About my neighbour

[stripesandspots10]

I've posted previously about my neighbour under a different name ages ago. It was about her being nosy and peeping in my front living room window from her front garden. Pretending to do gardening but when I looked up at her she would quickly turn away or duck down to the floor. She's an elderly woman who lives alone. I used to think it was loneliness but it that was the case surely she would wave or smile.

Anyway just a moment ago I was sitting on my sofa with a cup of tea having a break as I only had 2 hours sleep with my DS last night. Im a single parent so have no help. I spoke to my DS and when I looked up out of the window I saw her quickly turn around and walk into her house. She had been looking at me. It's really angered me. Why does she keep doing this. I used to ignore it but as summer is coming she's going to be doing it more.
Fed up with it

[Oysterbabe]

Start naked yoga.

[IWantMyHatBack]

I'd go round and ask what she wants and why is she so bloody nosy. Well, I'd feel like it, but probably chicken out.

[Aprilmightbemynewname]

Put a note in your window
Fuck off you nosey old bint.

[Minkywater]

Some people are nosey. Id try something that increases privacy like plants or frosting films that you can stick on windows or a higher fence or strategic arrangements of furniture so she cant see much in. Or move.
Could she be lonely? I wonder if you were to catch her and wave. Would that make her realise you see her? Maybe even say hello?

[lovehak]

I had an old neigh out who did this, when I moved in he had blinds after he removed his blinds and just had bare windows which I believe he did so he could spy on me
he was an absolute weirdo but me complaining about it making me uncomfortable had my housing issue me a warning
they even backed him up when he followed me to the end of the road after I left the house which was witnessed by a housing officer

old people are allowed to make you feel uncomfortable because they are "innocent"

[NewYearNewMe18]

Are you in a position to put in a hedge or fence, or plantation blinds?

[Allmyshilldren]

My nosy elderly next door neighbour does this. She peers in through the letterbox in my front door to see if I’m in, and told me sometimes at night she goes outside to see if our lights are on so she feels less lonely.

I put up with it because she’s nice and I feel sorry for her. She is also an excellent asset to the neighbourhood watch, doesn’t miss a thing! Have told my husband to put his dressing gown on more often though

[Vitalogy]

Not that you should have to but what about putting some voiles up.

[Shizzlestix]

Not that you should have to but what about putting some voiles up.

Really easy fix.

[Bluebird29]

There’s this mirror one way sticky window stuff. She won’t be able to see in

[plire]

We have window film for this. It blocks the lower half of the window (frosted effect). It's great.

[CrochetBelle]

Have you ever actually asked her why she does it?

[WeaselsRising]

Mine does exactly the same. We have to keep the curtains pulled round the side of the bay window or she stands in her garden staring in.

She cut all the bushes on her side out the back so she can see into our garden and back windows. It feels like we are in a zoo.

[underneaththeash]

Either wave and smile next time you catch her or glare. She'll get the message that you've clocked her.

[FoxyBoxter]

How very annoying for you! That would freak me out.

I wonder if she has dementia or early stages of dementia... my MIL became very nosey before she was officially diagnosed. She would literally lean out of upstairs windows when she came to visit us and watch our neighbours giving us a running commentary of what they were doing. She will now stand and stare at people at the most unhelpful of times (an example was standing and watching neighbours trying to get their tired and grumpy grandchildren into the house and MIL continued to stand and watch) She will do the same in restaurants - openly staring at people for long periods of time. Unfortunately due to her dementia she does not realise that this behaviour is intrusive and can be misconstrued by people.

Does the lady have family/friends who visit her who you might be able to approach with your concerns? If it is dementia it will be hard to have the conversation directly with her, asking her to stop because she won't think she is doing anything wrong. Best thing to do is try to divert the behaviour. Either putting things in place which mean she can't see in or if you catch her doing it, speak to her and try to gently redirect her attention elsewhere... Any other neighbours find her doing the same thing to them?

Not easy, I feel for you. Nothing worse than being made to feel uncomfortable in your own home. I hope you are able to get it sorted in some way.

[purplelila2]

But don't you have net curtains /voiles/Venetian/slatted blinds ?

[Aprilmightbemynewname]

With the nice weather op maybe you need a sprinkler put in the front garden?

[NotAgainYoda]

So do something about it, as people have suggested.

Lovely thread to incite 'nosy old bint' type comments

[NotAgainYoda]

purplelila

Bloody hell you are some sort of a genius

[Confusedbeetle]

This is so sad. I can see you would be annoyed but you could increase your own privacy. She may be lonely. She may look away in embarrassment. you have no way of knowing. Are you a kindly friendly neighbour? I guess if you were you might know something about her

[wormery]

If you are feeling brave could you go and knock on her door and say you saw her looking in, did she want to speak to you about something maybe she was trying to get your attention. If she's all flustered and obviously being nosy just ask her not to look through your windows any more.

[ToadOfSadness]

Do the same to her. Go and look in her windows.

You can buy blinds that start at the bottom and pull up so you can have the top of the window bare and cover the bottom.

Window film.

I have individual blinds on each section of the bay window, I keep the ones next to the neighbour closed with something against them so they are as close to the glass as they will go. I also let the plants grow high on that side. Her house his higher on the hill than mine so she can look in easily otherwise.

[User02]

I wish I knew why people are so nosey. I cant understand it myself. I have had nosey neighbours, asking questions about who visited your house yesterday, who was that in your car etc etc. I thought I would do some staring back, I got bored within minutes. I have waved at them which resulted in one female charging out her house to pick a fight until she realised that there were 4 of us in the car.
I think my life is quite boring so I don't see what warrants all the nosey stuff. I have no idea why people would want to know a neighbour's every moved. I have blinds and voiles and curtains which sometimes remain closed for days at a time.
It is so unpleasant

[letsdolunch321]

I would wave & acknowledge her when you see her looking as a previous poster suggested.

[LadyMarmyLard]

I bet she is lonely. You may be the only human 'contact' she has and she may find it comforting just to know that you are there.
I realise that doesn't warrant her invading your privacy..
Loneliness is a horrible feeling. Maybe have a cup of tea with her and ask her about her life. She might back off if she sees you as a friend!