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AIBU?

Should I ask my new lodger to leave?

221 replies

Pugmummy92 · 18/03/2018 15:54

I have recently taken on a male lodger much older than me, he’s in his fifties (I’m 25). I own my own home, just me and my pug living here, and have previously rented one of my single rooms out.

My new lodger only moved in last week, paying two weeks’ rent as he wanted to have an initial trial period. However, since moving in, he appears to have moved half a house worth of belongings with him, despite only renting a very small single room! He has now occupied most of the garden shed, several kitchen cupboards (it was only agreed to have one cupboard and half the fridge), half the understairs cupboard and half my third bedroom too! He is also leaving the heating on constant (even when he’s not at home!)

Another reason for me taking on a lodger was to look after my pug a couple of nights a week, and to feed him should he finish work earlier. He is home earlier than me every day of the week so the agreement was that he feed my dog and let him out etc. before I’m home. He seems to be quite reluctant to do this now he has moved in and has quite a standoffish attitude towards looking after my dog, despite claiming to be a dog lover himself!

AIBU to give him notice at the end of his two weeks’ trial period??

He’s not very easy to talk about problems with, and makes me feel like I am the one creating problems already even after just one week. I just don’t know if I can stand living with someone who takes over the entire house and all my free space, and has no regard for my ever increasing house bills, and isn’t keen on looking after my dog?

Advice please! X

OP posts:
RoseWhiteTips · 18/03/2018 15:55

Get rid. It is your house.

Lobsterface · 18/03/2018 15:56

It’s not working out, you’re not being unreasonable. But did you say anything when he moved all the stuff in?

IAmWonkoTheSane · 18/03/2018 15:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BMW6 · 18/03/2018 15:59

Get rid.

Evelynismycatsformerspyname · 18/03/2018 16:01

Definitely give him notice - if he's pushing the boundaries already it will only get worse.

Pugmummy92 · 18/03/2018 16:01

Thanks guys! I agreed to him moving one bicycle in and two boxes into a spare room, but nothing more.. Silly me didn’t bother to check the the other rooms of the house until last night and I can’t even open the door to my third bedroom for bin bags full of goodness knows what! I feel he’s been rude not to mention this to me, and worry about what else he will hope to slip by me should he remain living here. I’m definitely not comfortable at all and now worried about how to tell him all this being a young female living alone?! X

OP posts:
LEMtheoriginal · 18/03/2018 16:02

He paid two weeks rent in case it didn't work - it hasn't worked so get rid of him

milliesmaller · 18/03/2018 16:02

Mine is worse. He has a habit of inviting his friends over, who then take over the kitchen, dining room and nutter in a language I don't understand- it's driving me nuts!

sparklepops123 · 18/03/2018 16:03

God no, get rid of him ASAP

Evelynismycatsformerspyname · 18/03/2018 16:03

Just tell him immediately that the trial period it isn't working out, and he will need to move out by X date (the last day of the trial 2 weeks).

SmallBlondeMama · 18/03/2018 16:03

Omg get rid of him ASAP!

ClemDanfango · 18/03/2018 16:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hidingtonothing · 18/03/2018 16:04

Yep, he's not sticking to the agreement so give him notice, the fact that he's already doing so despite knowing it's a trial period does not bode well imo. It's your house and absolutely your right to choose who you share it with.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 18/03/2018 16:05

Tell him he is to leave at the end of his 2 weeks. Be blunt, let him know now. It simply is not what you agreed to, he is to leave.

And then write up a list of things you will and will not accept from a lodger. Not to give to the next lodger but to remind yourself of your own boundaries.

Fluffyears · 18/03/2018 16:11

Yep i’d Get rid. Do you have someone who can be with you when you tell him if you feel a bit threatened?

Alabama3 · 18/03/2018 16:17

well tell him hes had the trial period and its not working for you

MyBrilliantDisguise · 18/03/2018 16:19

You need someone to be with you when you tell him, but you do need to tell him immediately. Can your mum or dad be there?

Tbh, I would be wondering at a man that age renting a small single room in a house - it's pretty obvious he'd have more stuff, isn't it?

I'm also pretty shocked that you'd rent out a room to a man twice your age - he's hardly going to be good company for you. Wouldn't you prefer someone your own age?

Time40 · 18/03/2018 16:22

Definitely get rid of him.

That sort of behaviour isn't unusual, though. I've had a lot of experience with lodgers, and I've found that people will push the boundaries more often than not - and especially about excess stuff. People are just natural space invaders. You need a lot of clear rules before you start.

Flomy · 18/03/2018 16:23

Oh god YANBU. Get rid.

I would only feel comfortable if it was a female lodger. Advertise at your local hospital. There are usually student nurses/physios etc that need a room.

sonjadog · 18/03/2018 16:26

Definitely get rid.

MaluCachu · 18/03/2018 16:27

Make sure you have someone with you when you tell him he's taking the piss/it's not working out.

Jon66 · 18/03/2018 16:27

Give him a few days notice and get him to move, he needs to go, lack of boundaries will only get worse.

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Idontdowindows · 18/03/2018 16:27

Oh goodness, get rid and make sure you have a few friends there when you tell him.

Time40 · 18/03/2018 16:27

And then write up a list of things you will and will not accept from a lodger. Not to give to the next lodger but to remind yourself of your own boundaries

Actually, I would do that and then give it to the lodger, while you are still negotiating the deal and before the lodger moves in. Make it very clear which spaces are available for the lodger's use, and which aren't. If you don't want things in your hall, actually write down, "Bikes and any other items are not to be stored in the hall" - if you don't, I can absolutely guarantee that your hall (and everywhere else) will be full in no time.

Mrsmadevans · 18/03/2018 16:28

Get rid asap, what sort of man in his fifties does this ?

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