AIBU to have a small (6th) birthday party?

[PenelopeChipShop]

I’m planning DS’s 6th birthday. He’s a fairly quiet and shy child (like his mum!) but does get on well with the very few friends he plays with. He loves a certain sport and the local sports centre does a party where they get to do this for an hour, then you get a party room for tea and cake etc. The maximum number of kids is 15.

Tbh this would be the perfect party for him as he doesn’t want the whole class in a massive hall, but he does want a ‘party’. His list of friends that he actually wants there is only six - three from school, three from out of school! I could bump this up a bit by inviting kids of my friends that he sort of knows but isn’t really bothered about. But I darent send out invites to the whole class as we’d probably end up with more than 15.

It’s not bad to just invite three friends from school is it?? It seems to be the norm to have huge whole class parties in either soft play or a hall among his year but he doesn’t want that. Surely it’s ok to just have a small party for the people he actually wants to play with...? Haven’t experienced a similar ‘small’ one so not sure!

[Caribou58]

You do what's right for your child. It's his party, you're his Mum and only you should make the decision about this - which means what others think about it is the least important issue.

[User467]

It's absolutely fine, you just can't ask the teacher to hand them out. We often just invite a few and I either contact their parents directly if I know them or now DS is old enough I just get him to give the invites out at break/after school

[PenelopeChipShop]

Ah thank you User467, hadn’t thought of that. Yes will make sure I just hand them out myself. It just feels like i’m doing something unusual as so far all the parties have been such huge affairs. Personally I would love it if it was just 7 of them!

[Closetlibrarian]

Perfectly fine!
We just did a ‘big’ all-class party for DC’s 5th and while it was fun it was also mayhem, so we decided from next year we’re going to do the ‘guests same as age’ (ie 6 guests for 6th, etc).

I think it’s pretty normal, tbh

[Cath2907]

Totally normal. We normally let DD choose who to invite. It is usually 3 or 4 from her class + 1 of thems sister who she likes, her cousins and a family friend. We've never managed more than 10 kids total. Much better that way.

[Hoosh]

We've had small parties (6-8 kids in total) for DD's last three birthdays (she's 8). It's been great, and the guests all said they had a brilliant time. For me it was low-stress and I got to see DD really enjoying the time with her friends.

[livingthegoodlife]

my 6 year old only had 5 kids at his party this year, was lovely! have a lovely time and do whats right for you.

[PenelopeChipShop]

Right when he heard he can have 15 he picked 11 from his class (of 27) and three friends from out of school. Do you reckon that’s still ok or is it ‘ leaving out’ too many school friends?

[RicStar]

Sounds absolutely fine - dd had exactly the same for her 6th 14 guests 11 from her class plus 3 others. Most parties she has been to have had that sort of number.

[PenelopeChipShop]

Cool thank you, I probably shouldn’t worry but I already feel like some of the mums don’t like me, I don’t want to do something horrible. But at the same time I feel parties should be what the dc wants, not who the parents feel they ‘should’ invite tbh!