Hello, I've name changed for this but have posted a few times before.
I've had a tough year - one of my parents died last month, and the other is expected to pass away any time - could be days or possibly months. I work 25 hours a week, have twin DCs aged 10, and I visit my Mum 5 times a week in the hospice.
I'm giving this background to explain, and I'm willing to admit my judgement is well off at the mo, so if IABU I'll accept your better judgement.
We are comfortable financially in that ends meet with some treats, but far from well off (car 10+ years old and holidays are usually camping). We decided to employ a cleaner although it's a luxury borne out of necessity. Until last month when he died I was heavily involved in my Dad's day to day life to support him. We had one cleaner and she was amazing - in 2 hours she did vacuuming, cleaned kitchen (moving everything) and bathroom. 4 bed house. No dusting or anything else but that was fine. But she left for a career change.
I asked for recommendations to replace her on Facebook and a friend of a friend offered to clean - she already had another cleaning job. She does 2.5 hours a week for me, plus 2 hours once a fortnight at my parents (which doesn't need much as it's empty awaiting sale). We pay her £12 an hour and round here average is £10-£12 an hour, so is fair I think. Each week she writes down her hours and I leave money out - more than will cover it and we just carry forward a credit. We did it this way because I said if she needed to do less or more any week it was up to her, and I'd pay per hour. The following are the issues I've got:
- We recently invested in a video doorbell. As a result I've discovered by chance that although she always writes down 2 hours 30 minutes, in fact she usually does 2 hours 10 or 15 mins. Not much but each week I'm paying for 15-20 mins she's not doing. I assume the same applies at my parents because the one time I was in and out while she cleaned, she left after 1 hour 40 but I just assumed she made it up other weeks (though in six weeks I've kept an eye on timings it's always short). She doesn't seem to try to hide it - if I'm about she still does it. I just hadn't realised until I saw the timings on the doorbell app.
- This would all be ok if we'd agreed a per job rate but we didn't - it was always hourly and she writes it down. It would also be ok if my house was as clean as when the last cleaner did it, but it's a fair way off that. This lady moves nothing, so when I moved the knife block recently I found weeks worth of crumbs etc behind it. Ditto food mixer, bread bin, etc. She dusts a little but it's just a flick with a feather duster - no polish or damp wiping, so that accounts for the extra half hour compared to previous cleaner though the rest of the cleaning she does less than the previous lady.
- She brings down 2 bins from upstairs bedroom and bathroom, and flings it all in to a large recycling box I have, along with various used jeyes cloths, paper towels and wipes she's used. I've pointed out that most this stuff isn't recyclable and she just says she knows that and that she puts it in there for me to sort. Which means it's mixed in with all the stuff already in the recycling bin and I end up rooting through taking out wipes etc that she's cleaned the loo with, and sorting the contents of 2 bins. I try to do this before she comes now to avoid the big sort, but she still flings the wipes, cloths, paper towels among the recycling.
- When I popped in at my parents with the DC to give her a new key, she made a big point of telling the 3 of us that someone had left an unflushable poo in the toilet and it had taken her 4 goes to get rid. It was one of my DC I'm sure (who were horrified) but none of us realised it was there. We flush with lid down and I guess they didn't check. My cousin stayed at the house after my dad's funeral and the cleaning lady asked me afterwards to tell her next time to rinse her pubes down the plug hole. Mortifying and not nice but I didn't know they were there. I then found myself rinsing a few hairs away when the cousin stayed one night a week later.
Right now I'm not up for conflict, so I'll keep her for now as I simply don't have time or headspace to deal with this or with finding a trustworthy replacement. But my intention is when life eases off a little, I'll give her notice but I doubt I'll say why.
I don't know - AIBU and this is normal par for the course and I'm being petty? or is this unsatisfactory?
She is a nice lady, even came to Dad's funeral and she seems caring, I firmly believe she wouldn't steal items or cash, and she's nice to talk to. So there are pluses.
As I say, if it's me and I'm being harsh I'll accept that as my head is all over the place.
I'm sorry for your loss and your ongoing stresses, but this cleaner isn't helping you I'm afraid. Time to look for someone else, and think about doing it yourself in the interim. A tip from another thread, is that if you are going to stop the services of someone who has your keys, wait until they arrive and then ask for the keys back there and then.