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AIBU?

To want an answer to the question I asked?

22 replies

imtired2 · 21/05/2018 21:18

It may be PMT but I may scream if I ask DH one more question and he answer it with a comment that doesn't actually answer the question Angry

Past few are

Me 'do you have a plan B if that doesn't work'
DH 'it will be fine'

Me 'how many t shirts have you packed for holiday?'
DH 'we are going for 8 days'

Me 'Did you speak to your Dad'
DH 'Why didn't you remind me when you called before I would have gone to see him on my way home'

FFS I'm not your PA and just answer the question asked!!

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GreenTulips · 21/05/2018 21:19

Yep same here!

Drives me crackers

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ElderflowerWaterIsDelish · 21/05/2018 21:23

Wow judging by the examples you gave you are getting so worked up over little stuff...maybe he won't give an answer as he's afraid of what your reaction will be if the answer isn't the answer you want to hearConfused

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confusedlittleone · 21/05/2018 21:46

He kinda has answered them though.. the first and last ones are him saying no just without saying no.

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AmIRightOrAMeringue · 21/05/2018 21:49

I get the same - me: what time do you want to leave tomorrow? Him: not too late.

So non specific may as well not have answered. Infuriating!!

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Glumglowworm · 21/05/2018 21:50

Well the first and last are clearly “no”...

But I get constantly frustrated by people who answer an either/or question with yes... ok but yes what you idiot! So I do sympathise.

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imtired2 · 21/05/2018 22:23

Elderflower
My actual reposes
That's a no then Hmm
So you packed 8 or did you take a spare?
I asked you when I remembered its not my fault you forgot

I'm not a monster he is afraid to answer Blush and yes I know I'm getting annoyed over little things but little things are annoying!

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Ennirem · 21/05/2018 22:40

Erm on the face of it none of the questions needed asking in the first place (assuming it's his plan, his t-shirts and his dad). If you're not his PA why are you trying to organise him?

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MissingMo · 21/05/2018 22:43

My partner is the same.
Me: What do you want for dinner?
DP: We had stir fry last night.
It doesn't answer the question at all. I get frustrated at him and he doesn't understand why I get frustrated.

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FrangipaniBlue · 21/05/2018 23:03

OP I think we may be married to the same man.......,, Grin

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User467 · 21/05/2018 23:05

Hahahaha....yes! This is so annoying. I get the "it'll be fine" response a lot and it drives me insane!

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MrsTerryPratchett · 21/05/2018 23:08

It's passive resistance to your micro management. Who cares how many shirts he's packed? I've never asked DH that question once and we go away a lot.

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ChishandFips33 · 21/05/2018 23:10

Yep got another one here. Drives me fecking nuts!

Standard answer now is 'that's not what I asked' through gritted teeth

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Biggreygoose · 21/05/2018 23:12

How many of those questions need to be asked?

Can he be trusted to adult by himself?

(Think @MrsTerryPratchet probably has it)

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SandyY2K · 21/05/2018 23:15

Me 'how many t shirts have you packed for holiday?'
DH 'we are going for 8 days'

Why do you see the need to ask this? Isn't he old enough to pack what he needs?

I don't even ask my teenagers that either.... because they can pack enough for the duration.

The answer to the other questions was No. He thinks his plan is fine and hasn't thought of it doesn't think a back up is required.

He could have also said "we'll cross that bridge when we come to it"

He might have thought you were being pessimistic by asking.

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imtired2 · 22/05/2018 07:39

I guess I gave you questions out of context but imo they need to be asked

A) the result of plan A not working means I would need to sort out the issue while DH is in another country and we had just been discussing the plan DH had sorted possible falling through so. Do you have a plan B was a valid question - no he doesn't so I will have to think of a plan if it does fall through. Fingers crossed it doesn't.

B) when packing DH said he wasn't sure if he had enough t-shirts ironed to pack. I was getting the iron out so asked how many he had packed as while ironing my stuff in would iron him an t shirt to pack and save him a job.

C) his dad has been unwell so I was just asking if he had spoke to him to see how he was.

I don't think any of those questions where micro managing but maybe IABU asking questions Hmm

Thanks for those who see how annoying it can be. Glad to know he not the only one Blush

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Ennirem · 22/05/2018 11:27

Ok so with context slightly more pointful... But... Do people iron t-shirts??? Blush

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imtired2 · 22/05/2018 13:32

Yes people really iron t shits, although DH is the only one in our house who has t shirts ironed. I iron the clothes that need to be ironed shirts and some dresses of Mine and DDs.

Not sure how that's relevant but there you go.

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Ennirem · 22/05/2018 14:26

I'll add that to the long list of "household jobs I fail to do" then Grin sorry for being snippy earlier, god knows we're all driven mad by our OHs one way or another!

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Whatshallidonowpeople · 22/05/2018 16:19

This ridiculous having to give an exact answer to a question because people can't extrapolate the info they are give drives me bonkers. My exP used to do it. He's ask for example, is this t shirt yours? I'd say, I don't shop in x shop and he'd say that doesn't answer the question. I'd have to then say no, because I don't shop there. Work the answer out for yourself!

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BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 22/05/2018 16:26

My DP does it on purpose because he knows it drives me mental...

'What time is it?'
Same time it was yesterday.

'What do you want for dinner?'
Food.

Grrrrrrrr...

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Firesuit · 22/05/2018 17:27

He's ask for example, is this t shirt yours? I'd say, I don't shop in x shop and he'd say that doesn't answer the question. I'd have to then say no, because I don't shop there. Work the answer out for yourself!

"I don't shop in X shop" doesn't answer the question. It only answers the question if:-
(a) he knows the shirt is from X shop
(b) the shirt has to have been bought by you (can't have been a gift or left there by someone else)
(c) you would never buy a shirt for anyone other than yourself

You might know those facts, but he may not. The frustration-causing stupidity in not answering the actual question asked lies in assuming that everyone's heads contain the same set of relevant facts.

You could have given a one-word answer that would have settled the matter with absolute finality, instead you gave a multi-word answer that requires him to either make possibly wrong assumptions or ask follow-up questions.

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Firesuit · 22/05/2018 17:31

Even if he works it out, he's had to expend mental effort to do so, and go without certainty, all because for some reason you can't give a straight yes or no.

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