DPs moods

[OceanMoon]

DP is in a bit of a mood with me because I've been snacking after dinner (yes I am a grown woman). His reason is that I'll slowly but surely start to gain weight and I won't be happy with myself and might find it hard to lose the weight etc. He also gave me a bit of a lecture about fruit and then went to sleep in a huff My problem is that I have a bag of crisps or a belvita at most after 11pm so AIBU to think he's overreacting or is he just looking out for me? I know most partners wouldn't dare to bring up their partners eating habits as a point of criticism...

[Birdsgottafly]

Are you, or have been overweight and vocally unhappy about it?

[Ickyockycocky]

It’s none of his fucking business. Tell him to shut up and leave you alone. You are not a child you are a grown woman.

[OceanMoon]

I'm not overweight, I'm still a size 10, but I am vocal about not wanting to gain weight and when I do gain some pounds I am unhappy about it

[Birdsgottafly]

If he is having to listen to talking about putting on weight, then I can understand him commenting. If you wasn't then I would say that it isn't his business, but you are making it his business.

" I know most partners wouldn't dare to bring up their partners eating habits as a point of criticism"

He's pointing out that you are about to do something self destructive.

It's very wearing listening to someone go on about their weight, then watching them eating high fat/calorie foods.

I agree that you should eat what you want, but don't then inflict your unhappiness about the consequences on him.

[OceanMoon]

Fair point well made

[TIRFandProud]

Your second post makes him sound completely reasonable.

Not unlike him drinking too much, being a pain in the arse when hungover and then being annoyed when you suggest he doesn't drink too much.

I think it's good that you have a partner who will talk to you rather than not say anything. The whole love your body whatever size you are thing is dangerous and frustrating for those who try to help those they care about.

I've stopped seeing a fat friend (no, you aren't at size 10) who would eat and eat and eat and then moan about it. Too much hard work for me to listen to.



"It’s none of his fucking business"

Yes it is. The OP has made it his business. Stop being all angry and indignant and think about the situation for a few seconds.

[GrannyGrissle]

I wish i had someone moderating what i stuff in my face Could you put him to work as a diet hotline advisor?!

[pangolina]

I don't think he has done anything wrong tbh. I think, eat what you want when you want and don't mention your weight, but complaining about it/ mentioning you're conscious of it while eating unhealthy foods is a little irksome to witness.

[Spoog1971xx]

If you grumble it's fair enough. Wish mine would - he's always chucking bags of skips at me

[WellThisIsShit]

I don’t know.

Yes, pointing it out, drawing your attention to self destructive behaviour is fine.

But telling you off, whining and grumbling and going to bed in a huff about it... is that really supportive, helpful, positive behaviour? Really?

[prideofaberdeen]

I'm in two minds. I have a bad relationship with food, snack way to much in the evenings, then gain weight and get annoyed. Yes it's my choice to do this, but I'd actually like my DH to gently remind me that I don't need that chocolate etc and that I hate it when inevitably get chubbier. For me, I NEED someone to tell me go stop!