Dp and I have been together for coming up to 9 years, moved in together about 5 months after getting together.
He's always been more or less the same, apart from maybe the first year when he was a gentleman personified.
We both work full time, he is usually home before I am.
Firstly, he does nothing around the house. Absolutely nothing. When I ask him to do anything, he does it so badly or makes more of a mess that I tend not to ask him much.
Secondly, he plays a foreign lottery. He wins frequently, a few times a month, always between £200 and £2000. Sometimes he doesn't tell m he's won, but if he does, he never shares. He'll usually say he will put some away towards a break, but never will offer me any cash even if he knows it's the end of the month and a financial struggle for me. Which gets me onto my next point. I'm quite sensible with money and usually fine at the end of the month, but occasionally, nasty unexpected bits come up that swallow my hard earned cash. Like this month. Dp has a savings account with around £4000 in and so a few days ago I asked him if I could please borrow £40 from his savings to tide me over for 5 days til pay day and I'd immediately repay my debt to him. He refused saying that because his work was quiet (he's self-employed) he might need his savings and gave me a huge lecture on how I should be more careful to stretch my money to last. I was and am really quite upset.
These are just a few issues that are really making me very resentful of him and for the first time ever, I find myself looking at other men and fancying them. When he walks in, I feel so resentful of him that I feel angry and have a ball of negative feeling in my chest. I know it's probably come to its natural end but AIBU?
AIBU?
To resent DP?
HannaPintura · 10/02/2018 19:48
Oh god. Your update make him sound even worse.
He tolerates your illness. What a prince among men 
Because I love him Gertrude. He's not all bad. .
Oh FFS, posts like this make me want to scream and any sympathy I might have had has just run out.
How can you genuinely love someone who treats you so badly, you might be infatuated, it might be lust (do you honestly enjoy sex with this horrible sounding man) - but please, have some self esteem, leave him, learn to love and respect yourself and if you get involved with someone else make sure they love and respect YOU.
So if i read your first post right, you've lived together for nearly 9 years but he doesn't share the housework or his money. He is 'kind at times' and 'tolerates' your illness but does sod all to help you out?
It sounds like he wants all the trappings of a committed relationship without putting any of the effort in. A nice text here and there is cute, but actions say an awful lot too.
LTB. You deserve so much more. 
He is a lazy dick and you are his personal slave. He should've gave you £40 ffs.
He tolorates your illness? Oh he's a keeper then.
LTB. Then move nearer to work so you don't have the daft commute and will be less exhausted.
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