DD has my surname although I did offer to double barrel with her dads when she was born. At the time he said he wasn’t bothered, had no real attachment to his surname (it’s his dad’s who he doesn’t see) and was happy for her to have mine.
Before we separated it had started to bother him and we’d talked about if we married he’d change his name to mine and dd’s. Now we’ve split he’s been asking if I’ll change her surname and double barrel it to include his. I did say I’d consider it and he keeps asking, but I don’t want to.
I’m not a fan of double barrelled names and I like how her name sounds, as it is.
Plus a few weeks ago he was moving country, now he’s not! Then he was moving city, now he’s not! I do think that’s probably all to mess with me and not that he’ll actually leave her, but it doesn’t help his case.
He asked again tonight and I really want to tell him I’m not changing it and that’s that. But I feel a bit guilty and don’t know if I’m being completely unreasonable. I’d be upset not to have the same name as her, but then I wouldn’t have agreed to that in the first place.
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AIBU?
AIBU to not change dd’s surname?
95 replies
Emboo19 · 01/02/2018 22:08
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