Spitting feathers

[cuddly61]

The awful mil has over stepped the mark. She has accused me of being money orientated unlike her and her family .
Then the other day on one of her dreaded visits she said something to me which I find is unforgivable.she knows I’m so worried about my elderly parents my mum is blind my dad over the last year dementia has been rapid.
I mentioned to mil the family had been discussing getting them a live in carer to which mil said I should move in and look after them ,then said because them paying a live in carer will use up my inheritance.i was fuming how dare she .yet she says she’s not money orientated.
I told her my parents have saved for their old age and it’s their money and I don’t care about money and it’s there for their care.
She never even apologised. I just find her really cold and calculating.
And if she isn’t money orientated why does she lie on her holiday camp booking forms ,I mean putting some of the adults down as children ,couples down as single parents etc just so they all don’t have to pay so much u see most of the family go every year to this holiday camp.oh and if other family members visit they sneak them in. The whole family are not short of money so why commit fraud if they not money orientated.
I just blocked her on my social media site after she was sending messages giving her unwanted opinion on another matter,I blocked her after telling her exactly what I think of her .so she can’t send a reply lol.
But thing is I don’t want her in my house anymore dp can’t see what she said wrong to me so am I over reacting . I was already upset at my dads rapid deterioration and worried about my mum who is blind and she comes out with that .

[SaltireSaltire]

You need to tell her that how you care for your parents is your business and that you don’t want her to discuss it again.

You need to be worried - sounds like she will want to move in with you when she gets too old to manage 😱

[Imnoth3r3]

Maybe she thought she was being helpful? People like that have no idea how obtuse and thoughtless their comments are. I wouldn't share any such information with an in-law like that in the first place tbh.

[sentMai]

I just blocked her on my social media site after she was sending messages giving her unwanted opinion on another matter,I blocked her after telling her exactly what I think of her .so she can’t send a reply lol.




So, you were discussing the situation with her and she gave her opinion on the matter you brought up?

[speakout]

OP you are over reacting.

You are upset about your parents and that is understandable. Your MIL said some things that you disagree with.
But that is OK.
Let it wash. You are not married to your MIL.
But she is not responsible for your parent's health.
Have a look at your anger.
Perhaps bound up with a lot of your feelings too.

[HollyBollyBooBoo]

But surely she just gave her opinion on a topic you mentioned? People are allowed to have their own opinions in a conversation.

Blocking on social media makes you sound about 15!

Do you think she can ever do anything right towards you or has the relationship deteriorated so far that no matter what she does or says it'll be wrong?

[Pengggwn]

Isn't 'spitting feathers' when you really want a cup of tea?

Spitting nails?

[thirstyformore]

Well who'd have thought it! I never knew spitting feathers also meant angry.

[cuddly61]

I didn’t discuss my parents with her .the day she was here social services rang me and I think she earwigged and also was listening when I was talking to her sister for advice who looked after their mum.
The reason I seem angry I will explain.a couple of years ago I lost my aunt and between my brother and I basically inherited her house and money.
The mil started sticking her nose in saying dp shouldn’t pay towards anything now I had all this money .no I didn’t tell her how much money I was due to inherit dp must had done because when she asked me I just changed the subject .
She accused me of being money orientated and how she wasn’t.
the social media messages from her was about dp defending dp I just had enough told her dp would be fifty in a few years time and was a adult .she had been going on about what I should be doing for dp .by the way dp does zero to help me doesn’t work and is in bed about 16 hours a day but when mil visits wow different person.

[sentMai]

shall we wait for you to give us the whole story to keep your thread going before replying again?

[AsAProfessionalPenis]

I say spitting feathers if I'm angry
I do think you are overreacting op. Stop discussing your personal affairs with her. Job done

[KeepCalm]

You have a DP problem never mind one with your MIL.

Step back, protect your own mental health& finances and stop facilitating them both

[DarkPeakScouter]

So your DP is a cocklodger then? You’re married?

[maggienolia]

Farting sparks is a better phrase

[HollyBollyBooBoo]

Have my first ever LTB. Unless there's more to it like a disability, illness, mental health that is impacting your DPs behaviour that you've also not mentioned!

If he's not adding to your life but is a drain, you don't like his family and you're completely financially independent then run for the hills.