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AIBU?

Refusing to take in neighbours parcels

58 replies

Enwi · 21/12/2017 13:26

Hi everyone,
I feel like a real grinch now but I’m just so, so tired of this happening and I’d really like some opinions from someone slightly less sleep deprived and emotional than me right now.
I’m a childminder and almost every day I am at home between 12-2pm as it’s nap time for my mindees. The post almost always comes about 1pm, which is fine. Every single day, the post man knocks on my door and asks me to take in a parcel for a next door neighbour (almost always the same neighbour, but we’ve had a parcel for most houses on the street at some point!). My usual postman is pretty good and knows I have babies sleeping, but still as the nursery is directly above the front door babies get woken. We also have loads of other delivery drivers from DPD/Hermes etc who aren’t as considerate, and knock so ridiculously hard on the door it frightens the life out of me. The parcels from one particular neighbour range in size, but sometimes take up my entire hallway which is already tight with children’s bags, coats, car seats etc. Neighbour then comes to collect the parcel at 5pm, which is the same time most of my mindees are being collected so said hallway then has parents, mindees, bags, coats, car seats, neighbour’s parcels and neighbour who is trying to make conversation and never seems to see that she is in the way.
Today a post lady has knocked on the door. I was on the toilet so didn’t come immediately, so she hammered much harder and woke the baby up who 1) isn’t feeling well at the moment and 2) fell asleep 10 minutes ago. I went downstairs and she said that she had a parcel for a neighbour and could I sign for it. I said ‘I’m sorry I won’t. I take one in every day and my baby has just been woken up. Sorry’. The lady said ‘what?’ And I repeated myself. She then rolled her eyes, said ‘right fine’ and huffily walked back to her car.
I know the neighbourly thing to do is just to take the parcel, and I’m now worried that this could have been a present for someone that they wanted to arrive before Christmas, but I’m really annoyed that said neighbour just assumes I’m fine with receiving her deliveries every single day. DP told me to put up a sign saying ‘no deliveries please’ or something to that effect, but I don’t want to not be able to receive my own parcels if a friend was to deliver something to me/ my family overseas sent presents etc.
Am I a total grinch? Do I need to go and speak to the neighbour and clarify that I won’t be receiving parcels anymore? How do I do that without sounding like an unreasonable cow?

OP posts:
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WoodenRainbow · 21/12/2017 13:30

Put a sign up saying you won’t take parcels between certain hours? Or put it up when the baby naps? They will just ask another neighbour.

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user1471451564 · 21/12/2017 13:31

I would just put the sign up as suggested. No one minds taking parcels in for neighbours on the odd occasions but sounds to me that you have become the automatic go to one stop. No likes being taken advantage of and this reads to me of exactly that. (Plus i have a baby and postmen/delivery drivers hammering on the door and waking them when i have just settled down to an hours peace makes me somewhat ragey).

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CheekyFuckersAreEntertaining · 21/12/2017 13:32

Put up a sign stating "Only parcels for this address" and think nothing more of it. If people don't provide a safe place for parcels to be left (you can buy courier lockable boxes) or will not be in for parcel deliveries then they need to not order online or have them delivered to their workplace.

I personally don't mind taking in parcels but if it was too often then no way would I carry on.

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Chocolate254 · 21/12/2017 13:32

Firstly I would put a large sign up on my door saying knock quietly as babies may be sleeping! I know some delivery drivers can be a nightmare, We had one last week hammering on our window when we didnt answer the door quick enough, Totally rude.

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sheepskinrug · 21/12/2017 13:32

I agree with putting a sign up. YANBU.

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Greenshoots1 · 21/12/2017 13:34

why don't you have a sign up? and a muffler on the knocker at that time?

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x2boys · 21/12/2017 13:35

That does sound ridiculous I don't mind taking in my neighbours parcels but I have only taken in 4 or 5 in the three years we have been here .

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Josieannathe2nd · 21/12/2017 13:36

Definitely put up a sign saying no deliveries for other houses. If you were my childminder I’d be concerned my children were getting disturbed and consider an alternative provider if they weren’t getting a proper nap because you couldn’t stop deliveries from other people.

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letsdolunch321 · 21/12/2017 13:37

Yes the idea of a sign stating deliveries only for this address is what I would do.

I tell delivery people that I don’t talk to my neighbours. My dp days I am mean, he is too nice to say no.

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PilarTernera · 21/12/2017 13:40

YANBU

The postie was getting huffy because it's extra work for her if she can't leave it with someone. That's not your problem.

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Idreamofalandrover · 21/12/2017 13:41

I never take in neighbours parcels, I get anxious about getting it to them as soon as possible. I just say I can't

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Cheby · 21/12/2017 13:41

I bluetac a sign to the door while my baby naps saying no knocking. I take it down when she’s up again. If I’m edpecting a delivery I have a different one that asks they knock gently, and then I hover near the front door for the duration.

Didn’t need to do this with my eldest, who barely slept but when she did was out for the count. Youngest needs a lot more sleep, and wakes at the tiniest noises and then is grumpy for the rest of the day.

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RestingGrinchFace · 21/12/2017 13:44

Put up a sign that you won't take parcels not addressed to you. Or maybe a sign to knock quietly.

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RandomMess · 21/12/2017 13:51

Absolutely put a sign up "Babies sleeping, do not disturb, post for this address only"

We happily take in parcels but it doesn't inconvenience us. Somehow the huge cat & dog food always seems to arrive when DH is out (he works from home) and my poor neighbours end up with a 20kg parcel in their house Blush

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ineedwine99 · 21/12/2017 13:52

I agree with put a sign up, just because your in doesn't mean your a parcel holding service!
Hope the baby got back to sleep

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LesDennishair · 21/12/2017 13:55

Just from the title I was prepared to say you were being unreasonable. However, having read your posts, every day is too much, far too much. I agree with a sign/note on the door,

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froshiechipandbrickie · 21/12/2017 14:04

I agree, put a note on the door.

‘Sleeping children between 12-2, only disturb if post is for this adress’?

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Blackdogsrock · 21/12/2017 14:10

You are not being unreasonable. I too am sick of taking in everyone else S parcels. I don’t have small children but It am sick of it particularly as one neighbour who orbs all days orders everything on line which then end up in my hall and she can’t even be assed to come and collect them, I have a pa cel for her that has been her 3 days and whilst it is taking up space on principle I am not going to deliver it.

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DoItAgainBob · 21/12/2017 14:11

Agree but a sign up but also putter g blue tack on the door knocker works a treat and muffles the sound.

I only take parcels for certain neighbours these days as I had issues with some people in house shares knocking at 10pm at night to collect and waking the DC's up. No way would I take a large package either. The hallway is just not big enough.

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Blackdogsrock · 21/12/2017 14:11

Works , she may well be orhbing though!

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Starlight2345 · 21/12/2017 14:12

i am a childminder and my babies are currently sleeping.. sign is on my door. No deliveries except for my address and knock quietly babies sleeping.

As my DC pointed out why is it we take parcels in for others but we have to collect ours from the post office..It is because most people on our street are at work, however I am working looking after the children and don't have time to open the door numerous times a day for other people.

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DrinkFeckArseGirls · 21/12/2017 14:13

You can get most parcels delivered to a locker or a local post office - mainly Amazon but also Parcelforce and dpd. eBay deliver to Argos.

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NovemberWitch · 21/12/2017 14:14

Large parcels in your hall compromise your fire safety rules, and if I were a client, I wouldn’t be happy. Not grinch at all. :)

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Increasinglymiddleaged · 21/12/2017 14:17

If it's an issue for you then stop taking them in, simples. There is no god given right for parcels to be taken in for neighbours. We have one neighbour who must refuse because she is in a lot and has never, ever taken one for us. That's fine and their perogative. I tend to take them in (I wfh quite a bit) because then I feel less bad when people take them in for us. But, you are meant to be looking after little children not running a parcel depot. I'd have thought that potentially blocking your entrance with parcels is a health and safety risk anyway.

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Viviennemary · 21/12/2017 14:23

I do think you are being a bit precious. But you've decided no parcels so put up a notice by your front door. And you can't expect people to take in parcels for you.

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