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If you were a mum of an adult would be offended if

(82 Posts)
alligatortoss Mon 12-Mar-18 23:49:02

Their mother in law signed their birthday card from mum?

If you had a good relationship with your child.

NickyNora Mon 12-Mar-18 23:50:08


53rdWay Mon 12-Mar-18 23:51:22

I would find it weird, but my SIL and her family would love it and view it as a sign of being welcomed into the wider family. So, varies I suppose.

newtlover Mon 12-Mar-18 23:52:48

I'd find it extremely wierd, but I wouldn't be offended
I'd just think she was barking

AppleKatie Mon 12-Mar-18 23:52:56

Offended? No.

I’d be slightly creeped out if my mil signed her card to my mum though. She’s not my mum (lovely as she is).

FlyingElbows Mon 12-Mar-18 23:53:35

I wouldn't be offended but I would think "aye... whatever." to myself. My mil was deeply hurt that Mr Elbows called his best friend's mother "mum" and I can totally understand why.

Stompythedinosaur Mon 12-Mar-18 23:53:51

I would find it weird. Dmil is lovely but is not my mum.

6catsandcounting Mon 12-Mar-18 23:54:13

I always called my mil mum so no problem

pawpatrolearworm Mon 12-Mar-18 23:54:47

Not offended, but I would find it really odd. I would assume it was just their family culture though.

nokidshere Mon 12-Mar-18 23:54:48

Of course not. I called my MIL by her name but she always signed cards "love from Mum". What is there to be offended by?

firawla Mon 12-Mar-18 23:55:17

My mil does refer to herself as “Mummy”! My own mum isn’t offended as she knows that’s just what she’s like and obviously knows that I haven’t replaced her with mil or anything! She just sees it as mils weird and quirky ways

PitilessYank Mon 12-Mar-18 23:56:15

I would be happy that they had a nice relationship-it wouldn't bother me at all. The more people that love my kids, the better.

MrsMaxwell Mon 12-Mar-18 23:58:09

My mum used to call my gran (her MIL) Mum, she had a fab relationship with her own Mum.

Think it’s generational.

SleightOfMind Tue 13-Mar-18 00:00:51

I hope I would be delighted she’d welcomed my child into her family so wholeheartedly.

In reality, I’d be a bit angry but would hopefully hide it well.

cariadlet Tue 13-Mar-18 00:01:09

I can't imagine signing my future son in law's card "from mum" and would find it very odd if dd's future mil signed her card "from mum", but I wouldn't be offended. I'd just find it a weird thing to do. A mil is not a mum, no matter how how great the relationship is.

MrsEricBana Tue 13-Mar-18 00:01:24

No I think I'd be pleased she thought of my dc as a new dc really ie that she welcomed them and cared about them. Having said that, would I sign a card to my dc spouse "from Mum"? No, in case their actual mum felt ousted. So...erm...dunno!

IveGotStupidHair Tue 13-Mar-18 00:02:24

My mil does this to me. My dm has seen it when nosing through cards on the mantle piece and thought it was a bit weird. I don’t think she was offended as such though. My mil also always copies out the little message printed in the card just under the printed writing. So she is quite an odd woman.

SpringEquinox Tue 13-Mar-18 00:17:34

I found it very strange that my SIL used to call my late mother Mum and write to her as that even when she was long divorced from my brother and her own mother was living and also called Mum . My PILs used to send Xmas cards with a portfolio signature adressing us all i.e. From Mother-Pa/Mary- John/Grandmama - Grandpapa

Girlfrommars77 Tue 13-Mar-18 00:18:13

Also think it’s mum called her MIL ‘mother’ sometimes and still called her mum ‘mum’ - it just showed they were close and was a name

Italiangreyhound Tue 13-Mar-18 00:40:33

Not at all. I would think it was lovely.

My parents are both dead and I've been married for almost 20 years and finally called my MIL 'mum' by accident a short while ago. It was lovely.

VladmirsPoutine Tue 13-Mar-18 00:41:27


poisoningpidgeysinthepark Tue 13-Mar-18 00:46:17

A friend of mine is always talking about 'my kids' when she means her daughter and son-in-law. It always kind of startles me, and I have to mentally go through "Kids? Have I missed something? Oh, she means her daughter and son-in-law" every time.

pawpatrolearworm Tue 13-Mar-18 00:48:43

She's always doing it yet you are always confused and need time to work it out?

poisoningpidgeysinthepark Tue 13-Mar-18 00:58:40

Yes, it still sounds alien to me. It's not that I'm stupid, it's just that there isn't anyone in my family who actually likes or respect their child's spouse, let alone considers them an honorary child - there's a lot of conflict and resentment.

WannaBeWonderWoman Tue 13-Mar-18 00:59:50

I would initially be a bit hmm but then I would give myself a slap and be very happy that she loved my child so much.

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