Hello everyone I'm new here today and came across this site while searching for some help for my mum.
The research I've done shows the same things as her solicitor says so I wanted to run it by you all for some insight and any additional help if you have experience.
My dad left her 2.5 years ago. He is someone who is paranoid about government, courts, judges, police etc and so although he threatened her with divorce / WANTED a divorce from her, he never actually went through with it and went off with another lady and is living with her and her kids but we don't know exactly where. We've seen him about 3x in all these years, all 3x with the lady and her kids but we dont know where they live etc, we don't know his current contact number, place of work or address. He does not have any close family or freinds in UK. (long story short: he is abusive and controlling and although he has some step family in UK, no one has been in contact with each other for over 20 years through his own doing, we were very much loners all our life).
When he left he signed a council form handing over full tenancy to my mum and wrote a letter to confirm this which he signed too. Council had said this is all well and legit but they will also need an official document proving divorce before they put the tenancy in my mum's name to prove they are no longer together.
Before this, in the 25 or so years they've been living together he has never, ever put her as a joint tenancy, also for control reasons.
When he left he had also left us in several thousands of pounds debt in rent and council taxes which we had to pay off as soon as we told council he had left or they threatened to evict us too. So we cleared the rent and council tax debt which put credit to his name and we are still paying rent and council tax, always up to date etc but it is in my dad's name so its doing him good instead of my mum as my mum has no place on the council register / not known to them because of my dad.
We had gone to a solicitor back then so she could divorce him but they said without his address to hand him a divorce notice in person or a family/friends address who could hand him the divorce notice for us there is no way to proceed with a divorce unless she waited 2 years or more, after which she can do a missing spouse divorce.
Does anyone have any advice and tips on this? Does anyone know how this works and what has to be done? We cannot do it ourselves online as we don't know his address etc so that's why we are trying to do it through a solicitor who has also said without an address to send the papers or to hand it to him in person, it would be near enough impossible. Is there any other way?
He does sometimes pay child maintenance for my younger sibling's (14 & 17) but will the cms reveal his address to us if we explained it's for divorce purposes?
Also, aibu to think this is illegal?
In the 2.5 years he has left he has been using our address for various things which I think are fraud activities:
-he has gone to France and used our address to loan a car and the outstanding bill + fine for speeding ticket came to us!
-he has taken out several loan's from banks, loan websites and other companies while using our address when he doesn't even live here anymore.
-he has falsely used mine and my siblings names for loans and other things!
What can we do about this?
Any help would be appreciated. Thank you.
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To want divorce from missing spouse
26 replies
msserene · 12/01/2018 20:22
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