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AIBU to ask if you can swim, and if you can't, can your DC?

(84 Posts)
AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered Thu 26-Apr-18 15:12:43

An acquaintance from toddler group has said that she can't swim, is afraid of water, and so won't be teaching her DC or taking them to lessons as she'd hate to be badgered to take them swimming. She's a LP and her DC's father isn't in the picture so he can't take them. Clearly it's very sad that she's scared of water, but I can't help but think that it's a bit crap not to ensure someone (i.e. a swimming teacher) teaches your DC a fundamental life skill that could save their life (not to mention give them enjoyment and enable them to take part in pool parties and the like when older).

When we learned at school I remember there only being 2 kids who couldn't swim, and they were incredibly embarrassed to be relegated to the baby pool whilst the rest of us swam in the main pool. I'd hate DS to go through that.

Obviously I'd never say anything to the other mum, it's none of my business what she chooses to teach or not teach her DC, but am I being unreasonable to think she's got this wrong and that everyone should make sure their DC can swim (bar those who can't due to SEN obviously).

And before anyone asks why I'm starting a thread about it despite it not being my business: this is AIBU. Most of it wouldn't exist were it not for us all silently judging random strangers!

halcyondays Thu 26-Apr-18 15:14:26

When my dd1 started swimming lessons at school, about half of them couldn't swim at all but they nearly all could by the end of primary.

GorgeousJaws Thu 26-Apr-18 15:15:24

I can't, but I made sure my daughter could swim like a fish by the time she was 7.

I really need to go to lessons myself.

ILikeMyChickenFried Thu 26-Apr-18 15:15:29

I can swim just about enough to not drown, ie I can do multiple lengths breast stroke but nothing else.

Teaching children to swim is an important life skill, it's virtually impossible to find a teacher around here though, they're so in demand!

Osirus Thu 26-Apr-18 15:15:57

I can’t swim and am terrified of it, but I do take my toddler swimming, on my own and with DH, and will encourage her to learn.

I didn’t go into a pool until I was about 7, I was never taken as a child. By that time, it terrified me.

patstar Thu 26-Apr-18 15:16:27

She shouldn't transfer her fear onto her children. Being able to swim is a vital skill for life.
My husband taught all three of our boys to swim

Osirus Thu 26-Apr-18 15:16:50

Taken as a younger child, that should say. I was still a child at 7!

AnneProtheroe Thu 26-Apr-18 15:17:00

No, I can't swim. I made it a priority to get my DD swimming lessons because of this. She's now a lifeguard. <proud>

Katedotness1963 Thu 26-Apr-18 15:20:18

I can't. I made sure my boys were in the pool as soon as possible. They went with their dad.

LittleOwl153 Thu 26-Apr-18 15:22:34

When my Yr 3 daughter did her (2 terms only so 20 lessons) with her primary school only 5 out of 30 were good enough swimmers to be in the bug pool. I would have though their parents should be embarrassed by this.

I appreciate lessons cost money - but I think it is an essential skill.
(I can swim well as can my 8yr old. 4yr old is learning. My mum can't and I can see the effect of this even walking along a canal path she is scared!)

mittensofsteel Thu 26-Apr-18 15:23:48

I can swim and my children can too.

On the other hand I couldn’t ride a bike so felt it was really important that my children learnt how to - I was always really sad I couldn’t. I did finally learn though at the age of 40! Goes to show it’s never too late!

BarbaraofSevillle Thu 26-Apr-18 15:24:01

My DM can't swim but it was something she thought that it was very important that we all learnt, so we all had swimming lessons, went with school and even swum at club level.

Made for some fun and games when various swimming pools wouldn't let me supervise my little brother when I was 8/10 and could swim hundreds of metres and he about 3, but they were perfectly happy for non swimming DM to take him grin.

Treaclepie19 Thu 26-Apr-18 15:24:10

I can't. My son will learn, I'm going to get him lessons and his Dad will take him on the weekends.

HorseOutside Thu 26-Apr-18 15:24:24

I can swim OK. DH is a very good swimmer. Because of where we live, close to open water, we made it a priority for our DC to learn to swim.

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered Thu 26-Apr-18 15:24:24

Those of you who can't swim - why have/will you not learn? Is it fear?

littlepeas Thu 26-Apr-18 15:25:22

I can swim but I didn’t start learning until I went swimming with school - I was about 8. My mum can’t swim and hates swimming. I think she has done me a huge disservice - although I can swim reasonably well in terms of stamina my technique is crap and I have poor water confidence (don’t put my face in). My 3 dc all started learning at age 2 and are confident, strong swimmers.

FilthyforFirth Thu 26-Apr-18 15:26:04

I cant swim, nearly drowned as a child, petrified of the water. Desperate my son isn't the same so has been having lessons since 3 months old, he is now 9.5 months. YANBU.

Givemethebiggestslice Thu 26-Apr-18 15:26:13

Wow not being rude but I assumed pretty much everyone could swim (unless there is a medical reason why not etc). Didn’t everyone get taught at school?!

I’m not a great swimmer and never go swimming but if you threw me in a pool I could do a few lengths of breast stroke / back stroke.

DH is a great swimmer, does open water swimming etc.

I’ve already pre-registered our baby for swimming and it’s not even born yet grin

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered Thu 26-Apr-18 15:27:10

Bloody well done mittens - learning to ride a bike at 40 must be MUCH harder than learning as a child, hats helmets off to you! grin

Pompom42 Thu 26-Apr-18 15:28:02

I can swim a bit but terrified of water after nearly drowning twice as a child.
My eldest went to swimming lessons for almost 2 years, is a good swimmer and isn't afraid of the water

GorgeousJaws Thu 26-Apr-18 15:28:38

My fear comes from my sister almost drowning in the pool on holiday when we were children, I've hated going in ever since.

Incidentally, my sister who almost drowned would probably give Rebecca Adlington a run for her money in the pool now.

TheIsland Thu 26-Apr-18 15:29:32

I didn’t learn till I was about 16. I’m a very poor swimmer but managed to teach two children!

FilthyforFirth Thu 26-Apr-18 15:32:07

@givemethebiggestslice I always got out of it because I was so scared. It is somethig I will try to rectify when I have the time, but my focus right now is my son learning!

Imsosceptical Thu 26-Apr-18 15:32:44

I was taught to swim along with my siblings at an early age after my parents found themselves on a sinking pedalo in Spain in the 70’s with 3 toddlers and having to decide which 2 or the 3 they could realistically save!!! Obviously all ended well and bring 70’s not too many health and safety refs then! But on arriving home we were immediately signed up for swimming lessons which we loved. Swimming is like riding a bike, once you can swim you never forget and it can save your life, I love swimming and signed DD up from 10 weeks old, she’s a fish and cannot remember ever not knowing how to swim, having moved to OZ. It’s a blessing as everyone has a pool and the ocean is minutes away.

DuchyDuke Thu 26-Apr-18 15:34:10

Mum can’t swim. I learned the basics in primary then dad took us all out so I could teach the rest of my siblings. We only started swimming lessons after that.

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