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AIBU?

To be annoyed that baby change is always in disabled toilet?

101 replies

lizzlebizzle33 · 05/02/2018 02:02

Just that really, twice this week I have come out of a baby change (having had to deal with a full outfit change for 3mo old 🙈💩) to find a fed up looking person in a wheel chair has been waiting ages for the loo, or another mum in the same boat as me but having to wait there with a grumpy, stinky baby.

It makes me feel guilty and I always apologise but it's not my fault that's where they put the baby change and there is only one.

AIBU to think they could be a small room with one or two baby changes in? I wouldn't mind sharing.

Obviously not everywhere has the room to do this but the bigger places.

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EssentialHummus · 05/02/2018 02:13

I’ve even seen it done in a standard size cubicle, as a pull-down unit. That’s a good use of space, imo, even if the buggy needs to stay in the main bathroom area.

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Kpo58 · 05/02/2018 04:32

Unfortunately, if you have it elsewhere you still will get problems

  • in the ladies, then fathers cannot change nappies
  • separate room then there is usually nowhere for the parent to go to the loo or supervise slightly older children for the loo at the same time
  • in a normal cubicle then there is no space for the buggy (my purse did get stolen the only time I tried this) and there is nowhere safe to put a non walking very wriggly child when you tidy up


Annoyingly in all the shopping centres in my area, you need a radar key or you cannot access the baby changing facilities as they are all in the many disabled cubicles.
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Amanduh · 05/02/2018 05:09

Yanbu it’s ridiculous. My local
Waitrose, Morrisons and Sainsburys are great because they all have big changing rooms with toilets in too. And Westfield and the bigger shopping malls are quite good. But yes, I hate especially in restaurants/coffee shops where you take up the disabled toilet and someone in a wheelchair is waiting when you leave, happened yesterday in costa! I always feel bad but what can you do?!

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Pengggwn · 05/02/2018 06:37

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Sirzy · 05/02/2018 06:39

Of course the only one shouldn’t be in the disabled toilet. But sadly for most places disabled toilets are simply a tick box exercise rather than having any thought about the people who need to use them.

  • as for the excuses by kpo none of them are reasons to not have a space that is simply for disabled people. Tables can be put into male and female toilets, disabled toilets (contrary to popular belief) aren’t for everyone and anyone!
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AnguaResurgam · 05/02/2018 06:42

"AIBU to think they could be a small room with one or two baby changes in? I wouldn't mind sharing."

You'll need to suggest to the management which room they should be using.

Or that drop-downs are installed in both ladies and gents.

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hungryhenryshouldeatelsewhere · 05/02/2018 06:49

I used one at the weekend and someone had pissed all over the floor, meaning I had to try and navigate the really tiny space so that my feet, pram, or changing bag (no hooks to hang it up!) didn't get completely covered in piss. I have twins so my double buggy isn't exactly small. It was definitely a challenge.

I have a feeling the piss was left by a child (old enough to know better!) who used the cubicle shortly before me. I wish I could've found his parents Angry

Dedicated baby change rooms are much better but I understand why not all places can have them.

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thiskittenbarks · 05/02/2018 06:50

Ynbu. I feel like some disabled people must hate prams/pram pushers (but actually most people I speak to seem not to). You can't just not change a baby incase a disabled person needs the loo at the same time. And I haaaaate it when there is no loo in the baby changing room because it basically means Mum of baby can't go without some elaborate plan as to what to do with baby. Also a nightmare if you have a little one who needs a toilet and a baby too.
More big accessible loos everywhere!

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LostPlatypus · 05/02/2018 06:55

What about disabled parents who need to change their children? Or older children (and adults) who can only use a Changing Places facility because nowhere else is suitable?

All the points everyone has made so far about toilets being unsuitable when you have a buggy, or a pain because you don't want to make someone with a disability wait for the loo - I totally agree and I'm not trying to derail things. I'm just saying that there are other reasons why loos are unsuitable too.

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feral · 05/02/2018 07:08

All my local M&S have no loo in the baby change which is awful planning as mum or dad then can't pee t the same time.

This is why baby change in disabled loo is better as a parent however it's terrible planning!

We see so much about able bodied folk using disabled loos at the cost of persons who have the disability yet in this case there's no other choice as it's a 'shared space'.

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KayaG · 05/02/2018 07:12

Some small coffee hops only have one loo. It's an accessible one, to comply with the law but for everyone's use. I guess if the place is small there isn't that much "traffic".

I can understand why small places do this but the larger ones should allow more room.

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RingFence · 05/02/2018 07:25

I think they need to build more accessible toilets. Actually I think it's a good idea to have multipurpose accessible toilets, that fit wheelchairs AND buggies. I like to have space and privacy changing a baby. I don't want to leave the pram outside the cubicle- it makes sense to have it to hand so you don't have to unclip handbag, changing bag etc then squeeze into a tiny cubicle.

And I hate those changing tables next to the sink area- there's no dignity for a toddler being changed in full view, and nobody wants to see a dirty bottom being wiped. They are often right next to the handdriers, so baby panics every time the drier roars. And if you want to use the loo as well you either have to balance baby on your knee or strap them in the pram with the cubicle door ajar! Mums deserve some dignity too!

In our local shopping centre there's a line of accessible toilets, each containing a baby changing table and loo with drop-down rails. One contains 2 toilets side by side (presumably so mum and toddler can wee side by side?) And a changing places room though this needs a radar key.

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cdtaylornats · 05/02/2018 07:28

Space is cost, a seperate changing are is at the cost of one or two tables. If I said you can have a seperate area but at 5% of your income would you? Given that it would be for a limited user base how about a mother & baby surcharge of £1 until the child is 4?

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lizzlebizzle33 · 05/02/2018 07:31

I agree they space is an issue and a cost but if I had to pay £1 every time I wanted to change the baby I would be bankrupt 😂

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lizzlebizzle33 · 05/02/2018 07:35

@RingFence even though I find the issue annoying I do agree with all your points, I completely agree it would be a pain if there was no loo in the baby change, it's just a shame that disabled people have to share this space too but as its a large cubicle with a toilet anyway I guess it makes sense!

Maybe IABU?

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Pengggwn · 05/02/2018 07:35

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lizzlebizzle33 · 05/02/2018 07:37

@Pengggwn 😂

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zzzzz · 05/02/2018 07:39

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stoneagefertilitydoll · 05/02/2018 07:40

Given that it would be for a limited user base how about a mother & baby surcharge of £1 until the child is 4?

How about mothers and babies boycott shops that don't have decent facilities and see if they make up more or less than 5% of the income?

Isn't the stat that mothers in a family control the majority of the daily purchasing budget?

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Pengggwn · 05/02/2018 07:46

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wysteriafloribunba · 05/02/2018 07:46

Cost and space constraints. I dont think sharing is so terrible. There is a blank cheque mentality about a lot of things. Businesses do their best with the resources they have.

I agree that where a large business with deep pockets is designing a new store they should make every effort to provide the best possible solution.

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BikeRunSki · 05/02/2018 07:47

John Lewis, Mothercare and Moto sevice stations used to (we have had nappies for 4 yrs now) have “parent rooms”. They had changing tables, a toilet , often a child size toilet too. The JL one also had a separate area of nursing chairs and bottle warmers.

I shopped at JL a lot when. I had babies!

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lizzlebizzle33 · 05/02/2018 07:47

@zzzzz learn to change my baby faster? I think I do s pretty good job and when the poo is up the back of their neck because they didn't poo for 3 days then decided to let it all go while your out fm doing your shopping, it can take a while!!

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Eltonjohnssyrup · 05/02/2018 07:48

If you put them in the ladies or gents about 75% of the time people with twins won't be able to get in there because they are inaccessible to tandem or double buggies. Often the case with separate changing rooms too.

If you're getting bad leaks that often you might want to review which brand of nappy you are using.

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lizzlebizzle33 · 05/02/2018 07:49

@BikeRunSki that sounds like heaven!

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