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Do you take your 12/13 year olds phone away at night?

(173 Posts)
honeylulu Mon 12-Feb-18 20:42:57

Just that ... parents of 12-13 year olds Do you take your child's phone off then at night?
We take ours off him at 9pm (more like 10 or 10.30pm as we often only remember when we are going to bed). He says no one else's mum and dad do this.
Are we too strict? Or is it usual to allow overnight phone in room at this age?

cardibach Mon 12-Feb-18 20:44:34

I don’t know about parents, but I work in a boarding school and our policy is all phones handed in at night up to the end of Y9.

AmberTopaz Mon 12-Feb-18 20:45:03

My 12yo leaves his downstairs charging at night.

NumbersLetters Mon 12-Feb-18 20:45:33

We take our dd's (14). She'd be on it literally all night if we didn't. Some of her friends mums do the same, I don't think it's unusual.

SavageBeauty73 Mon 12-Feb-18 20:46:03

I don't. Nearly 13 year old twins. They don't go on their phones after 10pm. I do check every now and again.

fallenblossom Mon 12-Feb-18 20:46:13

Yes. I take my 12 year olds at 8pm. She accepts why I do. Weekends I am more flexible.

mum11970 Mon 12-Feb-18 20:47:04


Shesaysso Mon 12-Feb-18 20:47:21

Yr 8 Dd - yes it has to be downstairs charging by 9pm.

MarmaladeIsMyJam Mon 12-Feb-18 20:47:32

Nope. Both my older children are pretty good at self regulating.

BewareOfDragons Mon 12-Feb-18 20:48:20


They must be downstairs (charging) for the night. No excuses. So are ours (mine and DH's) to be fair.

AssetRichIncomePoor Mon 12-Feb-18 20:49:30

Yes, yes, yes. DC5 is nearly 14. I take her phone at 9.30 as I go to bed at 10. Have also insisted that XH have the same regime at his house. I do let her have it at night in the school holidays, though.

I trawl intermittently through her phone once she hands it in, and when I can be bothered to. She knows the deal (namely I pay for the phone, so I have the right to trawl through it when I want. Which is not often, but she needs to know that this is the deal).

Older DC are not at home. DC4 is boarding, so is at home in the holidays. But he doesn't have a smartphone or any other device, so it isn't an issue.

RicottaPancakes Mon 12-Feb-18 20:49:38

I can't see why they would need a phone when they are asleep......

PlanNumber Mon 12-Feb-18 20:49:40

I don't allow phones upstairs at any time of day (for any of us, that's only fair) and mine are almost 15 & 17!

I don't have a routine of taking them away, I don't need to the know that if they get caught with them upstairs they will lose them.

umberellaonesie Mon 12-Feb-18 20:49:58

Yes and my 17 year old still leaves his phone down stairs over night (by choice).
I hope because we instilled the good habit of him not having his phone in his bedroom from a young age.

Petalflowers Mon 12-Feb-18 20:50:03

Mine are older teens and their phones have to be downstairs overnight. Older teen is okay, but younger teen (15 years) would be on it all night. On the occasions he does take it to bed, he’s noticeably more argumentative the next day.

Saltandsauce Mon 12-Feb-18 20:50:05

Yep 13 year olds phone and MacBook get put downstairs at 9.45pm on a school night. I’m not as strict at weekends, but when we head to bed, we make him put his stuff in the hall (it’s usually around 11pm-12).
I couldn’t trust that he would come off it! I hear it pinging away after he’s brought it down though so obvs his friends parents aren’t as strict, but I don’t care!! Xxx

Petalflowers Mon 12-Feb-18 20:50:53

I also physically don’t remove them, they have to bring them downstairs.

SweetMoon Mon 12-Feb-18 20:51:03

Yes. Phones are left downstairs to charge at night.

Kay1966 Mon 12-Feb-18 20:51:13

Really, a child insisting that everybody else's parents doesn't do x and that you're mean and very strict has you questioning your parenting?
<hollow laugh>
Give it a few more years grin
Seriously OP. You're doing fine.
My dd (13) has her phone taken from her at 5pm and it's given to her again as she is leaving the house to go to school.
She can change that fact when she gets a job and pays the bill.

mamaduckbone Mon 12-Feb-18 20:51:15

Yes. Our 12yo leaves his downstairs when he goes to bed and isn’t really allowed on it after 8pm.

user1486076969 Mon 12-Feb-18 20:51:24

As per cardibach, phones and laptops handed in up to (and including) year 11. As a result I must admit that when he's at home I'm not very good at restricting access!

Wallywobbles Mon 12-Feb-18 20:52:24

We use OurPact and it turns off all the apps etc at 7.30pm.

DeleteOrDecay Mon 12-Feb-18 20:53:22

Mine aren't there yet but we absolutely plan to do this with phones and tablets. I think it's good parenting.

user1486076969 Mon 12-Feb-18 20:54:01

I use mine as my clock and alarm clock so would be very hypocritical is I removed DS phone during holidays.

ViceAdmiralAmilynHoldo Mon 12-Feb-18 20:56:10

Laptops and phones are charged downstairs. Three pre-GCSE secondary school kids.
We have a formal time of 7.30pm which often stretches to 8.30.

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