People have different parenting styles. I completely get that. However, there is "letting kids make their own mistakes" and there is being irreponsible and ruining other people's stuff.
Some months back I offered a friend fruit from our garden. She enthusiastically said yes. We were away when it was ripe, so I explained carefully which trees it was (she wouldn't necessarily have found them easily otherwise) and that other plants in the same area were delicate/ needed not to be trampled/ had poisonous fruit and leaves. She said "oh I'll send the kids in then". I referred her back to what I had said about delicate/poisonous plants, and said it would be better if she could pick the fruit herself, as I was not comfortable with unsupervised 8 & 10 year olds potentially picking the wrong things.
Got home to find delicate plants trashed, branches ripped off, fruits picked unripe & thrown on the ground, saplings pulled out of the ground. Fruit trees with ripe fruit were also pretty trashed, all the fruit taken and branches ripped off and thrown on the ground.
Saw friend, mentioned the garden was in need of a bit of TLC. She said "yeah the kids had a great time" and had apparently sent them in to play by themselves on several days. Apparently it takes a village to raise a child (she loves this phrase) so sending her kids to play in our garden when we are away is appropriate...
Since then she has been making digs repeatedly about me being a helicopter parent and how her kids are independent learners, fearless, brave, inquisitive, etc while my DS is scared of other people, can't walk or talk yet because I mollycoddle him.
FFS. DS is normal, he's 1. Her kids are indeed fearless, but inappropriately so in the context of trashing our garden with zero supervision. GRRR.
Or am I uptight and denying her children their right to a childhood?
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AIBU?
to suggest friend supervises her own kids?
94 replies
Taubenpost · 18/12/2017 00:19
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FrancisCrawford ·
18/12/2017 05:29
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Pengggwn ·
18/12/2017 06:06
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