To call SS on myself?(13 Posts)
I've a 1 year old DS, no involvement with father and very limited family help. I've only 2 friends who both have busy lives with kids.
My DS is a handful, he is constantly on the go, he doesn't listen to anything I say (to a point it's understandable as he's only 1!)
He's been getting illness after illness, doesn't sleep through, wakes up countless times through the night to cry and has just learned how to have tantrums!
I'm exhausted. Although over my PND, I feel because of the lack of sleep, I'm starting to slip back into that depressed mood.
WIBU to call SS and ask for help??
Your health visitor might be a better place to start.
1-2 is a tough year. They can receive better than broadcast and it's like code-breaking with added bodily fluids every day.
I would try your health visitor. They can give you support with sleep training techniques and talking therapies with you. Also see your GP .
Do you work? If so do you have a childcare provider and is there any chance you could pay for a little extra childcare to give yourself a rest?
A one year old won't listen to your instructions. They are a baby. Plenty of babies dont sleep through at one but I am sure a health visitor will be able to help you with that.
Another vote for HV to ask for support.
It's so tough at this age
Homestart / health visitor / GP all before social services .
You know what you have explained isn’t your sons fault, or yours, you’re just struggling and need support.
Your little guy will be fine once he’s a little older or/and once you get support, and you will love each other and look back on this and cringe slightly. It doesn’t last!
Def talk to your health visitor. In my area we have an organisation called Sure Start who will offer advice and support.
Also are there any mother/toddler groups near you?
Our library has different activities for mothers and toddlers.
Hang in there
Homestart is amazing OP. They offer simple help just where needed. Things like shopping or just coming round and playing with the baby while you do something else. Their volunteers are all CRB checked and are in the main, older women.
Some good advice here OP - your health visitor is there to help.
I remember this age well, it’s tough, but it will get better honestly, illnesses too, it’s all part of growing up.
You don’t say if you go to any toddler groups but if you can please try them out. Also our libraries here do baby reading and singing sessions each week which might be good to meet others and see that other 1 year olds are just the same !
And also - it’s ok just to have a day chilling out together on the sofa / tv / toys so you can relax a bit.
Could have written this - DS is always ill, still got PND, husband useful as chocolate teapot. Ugh. I hope it gets better!
Just want to echo the above advice - please do contact your Health Visitor and if you can drag yourself to baby groups, despite the tiredness, you may just find other Mum's feeling the same way and willing to share their own woes and possibly a few useful tips.
I am also big fan of just being outside in the fresh air - when mine were that age they were much calmer outside and seemed to be soothed by looking at trees, the ducks in the lake or just playing in a sandpit. I used to take a blanket and spend hours in our local park, which I found was also really beneficial for my own mental health and general well-being. I know how that relentless exhaustion feels, but do give the options suggested a fair go and try not to be too hard on yourself. Best of luck!
1) Call your GP and tell them exactly what you told us here. In fact just show them your message.
2). Get tablets for PND. It’s no joke but it will pass in time.
3) Drag your kid to every playground, playgroup, library music sessions ect ect you can find. I can cost £1 a day. Parks are free. But a frisbee and go to the park and play fetch. Sounds crazy but when he sleeps through the night from exhaustion you will thank me.
4) Bedtime routine: dinner, bath, book, bed by 7. No discussion, no caving in. Just do it. After a week he will crack
5) Get him up at 7am no matter how bed the night was
6) Never let them nap more than 2 hours
7) no tv. No iPad, no sugar, no junk food. Ever. Fruit, veg, protein (meat or substitute) and water/milk. No sugar after 4:30pm. No squash, no treats. Dinner at 5:15.
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