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To have tried to help a homeless man?

(182 Posts)
darkcandlelight Sun 17-Dec-17 16:34:02

Went to Manchester for the Christmas markets and we stayed over last night. There was a homeless man sleeping by our hotel and I was really concerned about him. This morning my 11 yo was worried he wasn't moving so we went to get dh up to ask him (he has a medical background) and took him a cup of tea. Dh is really annoyed with me, he says it was irresponsible.

So was I being unreasonable? I really thought the man had died at one point.

Koala2018 Sun 17-Dec-17 16:35:31

What did he think was irresponsible? Checking to see if a homeless person is ok?

What you did sounds very kind and reasonable, don't listen to him.

Eltonjohnssyrup Sun 17-Dec-17 16:36:38

No, you did a really nice thing. How was he?

Eltonjohnssyrup Sun 17-Dec-17 16:37:43

Did you take the 11yo with you? That's the only thing he could reasonably have had issue with.

darkcandlelight Sun 17-Dec-17 16:38:25

He did wake up but had gone back to sleep by the time I came back with the tea. I was just thinking, so many people could have walked past and he'd have died and they wouldn't know.

MrsTerryPratchett Sun 17-Dec-17 16:38:29

Homeless people aren't any more dangerous than any other random stranger. So I wouldn't have sent the 11yo alone, but if you were with her, can't see the harm.

Treating everyone like they are human beings is the first step to being a human being yourself.

darkcandlelight Sun 17-Dec-17 16:39:05

My 11 yo was with me but never unsupervised but that was what he was annoyed about.

Greenshoots1 Sun 17-Dec-17 16:40:07

contact street link

A cup of tea is neither here nor there. A total non issue

I expect you DHs problem was that you were taking your child up close to a potential corpse, with no knowing how or why he had died, so yes, that was irresponsible. Very.

PinkHeart5914 Sun 17-Dec-17 16:40:33

I don’t see what you did wrong tbh, I’d say you just behaved in a human way and did a nice thing

Even with the 11 year old I still don’t see why anyone would take issue, I mean god fordib if a child with its parent should check someone in the freezing fucking cold is ok

MrsTerryPratchett Sun 17-Dec-17 16:40:50

Even if the poor bloke had wanted to attack you, I doubt he'd be capable after a night out in the cold. Poor bugger.

Bubblebubblepop Sun 17-Dec-17 16:41:16

This makes me really sad- like it's ok for a homeless person to be dead

Greenshoots1 Sun 17-Dec-17 16:41:32

Homeless people aren't any more dangerous than any other random stranger.

but far more likely to be dead

MrsTerryPratchett Sun 17-Dec-17 16:42:10

If that was the DH's problem, fair enough. I doubt it though.

IamtheDevilsAvocado Sun 17-Dec-17 16:42:26

Also you are teaching your child social responsibility... This is a good trait...

pisacake Sun 17-Dec-17 16:43:00

"Homeless people aren't any more dangerous than any other random stranger. "

More likely to have mental illness, be on drugs, etc.

darkcandlelight Sun 17-Dec-17 16:45:07

Don't get me wrong, I would never put DCS in danger.

Homeless man was in a doorway and so I saw he was unconscious and tried to wake hime (didn't touch him, just talking) and when I couldn't told DC to get dad.

MrsTerryPratchett Sun 17-Dec-17 16:46:07

More likely to have mental illness, be on drugs, etc.

Yup. But MH issues don't make someone violent. I've worked many years at homeless shelters and when I worked lates we were far far more worried about walking to the car past drunk arseholes who wanted to sexually harrass the female shelter staff than the homeless blokes. In fact one of the drug dealers once 'saved' us from a group of pissed Lotharios who wouldn't take no for an answer.

But you never know.

CaptainChristmas Sun 17-Dec-17 16:48:20

I don’t think ywbu. What did your dh think the semi-conscious, freezing man was going to do?

Greenshoots1 Sun 17-Dec-17 16:50:03

if you would really like to help, then support this:

This is the Crisis homeless choir singing "streets of London" in n attempt for the Christmas number 1.

It costs 99p, all proceeds go to Crisis, and more importantly, getting the Christmas number 1 would have to get more attention from the government.

BornInSydneyy Sun 17-Dec-17 16:50:47

This makes me really sad- like it's ok for a homeless person to be dead

No one has said that? hmm

darkcandlelight Sun 17-Dec-17 16:52:22

Thank you green I have bought it just now smile

Frederickvonhefferneffer Sun 17-Dec-17 16:58:07

I would say teaching your child compassion for others is very responsible.

Aeroflotgirl Sun 17-Dec-17 17:00:25

Yanbu, it lovely for your dd to witness you being kind, I don't see any issue with it, you were in a public place,not secluded area.

Penfold007 Sun 17-Dec-17 17:00:53

You did a very nice thing, sadly in the great scheme of things it was just a kind gesture but a very caring one. I'm sure the man was glad that someone cared.

BulletFox Sun 17-Dec-17 17:01:41

Trust no-one, but try to be kind.

FFS a cup of tea is a cup of tea.


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