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AIBU?

To ask how many people have asked for a cesarean out of preference?

457 replies

VioletteValentia · 12/03/2018 07:36

I did it. I’ve never met another person who has, or who has admitted to it. I have come across people who seem convinced that supporting maternal choice would lead to everyone asking for cesareans, which I think is bullshit. Not everyone wants one!

Did you do this? Would you? Would you be more likely to if you felt the option was equally acceptable?

I’m interested in how many women feel like I did.

I shouldn’t have to say this but...no “natural v cesarean” insulting please.

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PodgeBod · 12/03/2018 07:42

With my DD1 who was breech I asked for a section rather then turning her or trying a breech birth but I think that's fairly standard. If I have a third I plan to ask for another section because of how bad I found DD2s birth.

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NewSense · 12/03/2018 07:43

I didn't plan on one for my first, but had one for medical reasons (elective, not emergency), and it was fine. Recovery was a bit painful, and slower than friends' vaginal birth recoveries.

I've been told that for my next they encourage/expect vbac, but I'm thinking of requesting another section. (might be out of my hands, of course, like last time).

I think that, on balance, a section is less risky for the baby (given my anatomy!), and so I'd opt for whatever is safest for the child, even if it's harder on my body. So yes, I'd request a section.

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SunnyCoco · 12/03/2018 07:46

I had a vaginal birth for my first baby and it was so horrendous I have requested a planned cesaerean for the next one, which will be in a few weeks time. They approved it no problem.

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SharronNeedles · 12/03/2018 07:47

If I was offered, I would say no. If I needed one, I'd tell them to crack on!
I didn't have one with DS but I was on a ward with people who did and their post-birth recovery was actually quite scary! I learned lots for those few weeks I was on the ward.
I'm a firm believer that whatever birth plan you have, whatever your preferences, they go out the window during birth. The priority is and will always be to get the baby out safely by any means possible.

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VioletteValentia · 12/03/2018 07:47

Thank you.

I opted for one for no apparent reason, I had never wanted to do it vaginally. Even before I was pregnant I knew I wanted a cesarean. I didn’t like the possibilities of labour, that it could be fine or it could be awful and I couldn’t control it. The cesarean by contrast seemed straight forward, more controlled and I knew I had doctors there in case something went wrong (vs potentially going into labour at 1am on an understaffed ward).

I also thought it’d be less painful and undignified. For me I was correct.

I’ve found very few women will admit to saying “I thought a cesarean was a better choice” but I don’t know if my view is just really uncommon.

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TroubledLichen · 12/03/2018 07:49

I did! Had DD (my first and so far only) in the UK but privately so I didn’t cost the NHS any extra money.

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PreparingToBeAMummy · 12/03/2018 07:49

Did the NHS allow you a section just because you wanted one?

I intend to request a section due to my abuse history but I keep being told it is very unlikely they will accept.

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minimonkey11 · 12/03/2018 07:49

I had an emcs for my first and then was directed down vbac. My first was induced after 2 weeks overdue and they suggested vbac with an ‘elective’ csection booked for 1 week over due. I never thought i’d get there as i was convinced my second would go into natural labour. It didnt happen so i had the csection. I guess it was elective but i was fed up by that point and didnt want a repeat of last time so i guess i chose to do it.

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Spanglybangles · 12/03/2018 07:50

I had a section first time round due to failure to progress in labour. Was induced at 12 days over and had the pessaries/tablets administered 5 times over 3 days but didn’t get further than 1cm, so ended with the c section.

With second pregnancy I was told by midwife early on that due to previous section, I would have option if vaginal delivery or another section. I chose another section as I knew what it involved and didn’t want a repeat of first birth.

I chose section just 2 days before due date and would have delivered vaginally if I had gone into spontaneous labour, but that didn’t happen.

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Snowysky20009 · 12/03/2018 07:50

Had 2 'easy' vaginal deliveries. I was petrified I would have to have a c-section. However, I think as long as mum and baby are ok, it doesn't matter which way the delivery happens.

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Somethingveryrandom · 12/03/2018 07:51

I was adamant that i did not want one. I had to have an emergency section in the end as things did not go exactly as planned.

If and when we have a second i will be having an elective section. The thought of having to go through an emergency one again makes me feel sick.

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OlivesAndWhiskey · 12/03/2018 07:51

Hi OP, I feel exactly the same as you. I'm pregnant with my first and I shall be enquiring about an elective C-section.

From your post, would I be correct to assume you were given a C-section, if so was it private or NHS? If it was NHS, did you receive a lot of resistance? I'm extremely anxious about having to fight hard for it and I've read horror stories of doctors purposely leaving it until the last minute, in hope the woman gives birth vaginally so the mother doesn't have a choice!

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VioletteValentia · 12/03/2018 07:52

Did the NHS allow you a section just because you wanted one?

Yes. They were extremely calm about it and I was told it was no problem. I did have to have a chat with someone to check I understood it, but I’d researched it and they were happy with my understanding.

That’s disgusting they are trying to discourage you. I told them vaginal birth gave me anxiety because of how unpredictable it is and that was fine.

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KadabrasSpoon · 12/03/2018 07:55

I had an emergency section with DC1. 2nd time I went elective which was a huge fight to get.
Officially it was maternal choice but I considered both options and didn't want the uncertainty and possibility of an emergency section again. DC2 also needed a transfusion at birth so also figured it safer that was scheduled in rather than a busy understaffed Saturday night etc.

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PlowerOfScotland · 12/03/2018 07:55

I had asked for one for my third, which sadly ended in miscarriage. I'm asking for one for my 4th, hopefully this pregnancy will have a happier ending.

My second birth was a shambles which took 4 days, left without my waters, ended up with us both in hospital for a week with an infection. Nurses argued whether to cover me with blankets when my temp was through the roof but I was shaking violently. Bloody chimps tea party. Never again.

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Sassyk · 12/03/2018 07:56

I had a section due to an extreme fear and anxiety of giving birth. It was a fight but they approved it in the end somewhat reluctantly after advice from a specialist midwife/psychologist. I'm aware that this was 4 years ago and this time we're likely to have to pay for it. Which I'm prepared to do, unfortunately there is little acknowledgment of mental health issues pre-natal.

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userabcname · 12/03/2018 07:56

I was really worried about having an emergency c-section before I gave birth. By the end of an extremely painful, complicated labour with lots of intervention I was literally begging for a c-section. I did manage to give birth vaginally in the end but if I have another I will be requesting a c section. I think I have good grounds to based on my first labour. My main fear with the c-section was the recovery but I found recovery from my vaginal birth extremely painful and slow so I'm prepared for that and it hugely outweighs the pain and stress of labour / birth injuries.

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KadabrasSpoon · 12/03/2018 07:56

Resistance will depend on your nhs trust and their policy. Mine had a natural birth policy

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Mathbat · 12/03/2018 07:56

I requested c section for my first birth (twins) because I didn’t want to end up having one vaginally and one by emergency c section. Had to have long chat with a senior midwife to go through the risks etc but they agreed to it no probs. I’d have asked for c section even if it had been a singleton pregnancy, but don’t know if it would have been so easy to obtain one.

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carryondoctor · 12/03/2018 08:00

I know 3 who did, and I've just gone for an elective for my second after a failed induction led to a c for my first.

My biggest terror is the baby getting stuck and being in distress and then needing an urgent emergency section - I think the elective c gives the smallest chance of that happening. For my friends it was the same sort of thing.

But there's no right/wrong way to do it, so long as you listen to your medical team and nobody else - judging you do NOT need!!

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Beetlejizz · 12/03/2018 08:02

Check out the NICE guidance preparingtobeamummy. It says that if, after you've been appropriately counselled, you still want an ELCS, you should be offered one. Sometimes this involves multiple appointments with them trying to talk you out of it, though.

Fwiw, women who kick up enough of a fuss usually seem to get one. Simply because trusts know, even if they have natural birth policies, that the law is not on their side. Read Montgomery v Lanarkshire Health Board. If once the risks have been explained and you prefer a section, that's what's supposed to happen. But you may have to go hard.

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Chrisinthemorning · 12/03/2018 08:05

I requested it. Due to my history- ivf pregnancy with history of tfmr- I was under a fetal medicine consultant.
I knew all along that was my preference and I read various books and the Nice guidelines. I’m a health professional myself (dentist) and I was prepared to argue for it endlessly. I’m probably quite a difficult patient!
Anyway I requested it at 16w and she said no, there was a much greater risk of death with a ELCS (?- whose? ). At 20 weeks she changed her mind and said that she could tell I was serious (I had requested to be sent for counselling as per Nice) and wrote ELCS maternal request 39 weeks all over my notes.
It turned out I had placenta praevia (she missed it at 20 but it was found at 24 after a bleed) so I had to have a cs anyway.
MWs are sometimes a bit funny- one tried to persuade me a vb is better when I was on for a pp bleed at 35 weeks- erm the placenta hasn’t moved love, do you want me to die?!

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VioletteValentia · 12/03/2018 08:09

did you receive a lot of resistance? I'm extremely anxious about having to fight hard for it and I've read horror stories of doctors purposely leaving it until the last minute, in hope the woman gives birth vaginally so the mother doesn't have a choice

No resistance. And I put in my plan that if I went into labour, I wanted a cesarean anyway. I did go into labour a bit early and I had a cesarean first thing two days later (I had very slow labour).

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YouCantBeSirius · 12/03/2018 08:09

I had a maternal request cesarean granted for my first baby. Almost 20 weeks pregnant now and was asked at my 16 week appointment how I would like to deliver this baby and I've been granted another cesarean. No fighting involved.

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KadabrasSpoon · 12/03/2018 08:10

Yes this ^
You may have to go hard. I had to undergo psychology sessions (I had PTSD), vbac class, consultant midwife and 3 consultants. I was seeing the consultant every fortnight anyway because of a complication. So a lot of appointments. It took until 37 weeks to get it signed off and that's with jury being out on whether a section was safest for us anyway after the previous one. Plus needing a specialist paediatrician and NHS blood and transplant present.
The guidelines got laughed off as being just guidelines. As in they don't have to follow them. Also brought in the RCOG papers on vbac Vs c section and highlighted relevant bits.
It's tough and it was stressful but got there in the end.

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