To throw a BBQ today without the most basic and fundamental thing? (lighthearted)

[elfycat]

I've invited some friends and their children round.

I have:

Cleaned the BBQ, ordered charcoal, snipped bay leaves to add to the smoke.

Mowed the grass, blocked potential toddler escape routes, put tools away. Set up tables and chairs.

Filled the fridge with meat and salad. Roasted veg chopped, potato salad made.

Stocked up on condiments. Ketchup. mayo, relish, yellow mustard and those plastic cheese slices.

Have wine, beer, lager, mixers, non-alcoholic options. One drawer in freezer is filled with ice (and sorbet). I'm making Long Island Ice Tea, Woo Woo and Blue Lagoon cocktails in jugs. My drinks cabinet is... extensive.

But as I was washing up the BBQ tongs I realised that I am missing one vital part of the BBQ plan. Something so basic that it might all come to a grinding halt (even with all the booze). What is it?

[DickensianHysteric]

Sausages?

[DickensianHysteric]

Oh no wait, marshmallows!

[Pengggwn]

Bread.

[LiquidCosh]

A man to cook on it?

[Thishatisnotmine]

Bread?

[GimmeFourCrunchies]

The weather.

It's freezing!

[NetflixandWill]

A BBQ

[RoseDog]

Matches or lighter?

[AnoiaUnstickMyDrawers]

I'm going with bread too.

OP you realise you're going to get a list of 101 things and you will realise you have forgotten all of them too, right?

[TwoBlueFish]

Sun ☀️

[Betsy86]

The chef. Sod doing the cooking part. P.s can i come :) days like today i realise i have no friends

[NewToCats]

Matches?

[Sparklingbrook]

Checking the weather forecast?

[NannyR]

Matches?

[x2boys]

Burgers ?

[QforCucumber]

Something to light it with?

[ScreamingValenta]

A match to light the barbecue?

[x2boys]

Not everywhere Gimme the sun's shining brightly here !

[AppleKatie]

Matches

And it is tricky without them. But you know, shops are open.

[elfycat]

Weather forecast is good. I have matches as we have a woodburner. I did get bread and buns.

LiquidCosh got it. We're all women. We have no male-identified person to actually light the BBQ. Poke it expertly to determine the 'ready state' and then to actually operate it. We're doooooooomed!

Betsy86 It's in Suffolk. If you're local drop by. I never under-cater.

[Sparklingbrook]

Sun shining brightly here also but it's chilly and rain forecast for 6pm onwards.

[ScreamingValenta]

elfycat

Can't you rope in a male neighbour?

[littlepill]

Matches!

[littlepill]

AHHHH! Did not RTFT!

[elfycat]

One neighbour is council-type offices/day centre. It's shut at weekends. Another neighbour is a pub, I guess the landlord will be busy on a sunny Saturday.

Damn you DH and your perfect work away for 3 weeks at a time job

I'm going to have to have a stiff drink (maybe the tequila?) and just do it myself, aren't I?

Are there YouTube videos on how to BBQ for women? The BBQ didn't come with instructions I mean what would be the point. Men wouldn't read them after all .

I can operate a grill. It's similar right?