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AIBU to consider asking guests to bring a bottle to our wedding?

(183 Posts)
NaiceBiscuits Sat 20-Jan-18 08:33:31

We're on a budget. We have lots of friends and family and want to invite as many as we can (around 100 including children). We've found a community hall for the reception and we're thinking of doing things like this:

- Later afternoon informal wedding
- Wedding cake and mulled cider reception for all comers (may be up to 150) while family photos are taken
- Buffet reception (invited guests)for a couple of hours including party games

Aiming for an earlyish finish

we're also saying that we don't want gifts (but offering a charity for donations if people really want to give something)

Our friends have differing tastes in drinks. Some don't drink, some like wine, some gin, some beer. I'm not sure how much we'd need of each (and I don't drink wine myself). Would we BU to put 'bring a bottle' on the invites? blush

EllaHen Sat 20-Jan-18 08:35:11

I would be happy to bring a bottle.

BattleCuntGalactica Sat 20-Jan-18 08:36:06

Totally reasonable request.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Sat 20-Jan-18 08:36:42

I think it would be ok but I’d skip the charity donations. You also need to make it clear that it’s for them to drink - so it needs to be chilled if necessary.

Perhaps say you’re providing soft drinks and people are welcome to bring alcoholic drinks if they prefer. Can you provide ice/buckets/glasses? Supermarkets will often hire them out.

Discusting Sat 20-Jan-18 08:36:59

I would much prefer a wedding where I could bring a bottle than a ridiculousness my overpriced bar!

ThroughThickAndThin01 Sat 20-Jan-18 08:37:14

I'd be happy with that.

Runningissimple Sat 20-Jan-18 08:37:49

I've been to weddings where you bring a bottle or there's a bar where you pay for your drinks. They were lovely and I didn't mind at all.

catkind Sat 20-Jan-18 08:38:26

We went to a wedding which was no gifts, bring a bottle and a dish. It was great fun, and the catering was epic. Go for it.

Alternatively you could have limited options (beer, fizz, soft drinks) and assume people will manage to select something they can tolerate. Or say that's what you are doing and bring a bottle if you want to drink anything else.

TheVanguardSix Sat 20-Jan-18 08:38:48

I wouldn't do BYOB.
I'd offer squash (for the kids), coke and sprite, and I'd get some cases of red, white, and perhaps prosecco. And just have jugs of water that guests can help themselves to. You don't have to offer a full bar. Keep it simple.

Nyancat Sat 20-Jan-18 08:39:10

I would be delighted to be invited to a byo wedding, mostly because I get charged about £10 for a single gin and tonic when I'm out and the idea of bringing my own would be great!

Your wedding sounds wonderful, hope you have an amazing day!

RandomMess Sat 20-Jan-18 08:39:14

I would ask that in lieu of gifts bring a bottle (of something you'd like to drink) and a desert.

Seriously some of the best weddings I have been to are bring and share. I'd be a bit worried about the party games personally...

x2boys Sat 20-Jan-18 08:39:34

I would be happy with that is significantly cheaper than a bar .

acornsandnuts Sat 20-Jan-18 08:39:34

Sounds lovely. I’d have no issues at all.

OuchBollocks Sat 20-Jan-18 08:40:35

I would love a BYOB wedding. 2 bottles of prosecco are £14 in the co-op at the minute, you can spend that on 2 small glasses in some pricey venues.

KalaLaka Sat 20-Jan-18 08:42:30

I think it's fine! I wouldn't do charity donations; people may wish to buy you gifts. Don't feel bad about accepting them!

ShastaTrinity Sat 20-Jan-18 08:44:05

Totally different than charging your guests for their drinks, it's perfectly fine.

You have a casual weddings where everybody brings a dish (someone needed to coordinate the food), it's also lovely. A casual friendly wedding can be lovely, what isn't is a wedding trying to be posh and trying to get your guests to pay for it.

officerjudyhopps Sat 20-Jan-18 08:44:06

Your wedding sounds lovely. I would love a BYOB invitation - you can bring something you know you’ll want to drink and only pay supermarket rather than cash bar prices! smile

jellyandsoup Sat 20-Jan-18 08:44:36

I would love that! Could you provide some big buckets with ice to keep stuff cool? I think inwould try to provide soft drinks too but up to you obviously. Good luck, sounds great, love more low key weddings x

gunsandbanjos Sat 20-Jan-18 08:45:17

i Think it’s fine.

OliviaBenson Sat 20-Jan-18 08:46:16

I'd love this. It will probably save guests money - cheaper than them buying overpriced drinks at a bar. Win win!

PrincessoftheSea Sat 20-Jan-18 08:47:14

I would love it and think it very sensible. I hate very expensive weddings with lots of silly faff.

LoniceraJaponica Sat 20-Jan-18 08:51:17

Great idea. OH is a eine enthusiast and it would mean we could drink some really decent wine at an affordable price.

Don't forget to provide some glasses. And ice buckets filled with ice are a good idea.

LoniceraJaponica Sat 20-Jan-18 08:51:34


NaiceBiscuits Sat 20-Jan-18 08:52:45

Good idea about providing soft drinks and ice buckets. Yes, we can do that smile

NaiceBiscuits Sat 20-Jan-18 08:55:07

The people we're inviting should be ok with the party games and it fits with who we are (geeky). All will be opt in, not forced!

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