all honesty it hasnt. Helps that I only have 2 kids but when I gave them permission to download it I read them an internet piece about it being highly addictive and turning kids into arseholes and basically said at the first sign of addiction or arseholery I'd ban it. We also massively limit screen time which helps because ds2 gets very worked up if left playing (anything) for more than 90min.

Ploppymoodypants Tue 22-May-18 21:34:10

I don’t understand why people keep saying ‘oh if it was tennis or football etc no one would mind the obsession’. I thinks it dangerous to say that gaming is a healthy pastime like a sport.
My sister and I both had hobbies that were complete passions. We socialised and made real actual friends who we communicated with face to face not just via a game. So learning social skills. But my main point it we didn’t become obsessed to the point of trantruming at 12 years old because our hobby time was over. If the obsession was anything other than gaming then the behaviour would absolutely not be tolerated. (And for clarity we both now do jobs related to our childhood hobbies). There is something about gaming that is damaging to young people minds. The evidence is there from the hundreds of threads from parents at the end of their thether over the behaviour of their teens and gaming. I could be wrong, but in all my time on here I have never seen a thread saying ‘oh my teenage daughter is obsessed with her pony and her behaviour around it is uncontrollable’ or ‘my teenage boy is so obsessed with rugby, his violent rages over it are ruining all our family life’.

mooncuplanding Tue 22-May-18 21:37:43

Both obsessed

Both turn into dicks

Both are never seen only heard

altiara Tue 22-May-18 21:40:27

Yes! Just one more game, can I buy VBucks.... NO!!!
I now seem to have 1 sided conversations with the air before starting shouting in the hope that making noise may register.
To be fair, he’s also like this with football/table tennis in the garden but then I have to play too.

aquashiv Tue 22-May-18 21:42:16

No we don't have it.
A PS4 nearly did us in. They have moved on from that now but I'll not buy any thing else. They are into sports thank fully.

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