Think he is crazy and end this relationship?

[DextroDependant]

Picking my kids up from school one day and a man I dated for 6 months about 11 years ago said hello to me. He must have moved to the area.

My current partner was with me and said who is that so I said someone I dated before I had the kids.

After that we saw him once more and then I never saw him again.

My current partner whenever he comes to the school with me tends to wait across the road with the dog, he always says that he has seen him. I say he must be mistaken because I haven't seen him since.

Anyway today he went to collect the kids for me because I am not feeling well.
He says oh I saw your ex, I took a photo to prove it. When he got home the picture was not my ex so at some point he has obviously got confused.

Anyway he has caused a big row saying I have lied to him and I did say that that man was my ex. I googled my actual ex to show him and he got a right cob on bevaise I wanted to look him up.

So

A) How could I lie when the only reason the man was brought up is because he said hello to me. Therefore I couldn't pretend that it was someone else.

B) why on earth would I lie about it anyway? For what purpose?

C) why does it matter! We dated for 6 months more than a decade ago. It's really totally a non issue.

So AIBU to just end this relationship. I don't have the energy to argue over stupid things any more I am looking the will to live!

[Zeelove]

No yanbu. Life's too short for petty arguments like that

[Bananalanacake]

How long have you been with your current partner. Sounds a bit needy if he doesn't trust you.

[Cornettoninja]

How entangled are you with him I.e do you live together?

I'd be tempted to send him home with a flea in his ear if he didn't live with me,

[DextroDependant]

We have been together about 18 months, we don't live together and he has already been sent home. I literally don't know how to deal with such ridiculousness so I just told him to go.

[Aprilmightmemynewname]

Unless he was a virgin when you met tell him to either grow up or fuck off.

[NeedsAsockamnesty]

Sounds like he has some quite ermm interesting jealiously issues

[nutbrownhare15]

Life's too short to be with someone who thinks like this. I'd get rid.

[Neverender]

I was dating someone years ago and got a call from a male friend. He saw the name on my phone and went off on one and stormed out. That was it for me. I told him to go home and never saw him again.

[LanguidLobster]

He has no right to mess with your head like that.

Yes I would get out, if ex wasn't there then he just wasn't.

[Tenementfunster]

You need to get rid. This will not get better.

[Wherearemymarbles]

What twat. Time to end it!!!!!!

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

Your current partner's behaviour sounds very intense and odd.
Accompanying you on the school run and standing on the other side of the road as surveillance?

I'd be quite worried how he'll take the news that you want to split up. It all might turn a bit stalkerish. He'll definitely accuse you of wanting to sleep with this ex if you tell him it's over.

[DextroDependant]

We have a holiday booked in a few weeks and I am dreading it.

Oh yes he will definitely think I am ending it for the ex (who I havent seen in months.....)

[Bluntness100]

Significant jealousy issues are a big red flag. I'd get now. His behavIour is not normal.

[ReanimatedSGB]

Yes, dump the partner. Tell him he's dumped, that the relationship is not working for you and he is not to contact you again. (Unless you have any belongings of his or he has anything of yours that you want back).
You do not have to discuss it with him, or 'meet to talk it over', and if he makes a pest of himself, warn him you will inform the police and have him charged with harassment, and do it if you need to.
A man this irrationally jealous needs to be kicked out of your life with no compromise at all. 'Dick is abundant and low value' - there are plenty more men out there who are not obsessive wankstains.

[LanguidLobster]

A naughty part of me wants to say to tell him you want to be free of him so that you can lovingly hang across the other side of the road and exchange glances with someone of 11 years ago. Even if you're not entirely sure who it was.

Seriously if he's questioning you that much it's probably not worth it, it starts making you doubt yourself.

[ReanimatedSGB]

Ah x post. Re the holiday - who's got the tickets? Who paid? If you can cut your losses by just refusing to go, do that - or if you can buy him out and go with a mate, that might be an option. Or find out what the cancellation costs would be. Again, you do not need Dickhead's permission or co-operation - you can't be forced to go on holiday with someone you no longer want contact with. The absolute worst that could happen would be you have to pay for it.

[Undercoverbanana]

He sounds exhausting. A real fun-sponge. Move on.

[MrsPicklesonSmythe]

In a happy, secure relationship this issue would never have arisen. Yanbu.

[JamPasty]

Ditch him and cancel the holiday. If he's like this at only 18 months, imagine how controlling he would be once you've been together years!!

[Gottagetmoving]

He is insecure and needy. Any sign of you accepting this attitude will make it worse and worse.
End it or tell him to get help

[DextroDependant]

I have booked and paid for me and the kids and he has booked separately for himself.

The kids would be gutted if we cancel now but I have no control over his tickets.

Maybe I can put up with him for a fewfewore weeks and dump him when we get back but what if he is an arse while we are away.

[VladmirsPoutine]

You don't really ever need an 'excuse' as it were, to end a relationship. This bloke seems at best jealous and at worst unhinged. Forget the holiday. LTB and get on with your life.

[MyKingdomForBrie]

YANBU, get rid. Just go on the holiday and ask him not to come for the kids sake - pay him back for his ticket if you can.

[TheNaze73]

I couldn’t be with a jealous person like that.

Too suffocating, it’s really not nice