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AIBU?

AIBU to wonder how the chuff people afford kids? *Light-hearted*

32 replies

PeapodBurgundy · 20/04/2018 11:20

I just spotted some lovely blankets in the sale. They can be used as a blanket with a foot pouch, or done up as a sleeping bag. The whole blanket rolls and tucks into the foot pouch to keep it neat when not in use. DS is a real one for having a snuggle up on the sofa of an evening, and would love it. £40 off the original price in a closing down sale, so a lot of money to be saved if you focus on the RRP, but it will still set me back £55 including delivery to get one each for him and the bump for when she arrives. £55 for two blankets! It's going to take me a while to get used to not beinvg able to just get bits like that now we have another on the way.
Do other people manage, or do treats and extras pretty much stop once you have more than one DC?

OP posts:
Furano · 20/04/2018 11:22

You don't have to buy expensive blankets you know

araiwa · 20/04/2018 11:22

They dont spend £55 on blankets probably

Ivegotfamilyandidrinkcupsoftea · 20/04/2018 11:25

My dd is a blanket lover. Her favorite ones are the thick soft knitted like ones from asda/tesco. Shes 5. They are about £6/7 and lovely.

£55 for two blankets is nuts

I have 4 dc
I shop around for stuff

BendydickCuminsnatch · 20/04/2018 11:25

?? These blankets seem a strange thing to focus on. It’s not so bad having a second as we’re reusing most of DS1’s stuff. Bought a new cot and sleepyhead though, rented a Bednest and they’re opposite seasons so still had to buy some stuff though. I wouldn’t bother with these blankets you’re on about though.... I’m aware as they get older that it will get more expensive with clubs and stuff, but hopefully our income will increase and if not we can cut back on stuff. Just cross that bridge when you get to it!! You’ll be fine.

elQuintoConyo · 20/04/2018 11:25

I sew. This has saved me loooooaaaads of money.

And to be honest i'd never have spent £50 on a blanket.

I have made hooded blankets and hooded bath towels - and those hooded open-sided towels for the beach. Shorts, tshirts, cut-off jeans where the knees have gone, put a funky cuff on and turned into jeans shorts. Countless bags (for shoes, for sandwiches, for PE kits, for swimming stuff). I made a sleeping bag two years ago for 4yo's camping trip (in the Med, in July, stonking hot the bag didn't have to be very thick).

I have made countless toys and storage things for toys.

I rock Grin

TawnyPort · 20/04/2018 11:27

We afford kids by not spending stupid amounts on blankets. Hmm

CheeseAndBeans · 20/04/2018 11:29

We just don’t spend ridiculous amounts of money on blankets!

IHateToCashew · 20/04/2018 11:30

I just think you prioritise your money differently. Buying things you know they'll really like, and not stuff that'll be forgotten about.

When DC's have birthdays, Christmas, or a grandparent just fancies buying them a present - you ask for useful practical stuff like the blankets rather than a toy that'll be discarded and forgotten after a couple of days.

PeapodBurgundy · 20/04/2018 11:35

Okay, perhaps I should have put lighthearted in the title! I haven't bought them, nor will I be. £55 is indeed ridiculous for two blankets. DD will be going to all of the same groups as DS goes to, we may even be able to feed them now and then!
I'm not so much focussing on the blankets, as pondering the diffference it's going to make having two of them. I'd likely have bought one for DS as a treat if it was just him.

OP posts:
FedUpMumma · 20/04/2018 11:38

I crochet. The kids love it! (Whilst they are young, lol!)

Yes having kids is expensive, budgeting is a must.

ificouldwritealettertome · 20/04/2018 11:41

I get what you're saying OP! It's nuts what you can spend if you let yourself. I guess you just learn the difference between what you want and what you need 🙂

VladmirsPoutine · 20/04/2018 11:43

Blankets aside yanbu; the cost of raising a child is hugely expensive and increases as they get older; teens are another kettle of (expensive) fish. I've known one or two women say that they won't be having kids solely because they just can't afford them.
And if you factor in the cost of childcare YE-Fucking-Gads!!

Ted27 · 20/04/2018 11:45

its very expensive just for a treat but If I saw something like that I know my son would love, and its a 'bargain' I'd buy it and put it away for Christmas or birthday.
Its april, she might appreciate it more at Christmas

PeapodBurgundy · 20/04/2018 11:47

That's what's just occured to me. The odd splurge on something special that I've done here and there with DS won't be so easy with two of them. We did sums for the basics, and for the groups etc. We're moving DS to cheaper swimming lessons as we can't afford two of them in Water Babies, and we don't feel it's necessary for him to be in a baby swim school any more, so he's moving to a toddler one, but we can fund everythingDS has for DD too, so not much issue there. Spending £30 on a treat is easier than spending £55 on a treat. I was just wondering what people did (e.g. didn't ever get bits like that, do it much less, don;t ecessarily buy for both/all children, so only buy a blanket for DS, not one for DD too). More general musing than genuiney not being able to afford the children Smile

OP posts:
GreyCloudsToday · 20/04/2018 11:50

Still, I'd rather get one nice toy than the 13 pieces of plastic crap MIL treated DS to this Christmas!!

PeapodBurgundy · 20/04/2018 11:51

I should add thet DS is only just turned 2, so has no concept of money to be aware of the difference between a £25 blanket, and the bottle of bubble mixture he was allowed to choose in the £ shop yesterday. Once he's older, he won't be getting things of that price outside of birthdays, Christmas etc unless it's something he actually needs.

OP posts:
PeapodBurgundy · 20/04/2018 11:58

I can't abide tat! Christmas for DS has always been a main present, 2 or 3 little bits (less than £10 each) some books (mainly from The Works on the 10 for £10) and a stocking filled with littler bits (mainly craft stuff that he'll actually use). All reasonably priced (I managed to pick him up a puppet theatre for his main present Christmas gone for £16.99 in the Aldi sale, so I was one happy Mammy wih that purchase) , all things he's used/played with, but no tat that ended up in the bin within a week.
This year we're making DS's gift (a little woodeen post office) DD will be getting re-gifted DS's ballapalooza which is stashed away upstairs from when he outgrew it, and likely a Grimms rainbow as I love them Grin she'll be 4 months old so won't have a clue.

OP posts:
stickladilove · 20/04/2018 12:02

I just bought DD (7) school uniform, 2 polo and 2 cardigans, cost £50. DS starting school this September, yes it gets expensive. YNBU.

loolalion · 20/04/2018 12:02

I guess you just make your choices and prioritise different things to spend your money on. Some people want lots of children and are happy to sacrifice things like holidays and clothes and meals out to put food on the table for their 3/4/5/6/7/8+ kids, others like to have 1 or 2 and know they're able to provide and treat themselves and their children every now and again. I don't see anything wrong with either choice as long as all children are happy and healthy and loved :)

BlankTimes · 20/04/2018 12:04

Have a look in Aldi and Lidl for fluffy blankets, throws etc. and their special buys for kids. They have a huge range and £55 spent in there would be enough for loads of treats. As would £30.

sausagedogsmakechipolatas · 20/04/2018 12:04

It is a lot for blankets. I walk a fine line between buying the best quality I can afford so I don’t end up buying multiple iterations of items that should last, and buying as cheaply as possible.
Childcare is horribly expensive then there’s something of a lull in primary school. Teenagers though...

kateandme · 20/04/2018 12:06

always get the things you can share and state it.so you have the "family" blanket or two.
get creative like for your dc make a place mat for his table setting we adored ours as kids.
and focus on the here and now when giving little gifts.even simply getting his favourite cereal in.letting him choose tea.what is his favourite bowl.the dc loved the blue chipped one and other had the red.simple.when you cant afford other thigns you start to invent special treats in the smallest of things.
he is very young and all they see is right here right now gifts given and long forgotten.whe you do need to get things like t-shirts.pants etc make them in his favourite colour or his lovedcharacter so he sees you've thought of him a little bit more special.
ours was delighted that they got their own flannel and special toothbrush.
its the little things when you cant afford the big that makes them feel loved.
shoe boxes for their special thing to be kept in like cards.have them decorate it.
rocks shaped as heart u find.
really stupid stuff became important to us.
and will sound pathetic and daft to others.but we had no other option as buying gifts wasn't an option.

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hammeringinmyhead · 20/04/2018 12:19

My friends with siblings wouldn't get the same things bought for them. Especially with an age gap of a few years (I know yours is only a couple). You have a while before one is old enough to moan that they didn't get bought the same thing!

PeapodBurgundy · 20/04/2018 12:25

That's lovely Kate. I must admit the vast majority of money after essentials goes on groups, passes to places, trips out. We don;t have the roomfor piles of things, so treats are more often an experience/trip/outing that something physical. His current favourite is the painted rocks game that is hugely popular around here, so it only costs us the price of the paint to decorate them, then very run out we have to hide more, or seek and re hide ones others have done is free, and takes up a few hours, as we usually go to the play area and feed the ducks (50p for a bag of feed) while we're there.

That's a very valid point Hammering. OH and I have a double slanket from pre-baby days, I just had romantic visions of the 4 of us snuggled up on the sofa in a way that would likely NEVER happen in reality I blame the pregnancy hormones Grin

OP posts:
missperegrinespeculiar · 20/04/2018 12:30

Sorry, bit of a derail, but I am always puzzled by people saying "plastic tat they only play with for a couple of days", my kids have loads of plastic tat, but they still play with it ALL THE TIME, in fact, I have difficulties with culling toys because everything is still in use including baby toys that they play with differently now (they reuse Octonaughts octopus as basis for superheroes, for example), are we just "lucky?" I can truly only think of a couple of things they have really not played with much (Thomas the Tank trains and tracks, they hate Thomas for some reason!), I'd love to get rid of some stuff!!

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