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Sexual Assault **May be triggering**

(162 Posts)
ItsFindersKeepers Sun 17-Dec-17 21:15:47

NC for this but regular poster...

I may be flamed for saying this but AIBU to think that the term 'sexual assult' is a broad spectrum and that there's a HUGE difference between someone squeezing someone's bum and being penetrated by something other than a penis (as that would be rape)?

I'm not saying that someone squeezing a bum is okay in the slightest but I wouldn't want someone going to prison or convicted over it. Or do you believe their all as bad as each other and need locking up?

I was reading about the Todd from Corrie case and wondering what it was that he actually did. I personally don't think he deserves the sack for a drunken ass squeeze but anything more then yes.

I don't know, maybe it's my attitude that's what's wrong here. My arse was frequently squeezed on a night out and whilst I didn't like it and told them to fuck off, I wouldn't want them thrown in prison either.

HoneyIshrunkthebiscuit Sun 17-Dec-17 21:17:19

yabu. Yes they don't hold the same weight, but sexual assualt (even a bum squeeze) is a crime and they should be punished. We have normalised behaviour like this and its time we reversed that.

LeCroissant Sun 17-Dec-17 21:21:16

So in your opinion, how much assault should women have to put up with?

Tinselistacky Sun 17-Dec-17 21:22:53

I agree op, I wouldn't want to label someone a pervert because they couldn't resist a squeeze of my bum tbh.

Catsize Sun 17-Dec-17 21:23:25

This is why we have different sentences - to differentiate and acknowledge the seriousness of the particular offence.

As someone who felt she just had to put up with being groped at school/on a night out etc, I am glad that times are changing with more enlightened attitudes about this kind of thing.

Rest assured OP, it is highly unlikely someone would be thrown into prison for squeezing someone’s behind in a nightclub.

AfunaMbatata Sun 17-Dec-17 21:24:55

So men should be allowed to grope women as long as it’s not “too bad” according to you?

LeCroissant Sun 17-Dec-17 21:24:59

If I can't resist stealing some milk is that also ok Tinsel?

PurpleDaisies Sun 17-Dec-17 21:27:03

My arse was frequently squeezed on a night out and whilst I didn't like it and told them to fuck off, I wouldn't want them thrown in prison either.

He hasn’t been thrown in prison. I agree with the decision to sack him from his job. Touching women without their consent is totally out of order.

Tinselistacky Sun 17-Dec-17 21:27:20

Ime when people have had trauma in their lives they are entitled to label things trivial as they say we fit.
Unfortunately bad bad times for me would consider a squeezed bum too minor to raise an eyebrow.
Each to their own boundaries though.

HoneyIshrunkthebiscuit Sun 17-Dec-17 21:28:03

also he groped four women in one evening, only two of them have pressed charges but its more than a 'cheeky squeeze'

SmileEachDay Sun 17-Dec-17 21:29:23

I agree op, I wouldn't want to label someone a pervert because they couldn't resist a squeeze of my bum tbh

Really?

Can’t resist.

Poor men. Not in control of their urges.

WickedLazy Sun 17-Dec-17 21:30:49

"We have normalised behaviour like this and its time we reversed that"

^This.

laudanum Sun 17-Dec-17 21:32:51

Who the fuck let Matt Damon in?

HoneyIshrunkthebiscuit Sun 17-Dec-17 21:34:23

laudanum fgrin

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross Sun 17-Dec-17 21:37:58

“Couldn’t resist?” What a load of bollocks. It’s nothing to do with finding you irresistible (sorry to burst your bubble), it’s all to do with not regarding you as worthy of treating with any kind of respect or dignity. I bet men with a female boss are suddenly and bizarrely capable of resisting the temptation to squeeze her bum.

Why is it so hard to understand that it’s precisely because the more minor assaults have been shrugged off for so long that the climate of all types of sexual harrassment is so pervasive now?

PurpleMinionMummy Sun 17-Dec-17 21:38:16

It is a large spectrum. Does sentencing/punishment fit in suitably with where an act lies on that spectrum? I think that's the most important thing.

I can't feel sorry for someone who got the sack for squeezing someone's arse whatever though. Although I believe he was inappropriate with more than one woman that evening.

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross Sun 17-Dec-17 21:42:28

laudanum - love it. Exactly what I was thinking when I typed my much more long winded post - you said it much better grin

AnUnhappyStudent Sun 17-Dec-17 21:46:11

One of the victims is a friend of a friend. She was inside the club waiting for her husband. He walked up to her cupped her vulva with his hand and squeezed. Hard. I think he deserved a lot more than merely sacking for displaying such contempt for wome
Scum.

laudanum Sun 17-Dec-17 21:50:01

Whenever he Matt Damon opens his rotting pie hole, all i can ever think off is Team America where he says his name in a really disparaging manner. Team America is AWFUL, but they got that bit right.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QApeYpw7KQQ

Stop. Minimising. Sexual. Assault. Full. STOP.

ItsFindersKeepers Sun 17-Dec-17 21:55:19

Hmmm just me then. I wonder why I think differently? I just wouldn't say if a man had squeezed my arse that I had been sexually assaulted.

LeCroissant Sun 17-Dec-17 21:57:07

So a man can just touch your body whenever he wants?

PurpleDaisies Sun 17-Dec-17 21:58:00

i just wouldn't say if a man had squeezed my arse that I had been sexually assaulted.

Why do you think other people have the right to do that? What if it happened to your child?

ItsFindersKeepers Sun 17-Dec-17 21:59:29

No I don't believe they can but then again I'll tell them that and won't tolerate it. If they continue, that's a different matter. But I wouldn't find it necessary to involve the police.

LeCroissant Sun 17-Dec-17 22:00:21

So they can go ahead and touch you and you'll tell them to stop? That's the solution?

PurpleDaisies Sun 17-Dec-17 22:01:01

But I wouldn't find it necessary to involve the police.

And if someone squeezed your child’s bottom?

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