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AIBU?

Half term - how much do you plan for a 12 & 14 year old

28 replies

Shaddyuppayaface · 10/02/2018 11:34

Until recently I always made sure I planned outings & activities for the kids in the holidays and would take time off work. However, they're now at the stage that they can safely be left home alone for a few hours while I work and have started to moan if I suggest a trip to a museum or something! The 12 year old is quite good at making plans With friends while the 14 year old, who is more introverted,will happily mooch round the house watching tv/gaming. Therefore, apart from one day out, I've planned absolutely nothing for them. I will go to work, their dad is around most of the week but tends to do diy rather than take them anywhere. However, am now feeling a bit guilty as 12 year old hasn't arranged to see any friends (though still time I guess) although 14 year old has amazingly invited a friend round for a gaming session one day.

If you have kids this age, what do they do in the holidays?

OP posts:

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CraftyGin · 10/02/2018 11:36

Absolutely nothing.

ArsenalsPlayingAtHome · 10/02/2018 11:39

Watching with interest, OP.

I worry about my 12yo and get where you're coming from with this.

dimsum123 · 10/02/2018 11:39

Nothing. 14 year old makes her own plans and is always out with friends. 12 year old stays home more but always keeps himself busy. I love it!

WinonaIsHot · 10/02/2018 11:39

Nothing at all.

Pompom42 · 10/02/2018 11:41

I’ve been thinking about this myself recently although I have a 12 year old and a baby so a little different

Shaddyuppayaface · 10/02/2018 11:42

Awww dimsum. I used to love our days out but they don't seem to appreciate them these days!

OP posts:

youarenotkiddingme · 10/02/2018 11:44

Not much! Ds is 13 with asd so isn't keen on days out to crowded places and needs the downtime to cope with the next term!

He games online but won't go out and about and meet friends either.

Luckily his swimming club still train during the holidays so we have some routine and reason to leave the house!

Ohyesiam · 10/02/2018 11:46

Dd is 13 and she has a mixture of sleepovers and rehearsals. She arranged the sleepovers.
Ds is 10 and objects to leaving the house, which I can't see improving with age.

gillybeanz · 10/02/2018 11:46

I plan a few things when dd 14 is n holiday as she has no friends in our area.
She likes spending time with family and family friends, so I organise a few visits.
We go shopping, out for coffee, maybe cinema or a show.
Mine is a boarder though and sees friends all the time at school, liking a bit more of a chill out at home during the holidays.

SprinkleCakeLollipop · 10/02/2018 11:46

I try and plan one thing at least, cinema etc

Mine are fairly unsociable and happy to mooch at home. Miserable buggers

Chasingsquirrels · 10/02/2018 11:51

Mine are 12 & 15. I'm not with their father and we split holidays 50/50, as a result I've always taken time off when they are with me and worked extra when they are with their dad.

They were off yesterday and we went out for lunch with Grandma and did a but of shopping for stuff they needed, then 15yo saw his girlfriend and 12yo dud some homework.

They are now with their dad till Wed evening.

We are going to Bletchley Park next Saturday which they were both keen on when I suggested it but other than that don't have any plans.

Thunderblunder · 10/02/2018 11:51

I don't plan anything over a week half term. My teenagers use it as a chance to do nothing and just recharge their batteries. Having said that
DD17 is working some of the days and DD15 is going to the cinema with her friends one of the days. DS14 and DS13 haven't planned anything and will probably spend the week on their X boxes.

GeorgeHerbert · 10/02/2018 11:53

I plan just one day out with ds - a mix of his and my choice. If we do it in the middle of the week he's happy having days to mooch and see friends.

Rainboho · 10/02/2018 11:55

I try to think of places to take them out, but I have home moochers too. I am as well, so that suits me. However I get the guilts that I should be trying harder!

DD nearly 12 will arrange a couple of things to do with friends, but her most favourite day in the holidays is pyjama day, when I let both DDs laze around in pyjamas and eat/watch/do what they want. Its a permanent holiday fixture and they really look forward to it!

BeyondThePage · 10/02/2018 11:56

mine are 15 and 17 - mocks coming up - there will be lots of revision and a couple of trips to town - neither of which I will be expected to have any involvement in at all.

From about age 12 holidays became less about what WE want to do and more about seeing to themselves. They will let you know if they want to do anything - just let them know that you are open to them doing that.

Tiredmum100 · 10/02/2018 11:59

I'd leave them to it. Growing up we'd have some days out with our family planned, but mainly it would be arranging to meet up with friends a cousins. We'd get up to all sorts (nothing bad).

Onlyoldontheoutside · 10/02/2018 12:05

Just one day out shopping and lunch,will also be seeing what's on in the cinema.

Peachyking000 · 10/02/2018 12:15

I arrange 1 or 2 trips, eg trip to nearest city for day out/theatre, but I find as DS gets older he likes more time mooching about the house and gaming, as our normal week is so busy

GodShaveTheQueen · 10/02/2018 12:16

They faff around on devices/X Box. One sees friends, if they can all manage to organise themselves. That's about it, really.

Shaddyuppayaface · 10/02/2018 13:52

Thanks all. Glad to hear this is normal - don't feel so guilty now! Come to think of it, I never did much at that age, didn't want to and welcomed the opportunity to mooch around the house, didn't have the wealth of home entertainment they have today either. Might get a couple of VHS films from the video shop if I could be bothered!

Now I'm an adult I always feel the need to get out and do something if I have a day off. Had clearly forgotten what it's like to be 14!

OP posts:

maddiemookins16mum · 10/02/2018 14:07

DD is 14 in April. We have nothing planned at all for this week.
She'll sleep late, do some school work, read loads, see her friends etc. The most we'll do is a half price cinema trip on Wed afternoon and a burger afterwards.

I pretty much stopped any major organising of activities once she went to senior school. In fact she's 'home alone' all day Tuesday and has a friend coming over for lunch (she's making pancakes I'm told).

Brokenbiscuit · 10/02/2018 14:09

DD is 12. I have got time off work for half term but nothing specific planned at the moment.

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SavageBeauty73 · 10/02/2018 14:11

Nothing!

I've persuaded them to come to the cinema and Nando's with me on Monday and other than that we have no other plans. How life has changed.

dimsum123 · 10/02/2018 14:12

Yes I used to enjoy days out when they were younger, museums, parks, swimming etc. But they are becoming more and more independent now, and making their own plans which I am pleased about. We still do things together, just not as much as we used to.

lljkk · 10/02/2018 14:12

DS is 13. He likes video games but also gets lonely if on his own too much. Just went to library & shopping & for chips. Tomorrow we're planning a country walk; he'll talk my ear off about star wars or somesuch.

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