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AIBU?

To think that ex-parents of a school should help fundraise?

21 replies

mrsmootoo · 13/02/2018 19:00

My children have now left our local state secondary. They did well there and I was involved in the PTA. I would be happy to be contacted by the school/current PTA to see if I could make donations occasionally (this hasn't happened yet, they are wondering whether to). School budgets are so tight nowadays, and (selfishly in terms of house prices etc!) it's better for me to have a good local secondary school with good facilities on my doorstep than a rundown school. Other ex-parents I've mentioned it to are horrified at the idea and feel they've put school all behind them now (even if they could afford to make small donations). Any thoughts welcome.

OP posts:
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treaclesoda · 13/02/2018 19:02

I left school 25 years ago and my parents still get begging letters from my old school Hmm

Personally I think that once your child has left, they should stop asking for money. If you want to donate voluntarily there's nothing to stop you doing so, but I think for a school or PTA to actually ask once your children have left is very cheeky.

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NNchangedforthis · 13/02/2018 19:04

I would donate in terms of attending events, buying stuff from school fun days.
I would not like a phone call just asking for a donation.

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NewYearNewMe18 · 13/02/2018 19:08

In my experience, the PTA stays in situ until death, they hand on by the fingernails!

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jay55 · 13/02/2018 19:12

I wish my old school would reach out to alumni for money, they might be surprised.

My university does all the time, but obviously they have a budget to do this and it is a long standing tradition, where it isn’t for state schools.

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Scribblegirl · 13/02/2018 19:16

My private secondary school went bust so I'm guessing they didn't do this 😂

I used to fundraise for my uni when I was a student. Sadly between flat buying, wedding and trying to build up savings I'm not able to pay back yet. No sure if I would due to the insane VC salary but I do accept education budgets are under so much pressure nowadays.

I would have assumed though that the fundraising would come from alumni, not former parents?

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MincemeatTart · 13/02/2018 19:26

Yes the independent sector are far more robust in their ongoing communication with alumni and ex parents. Lots of events, Christmas cards, newsletters, an Old pupils society, career networks, yearbooks etc.

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JenniferYellowHat1980 · 13/02/2018 19:37

Our primary had a promise auction last year at the local pub. A lot was raised and not just by parents. The Christmas bingo is a good one too. There are other ways to get the community to contribute than asking directly.

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Peachyking000 · 13/02/2018 19:46

Yes. Especially re the schools that use having a parent as an ex-pupil as a criterion for admission

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brizzledrizzle · 13/02/2018 19:49

YABU, parents tend to only support schools when they have children there. I have no interest whatsoever in supporting my DCs former schools; that is for the current parents.

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bigbluebus · 13/02/2018 19:53

We supported the schools our DCs were at when they pupils there. As far as I'm aware, the schools still have the same number of pupils so roughly the same number of parents who can continue that support. Why would you need to ask ex-parents to give to the school? I agree that fund raising events in the community that can be attended by the public are a good way of widening the reach for money but I would be a bit miffed to get 'begging' letter from my DCs ex schools requesting money. And as we're supporting DS through University we don't have any spare cash to give.

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AuntieStella · 13/02/2018 19:54

"Yes. Especially re the schools that use having a parent as an ex-pupil as a criterion for admission"

That could only be a factor in private school admissions, and I think they tend to harass stay in touch with alumni as a matter of routine.

I feel that I did my bit for fundraising when I was a parent at a school. I don't think I'd like to be targeted as a 'belonger' once I'd moved on. But I think the idea that school fundraising events could be targeted at the whole local community is a really good one.

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Leiaorganashair · 13/02/2018 19:55

Surely they'll be busy fundraising for their DC's secondary, by that logic?

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redexpat · 13/02/2018 19:56

Yabu. Schools should be properly funded in the first place.

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Peachyking000 · 13/02/2018 19:58

AuntieStella it’s used in quite a few grammar schools too, unfortunately

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AuntieStella · 13/02/2018 20:04

If a school is using that as a criterion, then I think it should be challendpged, because the admissions code says that priority must not be given on the basis if the parents' education

"f) give priority to children according to the occupational, marital, financial or educational status of parents applying. The exceptions to this are children of staff at the school and those eligible for the early years pupil premium, the pupil premium and the service premium who may be prioritised in the arrangements in accordance with paragraphs 1.39 – 1.39B;"

(apologies if that's nit the most recent version, but I'm pretty sure this POV that nit changed since that iteration)

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OutyMcOutface · 13/02/2018 20:06

It's a form of entitlement. Where I went to school (private sector) it was common for families/allumi to continue making donations for fundraisers, attend fundraising events, to fund decidicated scholarships (especially in memorandum) and, bequeath lump sums in their wills. Maybe it's because some students/families were very grateful for the service the school provided (in a way they may not have at a less than brilliant state school) or maybe it is because they were very much aware of the cost of a good education so more likely to choose to make their usual charitable donation to the school.

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Peachyking000 · 13/02/2018 20:07

Thanks AuntieStella, I agree it should not be used, and that info might be useful for an appeal (stressed parent here waiting to find out what school their child will be going to)

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Judashascomeintosomemoney · 13/02/2018 20:07

My DDs school benefits from an involved network of ‘old girls’, not just financially, ex pupils (some going back to the 50/60s) recently got quite vocally involved in an issue the school was facing. It isn’t an independent school either, it’s a state school. It originally opened in the nineteenth century and is a girls’ school, wonder if those two things have had an influence somehow in alumni staying involved, not sure how but maybe. Because of its history, the school is very much a part of the wider community and its ongoing existence seems to be important to local people even those who don’t have DDs there.

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Pluckedpencil · 13/02/2018 20:41

I think if you want to do it right, you have to do it like the independent sector and make the alumni feel special, i.e. annual reports, the odd mention or hark back on Facebook, just some sort of continual communication and interest in alumni, I think in general though that would be a fantastic idea and would open up all sorts of other doors, other than just hard cash. Thinking e.g. more participation in work experience schemes, more career talks, a better communication channel with the community etc... I would say it should be targeted directly at the alumni though and it would probably need a paid full time staff roll to manage it, like a development officer in a university.

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ScattyCharly · 13/02/2018 20:46

School should set up just giving pages for specific projects. Put it on banners near school then anyone who wants to give, can.

Eg we need £2000 for the playground
And different project page
We need £200 for football team kit

I think people would give to specific things more readily than general school funds

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AlexanderHamilton · 13/02/2018 20:48

Sadly ds’s current school doesn’t even have a PTA. I recently made a donation for equipment for their school show & they were a bit flummoxed.

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