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To complain to the school about this

(119 Posts)
CradleCrapNap Sat 17-Mar-18 19:20:51

My DD who is in reception has come home twice now and said she was given a sticker for eating all of her lunch. AIBU to complain to the school and point out they are encouraging a piss poor attitude towards food and not going to help the obesity crisis by doing this? Surely eating everything in sight should not be encouraged or rewarded? We teach our kids that you eat when hungry and stop when you are full. This teaches them to carry on regardless in pursuit of praise/reward. It’s really bugging me but AIBU and reading too much into it? They’ve also advertised for lunchtime assistants who should ‘encourage children to eat’. By all means point out when they only have 5 mins left etc as I know they all dawdle but has any child ever become under nourished by failing to nag them to have ‘one more bite’ or does it just make mealtimes a battleground?

GreenDiscovery Sat 17-Mar-18 19:23:50

YABU.. Have you seen school meals? IME (TA), school portions are small and children should be encouraged to eat it all. You're being over the top. There'd be no problem if people made appropriate portion sizes.

ittakes2 Sat 17-Mar-18 19:25:02

I agree with you to a certain extent - but I think schools assume parents will put an amount of food their children will eat in their lunchbox. I suspect with the younger children the school is trying to get children to focus on eating to ensure they have the fuel their need to concentrate on their afternoon sessions.
Honestly, as long as you are not rewarding her at home for eating all her dinner she will be Ok.

Anasnake Sat 17-Mar-18 19:25:05

Don't be ridiculous

NapQueen Sat 17-Mar-18 19:25:18

I reckon they are doing it to counter the probably relentless "im finished" from kids who take one bite then want to play out.

I never understand why they dont do playtime before food.

PurpleDaisies Sat 17-Mar-18 19:26:47

YABU. Many children are fussy eaters and encouraging them to eat and try a variety of foods is really important.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks Sat 17-Mar-18 19:27:26

I was invited to a Mother's Day lunch at school a few years ago. The portions are too big for nursery and reception and too small for yr4 up.

Heartworries Sat 17-Mar-18 19:28:07

You might be putting too much in their lunch box then....if the intention is not to eat it all, put less in....

littleducks Sat 17-Mar-18 19:28:28

This used to annoy me too. I used to laugh and comment on how the school was doing its bit for the childhood obesity crisis at pick up.

They probably had queues of people complaining that nobody encouraged little Johnny to eat though.

Aprilmightmemynewname Sat 17-Mar-18 19:28:54

School lunches are now approved suitable for dc to eat so encouraging them means we get our extortionatly priced money's worth!!

T1M2N3T4 Sat 17-Mar-18 19:30:41

I give out stickers to kids that eat all their lunch. Only for eating the main course not the pudding.
The reasoning behind them is to encourage those children who say they're finished just so they can get outside to play. The children who eat hardly anything because they're a slower eating than their best mate who shovels it all in and they want to get pudding together.
By all means complain to school and ask that your child not receive them but it won't stop others getting them.
Yabu and a bit that parent

shouldwestayorshouldwego Sat 17-Mar-18 19:31:00

Most children do not need to be rewarded for clearing their plate and there is good evidence that this approach increases obesity. If you raise it they will look at you as if you have three heads even when it is accompanied by peer reviewed evidence.

WineAndTiramisu Sat 17-Mar-18 19:31:00

I would agree that it's inappropriate, they don't need to eat everything every day, it's counter productive to encourage always finishing what's on your plate, even when you're full!

CradleCrapNap Sat 17-Mar-18 19:31:05

Yes i’ve Eaten with DD at her school once. The only problem was that the pasta had been boiled for roughly 7 weeks. Portion sizes were fine. Especially for children. Are you saying that a jacket potato with cheese and beans, followed by a chocolate brownie (typical school lunch for my DD, that or toast dinner), is not enough calories for a four year old at lunchtime?

CradleCrapNap Sat 17-Mar-18 19:31:30

Roast, not toast!

Quickerthanavicar Sat 17-Mar-18 19:31:47

I imagine she get Universal Free School Meals. Children, especially in Reception often need to be encouraged to try new food. Maybe you should volunteer to help out.

1AngelicFruitCake Sat 17-Mar-18 19:32:12

How could they do playtime before food though?

There'd be loads of pressure to get the children in the hall, whilst children aren't fully enjoying their playing out time because they are really hungry (especially the little ones).

Cleanermaidcook Sat 17-Mar-18 19:33:15

Yabu
School meals portions are really small they need to be encouraged to eat or they will be hungry and have no energy in the afternoon.
I used to be a lunch time assistant and many young children really do need encouraging to eat as they will spend up to an hour talking to their friends/ wantinget to just eat their desert or trying not to eat just to get out to play.

PurpleDaisies Sat 17-Mar-18 19:33:52

How could they do playtime before food though?

The children are called in in shifts. Some have playtime before, others after.

SuperPug Sat 17-Mar-18 19:35:07

I feel really sorry for primary schools and teachers tbh.
Another thread was an aibu complaining about a lack of stickers. This one is about too many. I do get your reasoning behind this, but still...
Quite a few kids are fussy eaters. They are not exactly going to be focused and alert if they are very hungry. If they're packed lunches, isn't it the responsibility of the parents to provide a healthy meal, with a reasonable amount of food?

CradleCrapNap Sat 17-Mar-18 19:36:18

I agree with NapQueen, playtime should be for a set amount of time before lunch. There’d be no problem then.

upsideup Sat 17-Mar-18 19:37:48

Lots of people will say YANBU OP but I completely agree with you
Nobody who has any experiance with eating disorders will advice you use food as a means for rewarding or punishment ever.
Asides from encouraging children to eat past when they are full, its punishing (or not rewarding) children who couldnt eat it all like they have done something wrong and the children who were more hungry or who have been encouraged to carry on eating even when they are not hungry are better.

TeaforTiger Sat 17-Mar-18 19:37:57

For every parent that complains about the school encouraging eating, there is another moaning that their child isn't eating enough and why can't they do more.

TabbyMumz Sat 17-Mar-18 19:38:05

Goodness me...making children finish their dinner dies not make an obesity crises.

SureIusedtobetaller Sat 17-Mar-18 19:38:10

We get endless complaints about children not eating their lunch though. Just another area in which we can’t win!
The obesity crisis seems to be fuelled by parents putting a dunker, crisps, a choc muffin, a choc biscuit and squash in the lunchbox... have also seen a 4 pack of choc muffins, multiple bags of crisps. Most children have around 6 items.

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