Have n/c, this is LONG and also a few years old but has been playing on my mind recently so am putting it out to the MN jury: which of us was being the most U? (I accept we were probably all at least a bit unreasonable).
The Cast
Me: Lives with boyfriend in studio flat (relevant because we don’t have space for guests)
"Gabby": Long-time family friend who lives abroad
My mum: Has form for inconveniencing entire family (I grew up in a very small 3 bed/1 bath flat) to accommodate guests (she once dragged my dad to stay in a neighbour’s spare room for a week so the daughter of a long-lost friend and her BF could stay in their bedroom)
Younger DB: Living at home post-uni, golden child
The Story
Gabby was visiting London with a new boyfriend (who none of us had ever met) because he was attending a conference. Plan was they’d stay in BF's hotel for 3 nights, he’d fly home and Gabby would stay 1 extra night in my old room at my parents. But at some point, apparently, my mum said in passing to Gabby's mum "she can stay as long as she wants" so just 3 days before the conference Gabby and her BF cancel their hotel and decide to stay at my parents for the whole trip so they can “go mental on spending on other stuff” (actual quote). Except they didn't bother to tell my mum (we only found out when I texted Gabby to ask when she was coming).
Now, I was annoyed because it was my birthday during their stay and after a rough few years (life-changing illness + workplace bullying) my mum knew that all I wanted was a small dinner at home with family only. But if Gabby and her BF were staying obviously they’d have to be invited (even my best friend wasn’t invited btw).
DB was also annoyed, because he a) had stuff planned at home and b) wasn’t comfortable with a stranger (Gabby’s BF) staying.
Despite us both explaining this to our mum, she refused to ask Gabby to go back to the original plan. So DB asked me for Gabby’s mum’s number to ask her to ask Gabby (NO idea why he didn’t call Gabby herself btw). I told him he shouldn't (I knew our mum would be pissed off) but figured he’s an adult and it’s up to him what he does so I gave him her number.
Her mum was obviously really upset and Gabby wasn’t happy but she rebooked her hotel. However my mum was furious - with me - and gave me the silent treatment all through my birthday. When I pointed out it was DB who’d made the phone call she said it was my fault for giving him the number.
And when my mum met up with Gabby’s mum a few months later, she apparently laid all the blame for everything on me to her as well (and not DB).
So I put it to the MN jury - who was the most U?
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AIBU?
Who was being the most unreasonable?
21 replies
ConfessionsOfTeenageDramaQueen · 20/02/2018 19:54
OP posts:
Perendinate ·
20/02/2018 20:19
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