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To just give up on diets completely?

(58 Posts)
Sugarnut Thu 14-Dec-17 16:58:55

You name it, I’ve lost weight on it.

And then put all seven stone of it back on. Repeatedly.

I started my dieting decades as an extremely overweight eleven year old. After a particularly nasty bullying episode I decided I needed to be thin.

I put myself on a 700kcal a day diet after reading about it in a magazine. I managed to lose five stone, which quickly returned when I started to binge after restricting myself for so many months.

Now I’m thirty years old, have been yo-yo dieting for twenty years and am still* seven stone overweight. I cook home meals from scratch mainly, lots of fruits and veggies. But I inevitably end up massively overeating after so long on a ‘diet’

I’ve done every diet there is - simple calorie counting, soup diets, slim shakes, Atkins diet, cabbage diet, slimming world, low carb, weight watchers and many many more.

I think about food, agonise over it, every second of every day. I hate myself constantly when I eat ‘wrong’ full fat stuff and And I’ve had enough.

I completely give up. I don’t want to count anything anymore. I don’t want to keep failing and feeling like the shittest, weakest person in existence.

I’ll carry on going to the gym because I actually enjoy that.

I’m just going to try to stop obsessing about food and see what happens. Aibu?

specialsubject Thu 14-Dec-17 17:01:09

yes, diets fail as you have repeatedly proved. The evil diet industry exists because diets fail. Only lifestyle change works.

you need psychiatric help, not the scammers. And they are ALL scammers. Please get that help to see yourself as worthwhile, because you are.

VladmirsPoutine Thu 14-Dec-17 17:01:37

No. Yanbu. smile

Sugarnut Thu 14-Dec-17 17:04:01

I did go to see my gp a few times.

He’s the one that gave me the 12 week voucher for slimming world.

mrsmuggins53 Thu 14-Dec-17 17:13:03

Forget diets. Have you read or listened to podcasts by Jason fung? Mainly about fasting/eating and insulin.

PinkHeart5914 Thu 14-Dec-17 17:15:03

Diets won’t work. A lot of diets restrict you so much you do end up binging

Just eat what ever you want in small portions, exercise and see what happens? It’s always worked for me, doing this even shifted my baby weight after both dc in no time

MrsZB Thu 14-Dec-17 17:16:08

Rebelfit on Facebook is good. Very anti diet but educates about nutrition and exercise.

RunRabbitRunRabbit Thu 14-Dec-17 17:16:22

Yes, see if you can stop obsessing about food. You have probably lost touch with the messages your body sends you about what food it would like.

Misspilly88 Thu 14-Dec-17 17:16:42

Of course not. Congrats on seeing the light!

TheBiscuitStrikesBack Thu 14-Dec-17 17:18:05

Diets do not work. As you’ve proven to yourself. There’s no point in eating well for 5 days a week and then blowing it at the weekend, or in your case, eating well for 3 months and blowing it for 1.

There are no good foods and bad foods. Just food. So don’t feel guilty about what you are eating. That’s a mindset change. Think about food that is satiating. Protein rich food, keeps you fuller for longer so you don’t need a whack of carbs to go with it or reach for chocolate an hour after lunch as you’ve dipped and are hungry.

TheBiscuitStrikesBack Thu 14-Dec-17 17:19:59

Also, have a think about strength and conditioning training. This will get you lean, it takes a while. Much slower progress than ww etc but it is genuine FAT loss that allows your metabolic rate to reset.

Mrsdraper1 Thu 14-Dec-17 17:22:08

I have given up too. I have been juggling the same 3 stone for 15 years and I read a book called Secrets from the Eating Lab. The author is an academic who has been involved in lots of research and has reviewed other research. There is no diet in the book, just a few tips to do with tricking your brain into better habits, but there aren't even many of those. It's quite eye opening and very funny.
What it all boils down to is that diets don't work and you are wasting your time and money.
I just try to eat healthily ie try to get my 5 a day and try not to eat junk too often.
I'm still working on getting my head round it to be honest as it takes a while to get out of the mindset. As a pp has said you forget what things you actually like and it really warps your thinking.

jaseyraex Thu 14-Dec-17 17:25:06

Of course you are not being unreasonable! I've been where you are and it was awful. I currently follow The Body Coach plan, it's been the best lifestyle change I've ever made! The amount of food you can eat is just crazy, I'm never left feeling hungry or deprived of anything. His workouts are fab and have me fitter and stronger than I've ever been in my life. I always wanted to be skinny but I've finally realised how great it is to be healthy and strong. I've got better muscles than my DH grin If you want a permanent change rather than a faddy diet then I do thoroughly recommend The Body Coach.

Sugarnut Thu 14-Dec-17 17:25:35

Thank you, I will look into those things.

I don’t actually remember feeling ‘comfortably full’. It’s always either been still hungry or so full I’m in physical pain after a binge.

I’m trying out something new for dinner tonight.

Whereas before but it would be frylight and low fat versions of things I’m going to cook with the natural full fat things and try not to feel guilty.

I’ve just read something that describes how to listen to your own body about when to stop eating (btw does obsessively googling about ‘not dieting’ count as still obsessing about diet? 😁)

Bambamber Thu 14-Dec-17 17:35:44

You'll probably lose more weight long term by not dieting. Cook food you enjoy and don't have distractions while eating (e.g. don't sit in front of tv) and stop eating once your comfortably full. Have a glass of
water before/during dinner, it will help fill you up and being well hydrated stops your body retaining water.

quackingduck222 Thu 14-Dec-17 18:38:45

Have you considered 5:2 approach? It’s utterly amazing as you can have your cake and eat it too.

I’m a yoyo dieter and have been for 8 years. SW, WW, Herbalife, Cambridge diet, other shake based diets, low carbing.

Every single year I’ve dieted lost between 1-4 stones per year every single year and without fail have gained it all back. At the last count I’d lost 18 stones in total and gained it all back.

I have really struggled with binge eating ever since I joined slimming world, I’m not completely over it and still do occasionally but I haven’t now in 8 weeks.

I now know I WILL NEVER regain the weight again as I’m sticking to it for life.

We have a absolutely amazing group over in the 5:2 section on here, if you fancy coming over and joining us.

Absolutely no Gimmicks, no one selling us anything, no one force feeding us muller lights just eating full fat versions, enjoying our food and fasting 2 days a week. There are also other intermittent fasting versions.

peachgreen Thu 14-Dec-17 21:04:14

Sorry you're getting so many diet recommendations on this thread hmm Very unhelpful, especially to someone who clearly has a history of disordered eating.

YANBU OP. Taking a break and learning to listen to your body sounds like a really good plan. Oh, and up your water intake. We forget the difference between the signals for hungry and thirsty a lot of the time. Good luck.

Sugarnut Thu 14-Dec-17 21:46:13

I’m really happy, something completely unexpected just happened during dinner.

I mean, I know I’m not going to suddenly have a healthy relationship with food overnight but I really feel like I’ve just had a breakthrough.

I tried the technique I read about earlier. I had a few wobbles when I put my dinner it (head was screaming ‘THERE IS FULL FAY BUTTER IN THERE - ARE YOU INSANE’) but I ignored it.

I told she I wouldn’t be as chatty tonight and really concentrated on what I was eating, taste, texture etc, which by the way was so much nicer with the full fat stuff blush

About half way through I stopped for five minutes, chatted with dh and then realised that that pleasant sensation in my stomach meant I was full and I didn’t want anymore! I took one more bite to check and I definitely was full.

I know this sounds ridiculous coming from an adult, getting really excited over that, but it’s the first time I remember feeling this sensation.

I’m not hungry and I’m not in pain from eating my portion, dh’s and then the leftovers before I’ve even had chance to think about it.

It’s going to be a long road I know but I really feel like this is right for me.

(Ok blush embarrassing vent over)

Gameofgnomes Thu 14-Dec-17 22:08:21

Sugarnut I could have written your post word for word.

I'm sick of following a 'plan' being off the 'wagon' and then back on it.

I want to eat like a normal person and not have to think about it.

It's definitely disordered eating and I think I'm going to try private therapy.

Well done on your first breakthrough though. That full feeling is something I don't listen to and I know I need to.

foodiefil Thu 14-Dec-17 22:11:34

Are you in the North? Have a look at Elite 20lb challenge.

You need a lifestyle change, not a diet

dogdaydisaster Thu 14-Dec-17 22:22:58

Have a look at intuitive eating by Evelyn triboluminescent.
It outlines exactly what you’ve been expressing.

dogdaydisaster Thu 14-Dec-17 22:24:22

HA! Tribole grin

liquidrevolution Thu 14-Dec-17 22:30:51

You need rebelfit. Honestly!

My mind was blown by it this time last year.

NewPapaGuinea Thu 14-Dec-17 22:38:34

If any GP's are reading this, why do you prescribe Slimming World? The evidence is stacked against it working so I'm calling you out to explain why you put people on this sham?

Titsywoo Thu 14-Dec-17 22:41:58

Yes give up dieting. Add to your diet instead. More lean protein, more water and lots more veg. Don't worry about everything else.

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