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Addicted to technology... something I really want to get off my chest

(17 Posts)
WorkingMumOnTheGo Wed 07-Feb-18 16:06:46

Hi everyone. I already know that I am being really unreasonable after you've read this! I know this is probably a random thread but just lately this has really started to go round and round in my head about just how addictive technology has become.

Of course we probably know, because we are addicted to it too! Admittedly, I am. I have been told so many times I am addicted to my phone by my OH and I always deny it but why am I denying it? It's the truth. Every waking moment, I am checking Instagram and Daily Mail. Instead I should be getting up, making a coffee and start the chores while my LO eats his breakfast. After I come out the shower, I am checking my phone while sitting down on the bed in my wet towel! What the F am I even looking at?! I think I need to delete Instagram as well at this rate. I use it for food inspirations usually, I have nobody I know personally on there but the addiction is still there.

I have not got Facebook (the best things I have ever deleted simply cos I was REALLY addicted to it and thought that was the problem), but I still have the urge to check my phone, reloading emails, WhatsApp, wondering who will be messaging me just to have a decent convo but the matter of fact is, nobody bothers about me and probably talk to me because it is easy to do so on WhatsApp. If my OH asks something, I whip my phone out and Google it... but whatever it is, really is NOT that important. It's just another excuse to go on my damn phone sadangry

I just feel huge regret that instead of doing majority of my uni work and getting amazing rewards for it (brilliant grades for example!), and spending extra time with my little boy and enjoying life and adventures but instead, I just go straight in my bed when my LO goes to sleep and go on my phone.. That's the first thing I do, but the washing up and cleaning and my work needs doing! I just go on Netflix sometimes or just simply Googling anything to read. What has it got to offer to us? I just don't understand the concept of it and why I am doing it to myself and my family.

Push has come to shove because I've really had enough of it. I have had enough of doing it to myself and wasting the time we have because life just goes by so quickly. I have a family and a little one and I beat myself up and just want to hate myself for going on my phone when I should have been focusing my extra special time with him! I do spend time with him, don't get me wrong... Just not enough! I could do better and I need to be a better Mum.

It will be evening soon when he comes home and the first thing I will be doing is putting my phone away, play with LO, cook dinner and then do my revision and assignments for the rest of the evening and then go bed to SLEEP. I am going to find some good books to read as well and start reading again in the evening as well to wind down and catch up on my programmes on my phone when I don't have any commitments. I am going to reset my phone back to basic after backing up my photos and videos which I am currently doing, and start from scratch.

If someone urgently needs me that much, they can simply call me. I can't do this anymore. I have time to change it, and now it is time that I do! When I am at work, my phone will be staying in my locker.

My work probably slacks because I am going on it during my shift.. how pathetic is that. I just feel ridiculous. I am 26 and acting like a young, petulant child. No more now!

Wellfuckmeinbothears Wed 07-Feb-18 16:17:56

Hi op,

Technology is seriously addictive isn't it? I've started trying to reduce my screen time by not having my phone when I'm eating or working. I work from home on my laptop and have banned myself from looking at facebook on it! I also put my phone and laptop away an hour before bed and read a book so I start to wind down.

Well done you for recognising it has become a problem for you and taking steps to reduce your phone time.

WorkingMumOnTheGo Wed 07-Feb-18 16:33:38

@Wellfuckmeinbothears absolutely and phone and eating is also a big thing for me. I just have a gander now and again while my dinner is "cooling down". Thinking back on it now, it really is pathetic isn't it?! It's shocking. I don't know what it is that has made me say enough is enough but it really is! I have about an hour left to pick my LO up then the fun and chores begin. My family, my house, my work is far more important. I am not giving it up completely (as in it becomes scarce lmao), how will I be able to research otherwise lol! But there's definitely a limitation.

AmiU Wed 07-Feb-18 16:41:34

I could have written your post! Joining you in your resolution to put my phone down a bit more

Skibunny1980 Wed 07-Feb-18 16:45:44

www.the-pool.com/life/life-honestly/2018/5/Sali-Hughes-on-phone-addiction-and-mental-health

I found this useful.
I also downloaded ‘moment’ an app that tracks time spent on your mobile.
Frightening stuff once you see the numbers.

Deshasafraisy Wed 07-Feb-18 16:46:33

I have started putting my phone on airplane mode. Psychologically this helps me shut off from it for a while. When I go to bed, airplane mode. Watching tv, airplane mode, etc.

YerTiz Wed 07-Feb-18 16:52:13

It’s not all your fault OP, a lot of these apps are designed to be addictive:

www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/feb/05/tech-addiction-former-facebook-google-employees-campaign

www.theguardian.com/technology/2017/oct/05/smartphone-addiction-silicon-valley-dystopia

I’ve found podcasts really help! I put them on when I have boring jobs to do (sorting washing, tidying the kitchen) but they make it a pleasure. I look forward to that time now!

And I make a conscious effort to put my phone down to watch a programme with my kids/bake cakes/go on a walk/play for 20 min. The less you use it the easier it gets I think. I broke my phone a while ago and by the time it was fixed I was a lot better, but old habits creep back!

AnaViaSalamanca Wed 07-Feb-18 16:55:18

You are not alone. Most people are addicted to some degree and congrats to you for admitting it and starting to act, most don't. They get upset when it is brought up.

A good book to read - irresistible - the rise of addictive technology

Some other solutions:
1. Make your phone grayscale (black and white) - it seriously makes you want to look at your phone a lot less.
2. remove the offending apps altogether from your phone
3. switch off notifications except for calls
4. switch off data and wifi and use the phone as a phone.

Deshasafraisy Wed 07-Feb-18 16:58:19

How do you make your phone greyscale?

AnaViaSalamanca Wed 07-Feb-18 17:12:07

for iphone: setting->general->accesibility->display accomodation->color filters

options for android exists, but I don't know, you have to google it depending on the phone model

Doublevodka Wed 07-Feb-18 17:26:32

I know exactly what you mean OP. I deleted FB and Instagram a year ago and that has definitely been a good thing. I think I was generally much happier before 1997 ish when I didn't own a phone and none of my friends or family did. Maybe I've got my rose tinted glasses on but I'm sure life was a bit more interesting hearing people's news in person. I also think we made more of an effort to meet up. Now everything about everyone is there to see instantly.

FrogFairy Wed 07-Feb-18 17:43:57

Me too OP. I have wasted hours of my life mindlessly staring at the screen. Part of it is because I want to escape from my life by reading about other people.

It has become a real problem though, I have neglected my health and my home to the point I am falling to bits and living in a midden. I promise myself that tomorrow it will stop and I will get my act together but in reality the cycle continues. I have booked annual leave from work with good intentions and wasted the whole time (many, many times)

I am ashamed and I just can’t seem to change. I completely understand why kids get addicted to being online.

banannabreadforme Wed 07-Feb-18 20:09:00

I recently had a deleting session on my phone. I removed myself from all the silly groups I was a member of on FB. I deleted FB "friends" unless they were my actual friends. I get much fewer posts to read now so I have no need to go on as often.
I also removed lots of apps and games from my phone that were there for time wasting.
I have made the mums WhatsApp groups I'm a member of silent so I don't get a text every 5 mins.
I have downloaded the app "moment" which tells you how long you've been using your phone and how often. I have found this to be unhelpful as I keep checking it and feeling guilty if I've gone over the 2 hr limit. But others probably like it

PrivateParkin Wed 07-Feb-18 21:04:28

Skibunny that's a good article. Good on you for acknowledging this OP. I'm totally addicted/reliant on my phone. I hardly read any more. I have the feeling mentioned in the article where I can't concentrate properly and get easily distracted all the time. I also feel like life is passing me by. How much of this is linked to using a smart phone all the time - probably a lot! Argh! I need to cut down.

babybobobear Wed 07-Feb-18 22:37:31

I'm the same, wasted years of my life. Have downloaded moment and switched phone to greyscale to see if it helps

PickAChew Wed 07-Feb-18 22:42:48

Says the person who has come on t'internet to air their woes.

WorkingMumOnTheGo Sun 11-Feb-18 09:43:38

Hi everyone. Thank you all for your responses so far! It is good to see that I am not alone in this. I really, really hate what it has done to me. I have tried really hard this weekend but I have vowed to wake up early and get some coursework done before my uni lectures. I am still waiting for my phone to back up my photos and videos (got tons of them!) then I can reset my phone and possibly get a more basic one with less memory on it then I won't be able to install so many apps and get obsessed with using them x

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