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To want a home birth?

(648 Posts)
InMemoryOfSleep Tue 20-Mar-18 08:28:51

I’m not pregnant (yet), but chatting to my mum and some friends recently I mentioned I’d like a home birth next time. Their reactions weren’t positive, to say the least confused - despite me explaining that, for a 2nd baby, home birth is as safe as an MLU, and both are safer than a hospital. They’ve made me really doubt myself - having read the research and stats I was convinced it’s the best option, but am I missing something?!

RedPandaMama Tue 20-Mar-18 08:33:31

I wish I'd had a home birth. My labour was looong and I'd much rather have been at home watching telly with the cat than in the hospital, and my hospital experience was very positive!

By the time we have our next child hopefully we'll have moved into a bigger house and I'd like to have a home birth - only if I lived close enough to the hospital that they could get me there very quickly if there were a problem. I know someone who planned a home birth but lived 40 minutes from the hospital, had to be rushed there in an ambulance when the baby got stuck and they both nearly died, it sounded terrifying. In that case I wouldn't do it. Our current house is 7 minutes away so I wish I had really!

A mum friend who had a home birth said it was amazing and she would do it again, and make sure to practice breathing with hypnobirthing videos on YouTube first!

Whatever you decide hope you have a safe and enjoyable labour flowers

divadee Tue 20-Mar-18 08:33:47

I had a home birth and from some people's reactions it was akin to being an abuser. The crap I got from people was unbelievable. I just replied "well you have your opinion and I have mine".

If it's something you really want to do go ahead and do it. It is easier to book a home birth and cancel if you decide you want to go in to hospital than not have one booked at all.

I have to say I loved my home birth and although I was transferred in after the birth (I won't scare you with the details!) I am still a massive advocate of home births.

RoryHatesCoffee Tue 20-Mar-18 08:40:00

I'm not sure what you mean by safer based on evidence or statistics, but all my friends that are or have been midwives all say the most relaxed births they've witnessed are home births.
Just don't tell your family members your plans and crack on!

chocolatesun Tue 20-Mar-18 08:41:27

I really wanted a Home birth for my second baby but couldn’t for health reasons. There are a lot of negative attitudes and if you go down this path you’ll just have to get thick skin and ignore them all. Most people mean well and just aren’t aware of the upsides. Hospitals are horrible and why not avoid the risk of infection and give birth in your own home. Go for it!

InMemoryOfSleep Tue 20-Mar-18 08:58:45

Rory - less likely to have an ‘adverse’ outcome for baby, and more likely to have a straightforward birth - as in no interventions.

UpSideDownBrain Tue 20-Mar-18 09:01:51

I fought tooth and nail to have a home birth and it was the worst decision of my life.
There is a reason why hospitals have highly trained staff and expensive medical equipment available 24/7.

Camomila Tue 20-Mar-18 09:03:42

I think people get confused by statistics tbh (me included)
But no YANBU, if you've had an ok first birth it is statistically safer...but things could go 'more' wrong if they do go wrong...but then again you are much more likely to die if a plane crashes than a car and planes are still safer...

Actually ignore me, i'm all dosed up on lemsip.

YANBU though.

InMemoryOfSleep Tue 20-Mar-18 09:05:03

I guess the other influencing factor for me is that our MLU and hospital are both 20 mins away, but the in the opposite direction! So I could end up travelling 20 mins tothe MLU mid-labour, and then being ambulanced back past our front door to get to the hospital if I had complications! So it seems easier to just stay at home grin

homeTIRF Tue 20-Mar-18 09:05:05

Do you have any kind of proof for the statistics you claim about safety?

It seems akin to swapping chemotherapy for essential oils.

What is something goes wrong? Do you have your husband boil water and tear bedsheets into strips?

It's proper 'woke' bullshit.

can vegan babies breastfeed?

newshmoo74 Tue 20-Mar-18 09:06:08

My second baby was born suddenly at home (delivered by my mother). The birth was so stress free that I convinced my husband to let me plan a home birth for my third; unfortunately the labour was a whole lot longer and I retained my placenta which meant I had to be taken to hospital by ambulance and separate to my newborn.

Everything was ok in the end and I am happy with my choices but I would research your options and make sure that if things didn’t go to plan you would be able to get quick medical help.

InMemoryOfSleep Tue 20-Mar-18 09:06:59

@HomeTIRF - yep it’s from the Birthplace study, you’ll find it if you google it.

InMemoryOfSleep Tue 20-Mar-18 09:08:37

Sorry, posted before I was done - you get transferred to the hospital f something goes wrong, same as you would if you’d started off in an MLU. And I’m interested that you compare birth to chemotherapy - birth is not an illness for a start!

OutyMcOutface Tue 20-Mar-18 09:09:46

You need to learn to read between the lines. They aren’t safer than birthing in hospital. The stats in hospitals are worse because deliveries that are expected to be difficult start there. It’s less safe to birth at home in the event of a complication but women who are likely to experience complications are unlikely to birth at home.

WorraLiberty Tue 20-Mar-18 09:11:09

I had my 3rd DC at home

Best birthing experience out of the 3 of them.

InMemoryOfSleep Tue 20-Mar-18 09:11:55

@OutyMcOutface nope, these are stats comparing the outcomes for low risk women, so high risk women (ie women who have to labour in hospital) aren’t taken into account.

QueenAravisOfArchenland Tue 20-Mar-18 09:13:19

Do you have any kind of proof for the statistics you claim about safety?

They are widely recognised and incorporated into NICE guidelines, which state that low risk second time mothers should be actively encouraged to labour and birth somewhere other than labour ward, either an MLU or at home.

Research actively recognises that although medical care can be lifesaving in the right circumstances, too much of it when it isn't needed is a bad thing.

BoredOnMatLeave Tue 20-Mar-18 09:13:33

I love the idea of a home birth but wouldn't for 3 reasons:

1 - The mess. I was pretty high on G&A during DD's birth but I remember it looking like a horror movie.
2 - Closest hospital is 15 miles away but can take anything from 20 mins to an hour depending on the traffic
3 - Does the NHS really have the funds to be letting people have their own midwife at home? In DD's birth my midwife was only there every 30 mins just to check me then the actual pushing part. The rest of the time she was very busy.

VioletteValentia Tue 20-Mar-18 09:14:19

I wouldn’t. I think it’s incredibly selfish personally, because if it all goes wrong, it could be catastrophic. You’ve got no medical equipment there. I’m sure women in countries where they struggle to access healthcare think women in the US and UK are really bizarre for this.

That said, it’s your own personal choice and should always be your choice. If it’s what you want, then don’t be dissuaded by others.

Avaricii Tue 20-Mar-18 09:14:52

I think a home birth sounds more relaxing if you're not the sort of person who is reassured by being surrounded by doctors.

Stats can be misintepreted. Yes home births are less likely to results in interventions and some of this is due to mothers feeling more relaxed.
However most of it is due to only low risk births happening at home. So full term, single baby, likely to have given birth before, no medical complications, 'normal' size baby... etc.
If you compare like for like- so just very low risk births at home vs very low risk at hospital its still likely to mean fewer interventions- but some of that is because you can't have many types of interventions at a home birth, so would only be in cases of hospital admission.

Do what you feel most comfortable with. I wouldn't because of the prep and clean up! But thats me. Go for it!

monkerina Tue 20-Mar-18 09:15:46

I'm 11 weeks and planning a homebirth with my second; my first was a low risk, relatively fast and painless delivery in MLU that I wanted to be at home but DH was worried so I relented! In my blue book it says homebirth is less stressful and more likely to result in a 'normal' birth; my midwife is totally on board and excited!

I think homebirth is seen as unusual now, as birth is almost seen as a medical procedure rather than a natural process. I don't intend to tell many people as I'm expecting just the reaction you experienced- fuck em, they're not the ones doing the labour! You do the labour, you get to choose your preference for how/where!

InMemoryOfSleep Tue 20-Mar-18 09:15:49

@BoredOnMatLeave it’s actually cheaper to have a home birth than a hospital one - I guess as you’re not taking up an expensive hospital room and resources.

VioletteValentia Tue 20-Mar-18 09:16:17

It's proper 'woke' bullshit.

My feelings exactly.

ScrumpyBetty Tue 20-Mar-18 09:16:23

The trouble is that if something goes wrong, things can deteriorate very quickly
Childbirth is inherently risky, and things can go wrong in an instant. We are very lucky to live in a country with access to hospitals and doctors who can be there in two seconds if needed. Throughout history it was really common for babies and mothers to die in childbirth.

ScrumpyBetty Tue 20-Mar-18 09:17:25

VioletteValentia exactly!

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