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To think this is a bit of an over-reaction on DH's part?

(125 Posts)
MiniMummy576 Tue 16-Jan-18 16:38:50

I posted an AIBU a while ago about wanting DH to take notice of the chores that need doing around the house. Following the advice I put together a weekly schedule and put it on the fridge (I got the template from Mydarlaclementine.com and found it really useful to set out everything that needs doing on a weekly and monthly basis and split it over the week!!) with asterisks next to anything that DH can pitch in with.
One of the daily tasks is to spray the bathroom surfaces with the daily cleaner after the shower's been used (one of the ones that doesn't need to be wiped off). I asked DH to remember to do this as he has a shower every morning. He's been a bit sporadic with remembering, but this morning after coming out of the bathroom I heard him rush back in and start spritzing.
The only 'problem' was that the old bottle of spray had run out, so I'd bought a new one and reused the bottle to mix up a Zoflora spray, but hadn't had time to write on the bottle what it was or get the new one out of the cupboard.
DH made a point of proudly mentioning to me that he'd remembered to spritz the shower and I thanked him, but pointed out that I'd now switched the bottle, so he needed to use the different brand from now on.
He then threw up his hands and said 'Oh FFS that's the last time that I'm bothering to do it then'
I said there was no need to get annoyed, he'd just have to look out for a different bottle.
Then he said 'Well you should have told me before I wasted my time spraying the shower. I suppose you want me to respray it'
I told him no, the shower spray can't be sprayed over the top of another cleaner, but that the stuff in the bottle is disinfectant, so it didn't matter for today.
'FFS, you can do it yourself from now on then' he said.
I pointed out it wasn't a problem, he hadn't done anything wrong and all I was saying was that he needs to look out for the new bottle but he wasn't having any of it.

Is it just me or was this a (completely baffling) over-reaction from DH over such a little thing???

bemusedSpectator Tue 16-Jan-18 16:41:02

I assume he's frustrated with his job list.

Does he sign when he's completed a task or do you check his work and sign on his behalf?

BreakfastAtSquiffanys Tue 16-Jan-18 16:41:41

I'd be irritated if you filled the bottle I'd been using all week with something else

JeansAndANiceTop Tue 16-Jan-18 16:42:28

Cleaning your bathroom seems overly complicated.

Whatshallidonowpeople Tue 16-Jan-18 16:42:47

Why don't you just leave the bottle in the shower?

Bookishh Tue 16-Jan-18 16:43:17

I kinda agree with him

DriggleDraggle Tue 16-Jan-18 16:43:58

it is pretty pathetic that an adult needs a spreadsheet on what to clean.

you put asterix on anything he can pitch in with and thank him for his help ?
its no wonder he feels like he is doing you a favour and acts like a sulky teen.

who the hell advised you to treat him like a clueless toddler?

an adult is equally rrsponsible for cleaning the house they live in and should be ashamed and embarrassed to need to be walked through it.

PinkHeart5914 Tue 16-Jan-18 16:45:07

Does he have a sticker chart for after you’ve checked his work?

A weekly schedule on the fridge? What fresh hell is this

You switched what was in the bottle, didn’t bother labelling to say it was diffrent and then oh you can’t use that as I changed whats in the bottle, I’d be a bit hmm too tbh and I’d be telling you to do it yourself too

ClaryFray Tue 16-Jan-18 16:45:31

It seems rather a lot of work when sprays a spray. I'd have just been thankful he did it, and used the "proper" hmm spray when you next clean the bathroom.

DonnyAndVladSittingInATree Tue 16-Jan-18 16:45:50

Oh wow! So much wrong I dont know where to start.

BurningStar Tue 16-Jan-18 16:46:07

You sound WAY over the top. No wonder your DH has had enough!

Goldfishshoals Tue 16-Jan-18 16:46:47

I think he's grumpy at having to do some cleaning so long for any excuse to kick back.

battenbergbutterfly Tue 16-Jan-18 16:47:52

I hope he gets a sticker when he's done it correctly

CotswoldStrife Tue 16-Jan-18 16:50:10

So your DH remembered to do it, but you told him he'd done it wrong anyway through no fault of his own? I can see why he was annoyed tbh, because he probably felt like he'd put the effort in but can't get anything right! It would have been more productive IMO not to tell him you'd switched the contents of the bottles!

Booboobooboo84 Tue 16-Jan-18 16:51:02

On a safety note you should never mix chemicals in a bottle previously used for something else. Ever. You don’t know how things will react to each other.

As for your dh I think he’s overreacting to an unreasonable cleaning schedule. Why can’t you just split the work. So he always cleans the shower and it’s up to him to make sure he has the stuff to do it

Bluelady Tue 16-Jan-18 16:51:04

What does he have to do to get a gold star? Ridiculous. Get a grip.

Julie8008 Tue 16-Jan-18 16:51:15

You cover you shower in chemicals every day. Crikey you really must do jobs that involve a lot of dirt. I clean the shower once a week and it always looks pretty clean to me, wouldn't feel happy using so many chemicals on a daily basis. Poor husband.

MrsNacho Tue 16-Jan-18 16:51:53

Erm.... I probably would have had a strop too, can't do right for doing wrong.

Scottishlassie81 Tue 16-Jan-18 16:52:01

I feel your frustration OP. I have a DH who is the same. He doesn't pitch in enough (at all) and we both work full time so I feel like I have to give him a list like a child. It's just a verbal list at the moment but it just turns me in to a nag and it's not fair as I don't see why I have to do all the housework. We have dogs as well so we really need to keep on top of the cleaning or it becomes a huge task and I don't want to spend my weekends cleaning!

I am swaying between having another rant and afterwards things get better for a week or just rounding up his shit and putting in all in a box for him to deal with. I've already chucked out some joggers after finding them on the floor for the 10th time. I was feeling particularly evil that day. Thing is, he hasn't noticed they are gone.

I'm going to start having to hide the playstation remotes or changing the wifi password like you do for a child.

thedancingbear Tue 16-Jan-18 16:52:24

Fuck that. He should've realised that it was a different chemical in the bottle and used his initiative. Was it a different colour? Did it have a different smell? He should be noticing these things.

LyraPotter Tue 16-Jan-18 16:52:28

He's definitely overreacting! Maybe he feels like it's 'yet another thing' on top of his job list but given that all your asking is for him to pull his weight there is no need for him to behave like such a brat.

I8toys Tue 16-Jan-18 16:52:39

You would annoy me too!

NeedsAsockamnesty Tue 16-Jan-18 16:53:52

One do not decant cleaning products into containers that have contained other cleaning products.

Two don’t give people grief if they have followed your instructions because you fucked up

Three remember he’s the type of bloke who needs a list so he’s going to be the type to get silly over stuff

letsdolunch321 Tue 16-Jan-18 16:54:06

Your dh sounds as bad as mine telling me “he knows how to clean the bathroom”...... Well matey why don’t you do it more often then.

MEN !!!!

PippiLongstromp Tue 16-Jan-18 16:54:41

I can't get over the fact you bleach your shower every day! Totally unnecessary and bad for the environment. If you want to excessively clean the house fine, but I don't think you can demand that of others, ie your DH.

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