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AIBU?

To think that most women with EDs

12 replies

Okaaaaay · 21/05/2018 12:53

haven’t suffered childhood sexual abuse.

As in AIBU to disagree with an assertion that they have.

A good friend is a social worker and blithely states that everyone with anorexia/bulimia was abused as a child.

She knows I’ve suffered with an ed.

I’ve never been abused (that I know of).

Curious - is this what most people think about the issue? Or is my friend being presumptive?

OP posts:
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DuchyDuke · 21/05/2018 12:56

Abuse isn’t just sexual it can be physical and verbal too, and it’s not just from parents but could comprise of bullying not just when they are children but as young adults too. So by that logic yes most women with ED have been abused

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Okaaaaay · 21/05/2018 12:59

Sorry, my friend specified sexual abuse I didn’t make that clear.

OP posts:
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Justwaitingforaline · 21/05/2018 13:04

I suffered with anorexia/bulimia in my early to mid teens - I was bullied horribly at secondary school and it definitely triggered the onset of my ED

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MysweetAudrina · 21/05/2018 13:04

I know of a few people who suffer from eds no abuse of any sort, present or past, in their lives.

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Eatsleepworkrepeat · 21/05/2018 13:09

I think you're right. As a social worker though, it's easy for her frame of reference to be skewed, as so many people she works with will have been abused. Totally tactless to say it to you!

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ImCatbug · 21/05/2018 13:10

I’ve had/have an ED and was never abused as a child in any sense.

Mental health issues are so complex and it’s ridiculous to make sweeping statements like that because every person is different.

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Bluntness100 · 21/05/2018 13:11

I know two people with eating disorders. I would bet a years salary neither of them were sexually abused.

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PerryPerryThePlatypus · 21/05/2018 13:20

There's a school of thought that links undiagnosed ASD in girls and women with eating disorders. It's not too vastly researched though.

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21stcentury · 21/05/2018 13:26

There is a massive evidence base that Anorexia is a genetically based illness which can be triggered by environmental factors. The trigger can be as little as the first time a young person goes on diet. Because of this research they way the treat eating disorders has change dramatically in the last 15 years and outcomes are much better. Families are seen best places to help recovery (the treatment is called Family Based Therapy). I have lots of resources that I am happy to share to reeducate her.

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ProzacAndWine · 21/05/2018 13:26

I agree with you OP. That's a sweeping generalisation. It's probably mroe true the other way around (in that many women - but not all - who have been abused will, among other issues, develop eating disorders to some extent), but there are no absolutes either way.

I'd urge people not to make assumptions like "I know X amount of people with ED and bet they've not been abused", though. Really, unless you're their close confidant in all things their mental health, how would you know? Childhood abuse is mostly very invisible, you can't often tell, even if you know you know the circumstances very well.

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ProzacAndWine · 21/05/2018 13:27

even if you THINK you know the circumstances very well

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CanIhavedessertfirst · 21/05/2018 16:58

I've had an ED and never suffered sexual abuse, I did however have an abusive mum and was eventually taken off her. Fast forward to my early twenties and I ended up in an abusive relationship. I don't think it's true of all ED sufferers, but for me it has always been a way of coping and focussing on something other than what is going on in my life. Even now, when I'm upset, my first thought is I need to diet, but I'm aware enough of that to not relapse.

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