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AIBU?

To ask you to cheer me up with funny things your kids say?

168 replies

smileygrapefruit · 15/03/2018 16:52

I'm stuck at home struck with the flu trying my very best to care for 3 DC under 4. To say I'm struggling is an understatement. My 2 year old just cheered me up though. I'm in pj bottoms and a zip up hoody (no bra- relevant) and have just breastfed baby. As I went to zip my hoody back up 2 year old asks, shocked, "where your boobie lid?!" Please cheer me up with some funny things your kids have said when they haven't known the name of or mispronounced something. Oh another one, prawn crackers are known as knackers in our house as that is what now 4 yo called them when she was little!

OP posts:
Bananamanfan · 15/03/2018 16:56

Instead of relaxing, my dd & ds2Grin "belax" DH & I often wish we had more time "belaxing" Hope you feel better soon.Flowers

TurtleCavalryIsSeriousShit · 15/03/2018 16:56

Ah sorry to hear you're sick.

We still call spaghetti 'basghetti' in my house after my little sister couldn't say it.

And DS2 couldn't say Marlene, so called her Aunty Money. We still call her that. I'm sure there's more...will have a think.

Hope you feel better soon Flowers

PodgeBod · 15/03/2018 17:03

My daughter just turned 3 last month. Earlier today I was telling her about St Patrick's day on Saturday and asked her if she knew what Ireland was
She said "yes it's a tortoise and you tie a rocket to it and go to the moon" I'm thinking she's going to be a bit disappointed on Saturday when we just make some soda bread!

Handsfull13 · 15/03/2018 17:05

Mine aren't talking yet but we were playing peek-a-boo with a muslin and one twin took it from me and instead on putting it on his head it went over his back and now he is walking around with a cape on.
The other loves to chat down the phone (Baby gibberish) he pinched my phone while I was FaceTiming my mum so she was treated to the sight of in his ear and being shouted at.
For some reason he sounds more aggressive when he's got a real phone.

MereDintofPandiculation · 15/03/2018 17:06

In tears on being told his part in the nursery school nativity "I don't want to be a shepherd's pie and be eaten"

Yecartmannew · 15/03/2018 17:07

Gladiators (Radiators)
Testicle (Technical)
and egg and shoulders (soldiers) are the 3 we still use now, kids are 25, 23 and 21!

holyshitdude · 15/03/2018 17:11

My 2 year old ds said the babas at nursery took his train so he squashed them Shock and when he was babbling on about fireman Sam, he said what sounded like "sam's on crack"

Guardsman18 · 15/03/2018 17:13

When my son was 3 ish and having a bath, there were little bits of his woollen sock in there.

I said - oh it's just a little bit of fluff. He then said - oh, is that what they look like after they come out of your bottom?

I could've eaten him!

NomsQualityStreets · 15/03/2018 17:13

DS (2) absolutely loves any kind of berry, you name it he eats it. He's always called blueberries BUBUs and from there for some reason strawberries are now called BOOBIES.

I often half die half giggle when I've got a toddler following me around the supermarket fruit aisle frantically shouting "BOOBIES!" at strawberries.

superlibrarian · 15/03/2018 17:13

16mo has very few word's yet but he can proudly announce “BURP!!“ very loudly every time he has burped Blush

Marmite27 · 15/03/2018 17:15

My 2 year old has been asking her to ‘ghost me’ for the past few days and it’s had us flummoxed.

Until this morning when I put a really bright light on and she pointed at her shadow and shouted ‘my ghost is here!’

There’s also been a hungry ghost in her tummy - but he only wants things like biscuits, chocolate and crisps to eat, so I’m not sure how authentic he is Grin

NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom · 15/03/2018 17:16

Pegwigs are penguins
Molarmolar is a lawnmower
Most food items were bisgusting.
Could go on forever really.
Hope you're feeling better soon.

justbinthefeckinbyebyebox · 15/03/2018 17:17

Ds aged 3 learned the nursery rhyme Old MacDonald first, and now calls McDonalds
Old MacDonalds, doesn't sound as bad, hopefully! Wink

BillyAndTheSillies · 15/03/2018 17:17

DS (2) has lots of ones which I love. His key worker at Nursery is from Boston and he's picked up her twang. Sounds a bit strange coming from a toddler in the east end though.

Glasses are "gwasses" at the moment. Every dinosaur is a "dodocus" because diplodocus are his favourites.

A few weeks ago, I had a bottle of water and said "would you like some" and now every drink which isn't in a sippy cup he calls "some". "I have that some please mummy?".

FloControl · 15/03/2018 17:20

Once when I was about three, I boldly answered the telephone with a very bright, "Trumpton Fire Station, Captain Flack speaking !" Our caller was most amused.

lanbro · 15/03/2018 17:22

Eldest dd was learning about painters at school, weeks later Dd2 4yo randomly pipes up with "I can't believe Vincent Van Gogh cut his own ear off "!!

Nomad86 · 15/03/2018 17:22

2 favourites of mine...

"why is it called a moo-seum if there aren't any cows there?"

Pointed out a disabled sign to DH and told him it's for people in pushchairs or wheelbarrows.

morningrunner · 15/03/2018 17:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nomad86 · 15/03/2018 17:26

Oh and babloons (balloons)

sockunicorn · 15/03/2018 17:29

when my DD was 5 and we were on holiday she told me she was going to come on holiday to Canada again when she 18. I asked if mummy could come too. She replied "if youre not dead by then". If alive I would only have been early 40s when shes 18

MajestyRoyale · 15/03/2018 17:29

DS likes cars. DS also likes the colour red, so, naturally, he loves red cars. Only he can't pronounce his r's too good. So each trip on the bus consists of me trying to stop him pointing out the 'wankers'.....

lookingforaline18 · 15/03/2018 17:30

My toddler shouted "dick!" really loudly when he saw a stick the other day Grin

Same toddler used to be obsessed with "buggers", meaning diggers.

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MrsWhirly · 15/03/2018 17:30

when Dd was about 2 I explained to her that if anyone touched her privates, showed them theirs or asked to see hers, she was to tell to straight away. About a week later on a quiet train, she loudly - and concerned - said “ Mum, if anyone ever touches your private parts - you tell me!” Queue lots of hysterical and some flabbergasted London commuters. She was so cute at that age though, I could have eaten her x

Nanasueathome · 15/03/2018 17:32

I took my grandson to have his injections
He told his Mum and Dad that the nurse had stuck nails in his arms

smileygrapefruit · 15/03/2018 18:24

Thanks for these, they are brilliant! I bloomin' love toddlers. On the theme of accidental swearing my two year old clearly says fuck instead of foot.

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