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To be annoyed that DP just spent more on a guitar than he did on my engagement ring?

(153 Posts)
thiskittenbarks Sun 25-Feb-18 22:12:01

We got engaged at Christmas so not particularly long ago. I didn't mean to look at the receipt for the ring at all but DP has a habit of leaving everything on the stairs for months on end. I was clearing the stairs recently and found a bag and almost binned it and then I thought I'd better check the receipts in there to make sure it wasn't anything important and it was the paperwork and receipt for the ring.
He already had a guitar that cost more than the ring but he's had that for years so I don't feel like I can be mad about that. But he came home with another one this weekend and when he told me how much it cost I went all funny and it was pretty obvious I was annoyed. He doesn't know I know how much the ring cost so I guess he just thinks annoyed about how much he spent on it in general. To be fair to him it was what he bought with his "birthday money". But I still feel quite peeved about it. He has 9 guitars now. I do love my ring but I feel like I'm looking at it in a different way since he came home with the new guitar. I know I shouldn't be such a princess, but I have but AIBU to be annoyed?
For context we are pretty financially comfortable but are currently looking for a new house and also planning the wedding so more savings would definitely be useful. We have been together 10 years and have 1 DC and another on the way.
I might go and buy myself a ridiculously extravagant present for my birthday next week!

PiningForTheFjords Sun 25-Feb-18 22:15:08

Do you really love your engagement ring?

If yes, it doesn't really matter what it cost relative to anything else, and the guitar was bought with his birthday money,

alpineibex Sun 25-Feb-18 22:16:06

He already has 9 guitars. YANBU.

But then again, taking the ring out of it, I would think my DP WBU if he had 9 guitars in the first place.

QualityDogWrangler2 Sun 25-Feb-18 22:17:03

He loves guitars, buy yourself something you’d like, or a better ring, but don’t go mad for the sake of it, just if you’d prefer a better one.

ThomasHardyPerennial Sun 25-Feb-18 22:17:55

He can do what he likes with his birthday money! You are being ridiculous. What are you going to do- have a competition every single year on who can spend the most on their birthday? Grow up.

Alanna1 Sun 25-Feb-18 22:21:16

Well for me, I think diamonds are overpriced nonsense anyway. It is a de beers marketing campaign that people should spend x times their salaries. But you obviously do mind and that’s what matters.
However I wouldn’t like that number of guitars.

upsideup Sun 25-Feb-18 22:23:22

Are you marrying him for his money?

Loz604 Sun 25-Feb-18 22:23:58

My DP has a hobby of building a race car and parts of his car he has spent more on than what he’s ever spend on a ring for me- it’s his money. The price of your engagement ring has nothing to do with your worth- especially if it was a fair priced ring anyway and you love it.

With a baby on the way could you be feeling a little sensitive?

Saying this we are not as financially comfortable as I’d like to be and would possibly begrudge another guitar! But it’s his money I guess

loobybear Sun 25-Feb-18 22:24:20

To be honest i think YAB a bit U because a guitar has a purpose and the quality of guitar and the standard to which it can achieve that purpose can correlate with the cost of them whereas a ring is a ring. Some might look nicer than others but one than costs more doesn't necessarily look any better. Although i have to admit that my dad was a professional guitarist so I grew up in a house full of guitars, 9 might sound like a lot but i know that it's likely that each has a different sound and purpose.

LizzieSiddal Sun 25-Feb-18 22:24:21

Do you like the ring?

My Dh “collects” guitars, if he wants to buy one, I also go and buy something I really want/like. It’s only fair.

WhatsGoingOnEh Sun 25-Feb-18 22:24:33

My mum's engagement ring cost £15 in the 60s and they've been happily married ever since. I know how you feel, but it's honestly not important.

It's not a reflection of your own personal "worth". Don't fall into the trap of feeling like it is.,

MyBrilliantDisguise Sun 25-Feb-18 22:25:42

Are you marrying him for his money?

Don't be stupid!

Gemini69 Sun 25-Feb-18 22:25:42

is he in KISS or the Rolling Stones hmm why does he need 9 guitars ?

CoughArghCoughArghCough Sun 25-Feb-18 22:26:09

Eek OP, you might be about to marry my husband... grin
DH spent more on a new guitar for himself than on our wedding rings combined, and it didn't bother me at all because the rings are beautiful and have a special meaning for us. I wouldn't love them any more if they'd cost double what the guitar did. And he could afford the guitar at that point bloody couldn't now

I would focus on the sentimental value rather than financial value, but also definitely buy yourself an extravagant present because being married to a guitar nut you absolutely deserve it!

parklives Sun 25-Feb-18 22:26:37

I think £15 in the 60's was a good chunk of money what

BoneyBackJefferson Sun 25-Feb-18 22:27:33

why does he need 9 guitars

different types of guitar? different makes of have a different tone to them.

Skarossinkplunger Sun 25-Feb-18 22:28:47

Christ on a bike, you sound ungrateful. Next your birthday present won’t have cost enough, then your Christmas present. Sounds like the poor guy is going to spend his entire marriage trying to please you.,

thiskittenbarks Sun 25-Feb-18 22:30:17

@upsideup I earn more than him so, nope not marrying him for his money.

JustAnotherPoster00 Sun 25-Feb-18 22:30:24

He'll always have his guitars, not sure you'll always be around with an attitude like that if he has any sense hmm

PinkAvocado Sun 25-Feb-18 22:30:42

I think YABU. Both times it was his money. The guitar was partially paid for with gift money so therefore partly a gift.

gamerchick Sun 25-Feb-18 22:31:04

As he’s really into guitars he probably doesn’t care how much it cost. I am curious in the difference in price though.

Justmuddlingalong Sun 25-Feb-18 22:31:06

He bought the latest guitar with birthday money, so YABU. Did he get an engagement ring?

PeaPodPopper Sun 25-Feb-18 22:32:54

* I do love my ring but I feel like I'm looking at it in a different way since he came home with the new guitar*
^ Comparison is the thief of joy, Op.

I might go and buy myself a ridiculously extravagant present for my birthday next week
^ Oh please, do grow up.

Yes, you ARE being a princess. Are you going to measure everything by it's price, throughout your life? Being materialistic means you'll never be satisfied.
Celebrate the ring you say you love, and what it represents - the future with your DP.......not how much money you THINK he should spend on you.

BishBoshBashBop Sun 25-Feb-18 22:33:18

You sound like hard work tbh.

Gemini69 Sun 25-Feb-18 22:34:48

I earn more than him so, nope not marrying him for his money

are you going to finance his future guitars flowers

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