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For being bitterly disappointed at the language and attitudes of people on MN lately?

(419 Posts)
CS1753 Mon 14-May-07 14:02:08

I started using MN for support when I was going through hard times, hopefully supporting people when they were going through their hard times, learn new things, catch up with news etc. Lately however every thread I go on seems to be one big fight session. People are either being purposefully nasty or having a go at anyone who disagrees with their opinion - foul language included in the bundle. Is this really what this site is turning in to? Surely everyone is entitled to an opinion and surely if you don't agree and can't be mature about you should follow my mother's advice 'if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all'.

Bambiraptor Mon 14-May-07 14:06:20

I love 'heated debates'. It is what appeals to me about MN. You shouldn't take it so personally.

Rachmumoftwo Mon 14-May-07 14:07:02

This is going to set some people off I'm sure. I agree totally. A while ago someone started a thread saying that MN was poo and so were a lot of posters (not exact quote). I posted to say I had not found that to be the case but since then have been appalled at the nastiness and judgemental attitudes of some posters. I am all for free speech but most of the time it is not even constructive criticism, just plain bitchiness.

ginnedupmummy Mon 14-May-07 14:08:43

Message withdrawn

lissielou Mon 14-May-07 14:10:34

i try to avoid the ones that look like they are going to kick off. i think we've had a lot of trolls recently as well as namechanging which has resulted in some nastiness

Kathyis6incheshigh Mon 14-May-07 14:10:58

Hasn't there always been swearing on MN - surely that's not new?

As for 'if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all', I would hate the way MN would become if everyone thought like that!

foxybrown Mon 14-May-07 14:11:41

I agree with the OP. I've seen some amazing support for people on MN and when its at its best its fantastic, but there are times when its nothing more than a bitch-fest, with people having a go at the most inconsequential thing or just being unkind.

We should all mind our manners and be a little kinder IMHO!

LittleMouseWithCLogsOn Mon 14-May-07 14:11:59

oh god here we go

LieselVentouse Mon 14-May-07 14:12:16

Its not even like the newbies coming on and starting fights it seems to be newbies coming on and asking a question and then the oldies coming on and saying stuff like parp and fark off

LittleMouseWithCLogsOn Mon 14-May-07 14:12:23

have oyu changed your name for htis by any chance

ground hog

LittleMouseWithCLogsOn Mon 14-May-07 14:12:41

parp and fark orf

2shoeswhoismshadowsnumber1fan Mon 14-May-07 14:13:01


FrannyandZooey Mon 14-May-07 14:13:30

yes this really IS a parp

ScottishMummy Mon 14-May-07 14:13:36

i avoid eg dont read or contribute to certain threads namely

SAHM Vs Working mum
Breast Vs Bottle Feeding
Private Schooling Vs State

largely because when i have looked at any of above topics they quickly descend into lots of faces and cross exchanges, spurious arguemnts and too much upset

i use MN for info/chat/support/laugh/pass time so not interested in heated debates or slnging match.

IMO, In real life people would not be so rude/heated/judgemental/ and such topics would barely be touched on for fear of offending someone - but internet offers anonnimity and so people can be and frequently are inflammatory also a pack mentality can arise and everyone can collectively whip each other up

mummydoit Mon 14-May-07 14:13:44

I agree with the OP. I've been a MN lurker for a long time but have only recently dared to start posting as I'm always a little afraid of what reactions I might get. I still haven't dared to post on a heated discussion. I think the nastiness is very off-putting to newbies.

LittleMouseWithCLogsOn Mon 14-May-07 14:14:10


CS1753 Mon 14-May-07 14:14:41

Kathy - I didn't mean literally - sorry should have been clearer. I just meant that there are ways to put a point across without being nasty and making personal attacks on people.

Thanks Gin - I will keep perservering as I really did like the site when I first started using it.

FrannyandZooey Mon 14-May-07 14:14:58

Why would you lurk for a long time and then post on a site that you think is nasty and scary? This is not a rhetorical question.

LittleMouseWithCLogsOn Mon 14-May-07 14:15:06

oh god
do you not htink its rude to come into a foruma nd slag it off

ConnieDescending Mon 14-May-07 14:15:35

MN can be shit, I agree.

NKF Mon 14-May-07 14:16:27

People come on for different reasons surely. Some people are seeking support, some want a debate, others should be getting on with their work....

LieselVentouse Mon 14-May-07 14:16:51

Agree Cod

GameGirly Mon 14-May-07 14:17:05

Thing is, though, it's not Real Life, is it? So some people get brave and possibly cowardly and say exactly what they think whereas they might in RL try to express themselves more tactfully. And I can't help thinking that those who are hurt by virtual comments, are perhaps taking it all too seriously and should stick to RL.
(Damn, have not really said what I'm trying to say!)

2shoeswhoismshadowsnumber1fan Mon 14-May-07 14:17:18

mn is wonderful

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House Mon 14-May-07 14:20:38

mn is wonderful and although there can be bitchiness i dont see that any more than there can be in RL really, but i tend to avoid most controversial threads anyway!

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