Feel they're going to take my child [sad]

AlwaysMeAlwaysWrong · 2018-02-21 12:41:14

I have a DD, whose nearly 3 and has a number of issues. As a result of that we have a Social Worker who isn't from child protection who comes to see us every few months to make sure I'm getting all the support I need, and to make sure that there's nothing DD needs. I've always co-operated with her, and even if I've felt something was stupid I've done it, she contacts DDs Health Visitor who is also brilliant (she's a specialist disability HV) and I see her regularly. I've recently come off a course of Antidepressants. I started them when DD was 9 months old, had counselling for a few months at that time and have stayed on the tablets until now. I made a GPs appointment, who agreed with me that I was ready to come off the tablets, it was controlled, we cut down to half a tablet once a day (was on one tablet everyday before then, they were low dosage anyway, 15mg) then half a tablet every other day, then once a week, then off completely. I have been fine in myself, sleeping fine and I've got DD to all her appointments, kept in touch with GP in all that time, whose agreed I'm doing well. I mentioned to my Social Worker how well I was doing , how I was off the tablets and I was so proud of myself for doing it without them. I have a DH but he works long hours so I often have to manage DD on my own. I also work 3 days a week, DD attends a local nursery where she's doing well, if slow progress. Social Worker has accused me of neglect and that she has to report it to CP. Apparently I'll be investigated and told to go back on my tablets. I have called my GP and she's written a letter to say that SW can call her to discuss it. GP has always said she thinks my parenting is the best it can be in the circumstances, tells me I'm doing a great job and says that when she's seen DD there is nothing that would concern her about her - she's fed, always has clean clothes, is as happy as any 2 year old can be, has only missed 2 days of Nursery since September due to D+V which was going round (6 others in her room had been or where off with it at the time), and we put her in the Nursery at 14 months old as I needed to return to work. The Nursery is rated outstanding by ofsted, well regarded in the local community, DD loves it and they do lots of interesting and varied activities that I could never do with DD. Working is my sanity away from the madness that is toddlerhood plus DDs conditions. But according to the SW the letter doesn't matter, and I should of told her/my HV that I wanted to come off the tablets and they'd make a decision as to whether I was ready - I didn't realise they could assess my mental health. I feel so horrible, like I've committed an awful crime and my punishment is losing my DD. I don't feel down, or anxious or any of my depression symptoms, just like a criminal. I thought I'd done the right thing getting myself well for my DD, working and providing, but I apparently haven't. I have always put my DD first; she has clothes when she needs new clothes, I do use a mixture of secondhand and new, she has brand new shoes when she needs them, I always use a proper fitting shop (not clarks but similar) on the recommendation of one of her consultants, she's always fed, and her weight is consistent and following the line, I get her weighed regularly (every 3-5 months but she's often weighed in between by various consultants), she goes swimming, to toddler groups and soft play and also has play dates with her same aged cousin and Nursery friends when not in Nursery/at appointments. She's missed one appointment in nearly 3 years because she was on ITU and there was no way she could attend, I let the department know but it still went down as a DNA, I stayed by her side on ITU, only swapping with DH so he could do an overnight and I could go home and have a shower and a proper meal - surely that's fine? DH is her dad and is on her birth certificate. I've never ever done anything but put her first, after the bills the small amount we need to put towards the Nursery bills (she gets think 2 funding due to being on DLA) gets paid, then she gets everything she needs food wise then me and DH - She eats fruit, and veg and has a fairly health diet, she only drinks water or milk apart from once a week when my MIL has her and gives her a cup of ribena (who am I to deny a grandma a treat to her only grandchild?). The dentist said her teeth are perfect at her last check up and I clearly make sure her teeth are brushed every single day - I do without fail, we don't leave the house in the morning unless her teeth are brushed and she can't go to bed until they're done again. She's disciplined within her understanding - we use a countdown to give her time to change her mind and then take action so if she doesn't stop doing what we don't want she gets put in her room to reflect for 2 minutes (exactly what the Nursery do and the HV has said is perfect for her age and understanding), if we're out and about she gets put in the pushchair and then after the 2 minutes whether home or outside we tell her what she's done wrong and make her say sorry. If she does it again, she will be made to stay in the pushchair or at home will lose whatever it is she's doing/breaking and can earn it back. Again been told this is perfect by the HV. I just don't know what else I could of done. I've tried my best but my best isn't good enough. The GP told me not to panic and she'd sort it, she said she still thinks I am ready to be off the tablets and is sticking by her decision to support me, her methodology is apparently not to medicate any condition unless necessary and she believes patients know they're own minds/bodies better than she ever will so if it's in their best interests she will support them to be medication free.

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We're taking this one down so that we can have a look behind the scenes and clear a couple of things up with OP.