I’ve had problems with my in laws since DC came along. I don’t want to drip feed but there’s so much to this story and I don’t want to bore you all. They don’t have any respect for me as a mother, they always know best and the minute my back is turned, they do everything with DC that we ask them not to. Through all of this, I still take the children to see them and still have them come to stay with us.
Anyway, DD1 is now 4 and is very emotionally intelligent (I think that’s the best way to explain it). It’s always been difficult because if I asked her not to do something, MIL & FIL would then encourage her to do it and laugh about it, which in turn would encourage her more. DH and I have both asked them not to do this but they say they can’t help it
I sat DD down and explained to her that her grandparents love her very much but sometimes they laugh when she’s misbehaving and that laughing when people misbehave isn’t a good thing to do. I explained that none of us are perfect and this is just something the her grandparents do which in an ideal world, they shouldn’t really. I told her that I know it’s confusing for her but when they laugh, it doesn’t mean she should keep doing what she’s doing. She needs to listen to what I’m telling her and that I’ll keep her right.
Anyway, today she told me she doesn’t want them to visit now because she doesn’t like that they laugh at her when she’s misbehaving. I now feel awful and like I’ve handled this the wrong way. What should I do now? I’ve tried to reassure her but it doesn’t seem to be working.
Part of me is frustrated that I’m in this position. I’m defending them when I know there’s no way on gods earth they’d ever defend me. I should be able to talk to them like adults and not have to involve DD in it at all. How do I move forward from here?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
To feel like I’m turning DD against her grandparents?
100 replies
CaveWomaan · 09/02/2018 11:00
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.