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WIBU to reschedule this appointment?

(16 Posts)
WhenIsitOk Wed 07-Feb-18 09:23:40

I've posted about DD, whose 2.8 before. She has a number of conditions which require regular hospital appointments. She has at least 1 a week. In her life she's never missed a single appointment I've never postponed or rescheduled one.

DH and I have never had a date night out together since DD was born. We've both had 1 or 2 nights out each but not together as the other parent was always at home for DD.

In a few weeks a good friend of mine is performing at a bar in a city which is about 50 miles away from where we live. I am really excited for her, she's really good and this is her first time performing for such a big audience.

DH has suggested we book a hotel in the city, travel down and watch her perform then have a meal together and stay in the hotel. MIL is happy to babysit (she's actually excited about it, she's had full days with DD but never had her overnight before) and as the performance is on a Monday night she'll drop DD at Nursery on her way to work the next day.

DH and I started organising, DH asked for the Monday and Tuesday (he can work the Saturday and/or Sunday to make up the hours) off work and I asked for the Tuesday as AL. Then I got a letter this morning about DD having an appointment on the Tuesday.

It's quite an important appointment, as it's test results from some scans DD had done before Christmas. But the timing of the appointment means we wouldn't be back from the city in time to go.

We haven't booked anything for the performance yet but would it be selfish of me to this once prioritize myself and DH and have our night away. I nearly cried when I saw the letter.

I always prioritize DD, have never ever done anything like this before, and worried about moving the appointment, but at the same time I want to support my friend and have some time with my DH? My friend would completely understand we couldn't make it (she has 2 children of her own who will be with their dad that night) and wouldn't take it personally but like a selfish teenage I really want to go. I'd say we were away when rearranging the appointment. I wouldn't want it to be later in the day in case of delays getting back from the city on trains, so it would need to be at least the day after.

WIBU to reschedule the appointment? Or do I have to say "Sorry we can't make it" to my friend?

twotired Wed 07-Feb-18 09:28:44

Have you called to see if they have an appointment later in the day? Or one for the day after?

In the circumstances I would just try and find a more mutually convenient time for the appointment.

Hope the test results go well thanks

MsHomeSlice Wed 07-Feb-18 09:31:24

give them a call and see if there is any wiggle room..if it is that appointment or nothing for the next six months then you really can't miss it, but if you could make another withing a few weeks then i'd go for that.

laura65988 Wed 07-Feb-18 10:18:14

Phone them and reschedule if it was majorly important they will say it can't wait then go to appointment otherwise go and enjoy ureself xx

PattiStanger Wed 07-Feb-18 10:22:23

Ring and ask if you can change it.

You don't even know if there's an issue until you speak to the hospital

Bobbiepin Wed 07-Feb-18 10:34:44

I Don't think it's horribly selfish to want one night alone with your DH in nearly 3 years, especially with what's going on with DD. I think if you can reschedule the appointment and its not going to take months or dramatically affect DD's health you should definitely go.

Gazelda Wed 07-Feb-18 10:39:19

I think you should definitely give them a call to see if you can rearrange. If it's months until the next available appointment, then you'll probably decide to cancel your trip. But if it's only a few weeks, and doesn't impact DD's health or treatment, then i think it's totally reasonably to change the appointment.

altiara Wed 07-Feb-18 10:45:08

Call them and rearrange as you’re on holiday. That’s why they give you a phone number and say call them if you can’t make it!!!! wink It’s fine. And enjoy your mini holiday. flowers

onalongsabbatical Wed 07-Feb-18 10:45:53

Completely reasonable. It is allowed, you know. You sound like very dedicated parents, and you need a well-deserved night out.

MrsMozart Wed 07-Feb-18 10:48:13

If it's not going to make a difference in urgent treatment then rearrange it m'duck.

Those who do the caring do, sometimes, need to put themselves first.

I hope the results are good.

MrsDrSpencerReid Wed 07-Feb-18 10:48:53

I’m sure it will be fine to reschedule, I hope you get to enjoy your night out flowers

Flynnshine Wed 07-Feb-18 10:53:00

I would reschedule. Like you my daughter has lots of hospital appointments and on occasions they have actually clashed. If you call to reschedule you don't even have to give a reason. Just ask if there is another available appointment after that date. I doubt they will ask, if they do you can always say it clashes with another appointment which cannot be changed!

I hope you and your hubby have a wonderful night, I know all too well how important those times together are when you have such a hectic life. The scan results won't change if you wait another day or so and there are always people requiring urgent last minute appointments so you might even be helping someone else in the process xx

NotSoSprightly Wed 07-Feb-18 10:56:32

Your time away sounds lovely! Reschedule.

hollyberrytree Wed 07-Feb-18 11:15:34

Reschedule then do not think about it. You deserve a day off.

Hope you have a lovely time!

Sirzy Wed 07-Feb-18 11:20:49

See how soon you can rearrange for and then take it from there.

PourMeAGlassOfMilk Wed 07-Feb-18 11:25:11

I wouldn't beat yourself up about trying to rearrange one appointment when you have so many to get to. It's better that you ask the question as it may easily be rearranged for later on the same day or one day later that week. Hope you manage to rearrange and enjoy your night away.

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