Talk

Advanced search

To be pissed office by my friends double standards

(26 Posts)
Cheeseplease73 Wed 16-May-18 18:54:40

Very good friend knows that’s me & DP having loads of problems as talked to her about it in detail. Assumed that she’d keep it private but she didn’t and told her partner plus another friend.
Last week she told me that her & partner are doing ivf. As it goes I hadn’t said anything to anyone but 3 days later (and after clearly talking to her partner) sends me a ‘reminder’ text to say that her business is strictly private.
Aibu to feel pissed off by her text- she blabbed about my relationship to 2 other people but I am send reminders about her business.
It’s the tone of the text has upset me more than anything.

starsandstuff Wed 16-May-18 18:57:00

YANBU that would piss me off. Reply "Of COURSE I wouldn't say anything! What sort of a shitty friend talks about people's private business??"

Aprilmightbemynewname Wed 16-May-18 18:57:13

Reply back that their are 2 sorts of friends, one of the keep the gob shut type and the other blabber mouths. You are the quiet friend.

Cheeseplease73 Wed 16-May-18 18:57:44

That’s pissed OFF in my title and no pissed office grin Bloody autocorrect!!!

AnduinsGirl Wed 16-May-18 18:57:45

That is shit. And MN really opened my eyes to this kind of thing recently. I assumed when people tell their best mate a secret and make clear it's not to go any further, that it won't go any further. But many on here seem to think it's ok for the mate to tell their partner. It's really not.

ConciseandNice Wed 16-May-18 18:59:42

YANBU. It’s horrible. I don’t think she was thinking, but just to make sure, reply with one of the excellent replies above^

Queenoftheblitz Wed 16-May-18 19:01:41

Op did you tell her it was in strictest confidence? Sometimes you have to spell it out to people, which is what she's done.

Cheeseplease73 Wed 16-May-18 19:09:44

I feel like texting to say ‘it’s a shame you didn’t show me the same courtesy’ but I won’t!!

Fishface77 Wed 16-May-18 19:10:34

Why won’t you?
I would

AsAProfessionalFekko Wed 16-May-18 19:13:25

'I'd better cancel the full page notice in the daily mail then'

Princess9891 Wed 16-May-18 19:15:13

I'd literally text everyone in my phone but then again I'm a massive bitch

Branleuse Wed 16-May-18 19:21:20

Say "of course, id never gossip about my friends personal problems they tell me in confidence. By the way, how come you told your boyfriend and Susan about my relationship issues?

Cheeseplease73 Wed 16-May-18 19:26:59

@princess9891 grin I am tempted!! It’s the assumption that her life is more private (and thus important) than mine that’s irritated me I think.

Goodasgoldilox Wed 16-May-18 19:28:59

I'd reply - 'No need to worry - I'll stay just as quiet about it as you always do with my private issues!'

YearOfYouRemember Wed 16-May-18 19:29:41

Then tell her. She's not your boss. She has no control over you. You can put her straight on her behaviour without blabbing about her business.

PurpleDaisies Wed 16-May-18 19:31:10

Maybe she’s told someone else and they’ve been indiscreet. Some people might not get that someone else’s IVF isn’t something to share.

Tone is sometimes hard in texts etc. It sounds like she isn’t that great a friend anyway though.

ConciseandNice Wed 16-May-18 19:33:19

I am tempted!! It’s the assumption that her life is more private (and thus important) than mine that’s irritated me I think.

That’s exactly what she’s saying. Please send her a reply that shows how rude this is.

Dobby1sAFreeElf Wed 16-May-18 19:35:48

I'd assume strictly private includes the 2 people she blabbed to

AdoraBell Wed 16-May-18 19:38:35

I would text back and say -

Yes, of course. The same level of privacy afforded to the info I trusted her with. Best of luck with your ivf.

Juells Wed 16-May-18 19:41:09

@Princess9891

I'd literally text everyone in my phone but then again I'm a massive bitch

I admire those who own their bitchiness 🤣

I have no advice to offer, I'm afraid. I might be inclined to get a little dig in though.

Mummyoflittledragon Wed 16-May-18 19:56:59

“I won’t speak about your private business to others. Would be if you could do the same for me the next time we discuss mine.” That way you’re not attacking her. And you can see what she responds.

Mummyoflittledragon Wed 16-May-18 19:57:42

Oops would be great if you could ....

SmellsLikeMiddleAgeSpirit Wed 16-May-18 20:06:04

I'd reply - 'No need to worry - I'll stay just as quiet about it as you always do with my private issues!'

This ^ wink

Juells Wed 16-May-18 20:06:37

Virtuous passive aggressive....

"I'd no more dream of talking about your private business than you'd dream of talking about mine"

SweetCheeks1980 Wed 16-May-18 20:11:31

I tell my partner any of my friend's gossip 🙄

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: