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To send 6yo to bed ‘hungry’

(87 Posts)
Singlebutmarried Tue 12-Dec-17 20:46:55

Firstly hello all. I’ve been lurks by for a couple of weeks now and have been throughly entertained by Antique ram castrators and FTCFs.

My 6yo daughter is refusing to go to bed as she’s ‘hungry’

I’ve got to the stage where I’m fed up of her not eating all her dinner then asking for more half an hour later.

This has been going on for months.

Hubby works away mon- fri, she’s called him complaining about me and he’s now had a go says no I should just deal with it as he can’t parent from a different part of the country.

Proper peed off at the mo

Monoblock67 Tue 12-Dec-17 20:48:44

What do you do with her dinner when she refuses it? I’d leave it on the plate and when she complains about being hungry offer that up again, reheated if need be. I wouldn’t do this is if it was one off behaviour but if she’s doing it every night it does become very grating!

Bambamber Tue 12-Dec-17 20:49:28

I would personally give her 2 options: a slice of toast, or go to bed hungry. Or keep her uneaten dinner to one side so when she complains she has the option of finishing her dinner or go to bed hungry

KindergartenKop Tue 12-Dec-17 20:49:46

You are dealing with it. You cook, you serve, she chooses not to eat.

However, try to serve meals with one thing she will eat to ease your own stress levels.

Singlebutmarried Tue 12-Dec-17 20:52:03

It was her favourite food tonight as well.

It’s an ongoing battle, im pretty sure it’s because she doesn’t want to go to bed.

She’s been well fed today (as every other day)

ivykaty44 Tue 12-Dec-17 20:52:13

Your dp shouldn’t be undermining your parenting

Leave your dc to go to bed hungry and tell her to eat her dinner tomorrow

ChocolateButton15 Tue 12-Dec-17 20:53:31

I think you should follow through with no more food tonight. Maybe keep the rest of the dinner next time and re offer it when she asks half hour later. Or any food she gets if she hasnt eaten dinner is boring, slice of buttered toast or banana.

Jellycatspyjamas Tue 12-Dec-17 20:54:53

I'd keep her plate aside and when she starts saying she's hungry offer her that unless it's something I know she's really not that keen on. Generally speaking if my DC don't eat meals when offered they can have fruit as a snack but that's all that's on offer - no treats or alternative meals here.

BifsWif Tue 12-Dec-17 20:54:56

If you know she’s not actually hungry, then send her to bed.

Otherwise offer her the original meal, reheated.

Cabininthewoods69 Tue 12-Dec-17 20:55:22

My dd does this but eats all her dinner. She's 9 and now is in a habit. I'm slowly winning the battle by just fruit xx

Singlebutmarried Tue 12-Dec-17 20:55:23

Currently heating up her leftover risotto.

SomeBananasAreStillGreen Tue 12-Dec-17 20:55:50

I used to give in to this, and I used to spend all evening trotting up and down the stairs with tasty snacks. ..

Not any more. ...!

These days, it's reheated dinner, a slice of toast or nothing.

The kids soon gave up trying to control me with foodsmile

softkittywarmkitty28 Tue 12-Dec-17 20:56:15

My dd does this so I keep her meal in the microwave til she goes to bed. Then it's just warmed up if she's hungry

Solasum Tue 12-Dec-17 20:57:07

My DS isn’t a big eater and is on the skinny side so I let him have weetabix or cornflakes before bedtime to top him up if he says he is hungry, whether or not he has eaten dinner. Getting into pyjamas is the cutoff though, no food after that, and more time to eat before bed means less story time.

It is pretty demoralising cooking a meal and it being barely touched, but as pp have said, it is your job to serve food, theirs to eat it

Believeitornot Tue 12-Dec-17 20:57:41

If you’re hungry would you eat your reheated dinner?
Reheated rice is a bit dodge.

Don’t make it a big deal. Serve her smaller portions at dinner and give her a bedtime milk and snack.

mumonashoestring Tue 12-Dec-17 20:58:08

DS (5) gets directed to the fruit bowl if he's mithering for food after dinner. If he doesn't want an apple then he's trying it on.

(Disclaimer: I'm well aware that some children will go hungry rather than eat fruit due to sensory issues or similar - DS isn't one of them. He's just a toerag grin )

Hiphopopotamus Tue 12-Dec-17 20:58:16

How has your six year old daughter been able to call your husband without you knowing or checking?

cardibach Tue 12-Dec-17 20:59:55

ChocolateButton your suggestion wouldn’t work for me - I bloody love buttered toast and banana!
OP if you know she isn’t hungry, send her to bed.

Chilver Tue 12-Dec-17 21:01:53

We have this all the time. Not necessarily to not go to bed but about half an hr after every meal 'i'm hungry'.. drives me bonkers!

Before bed, if she was offered more food at meal time and didn't want anymore then, she gets a choice of a glass of milk or nothing. She normally drinks the milk with a grump but goes to bed then.

Love51 Tue 12-Dec-17 21:02:04

If they have been given edible food and refused, they can go to bed hungry. I don't adhere to this with my youngest as he will then wake us all up at 5am because he is actually hungry. So I insist he eats up, and offer crackers or toast or similar ( he doesn't get a choice!) If he tries and then genuinely dislikes his dinner.
If her dad is free to take a phone call, he can parent internationally. It's the absolute bare minimum of parenting, which is why he must try his hardest and manage it.

formerbabe Tue 12-Dec-17 21:02:58

If you’re hungry would you eat your reheated dinner?

Yes of course.

softkittywarmkitty28 Tue 12-Dec-17 21:05:07

believe depends what was left.
I would get dd to eat her leftovers mostly unless it was just little bits.
But cold sausage, pasta, rice, chicken, re heated curry etc would all be fine to eat.

Believeitornot Tue 12-Dec-17 21:08:29

I wouldn’t....

But I don’t serve up big portions for myself or the dcs because experience teaches me that a) it doesn’t always get eaten and b) there’s no reason to clear your plate unless you’re genuinely hungry and that’s very difficult to predict.

Better to under serve and have a snack later than try and predict exact portion sizes and have a battle later.

Raver84 Tue 12-Dec-17 21:11:11

If she's doing this all the time why not just feed her once bit later so if she isn't hungry at say 5 but is at say 6 make dinner 6. Pudding or fruit whatever after then if still hungry toast or cereal before bed .

glitterlips1 Tue 12-Dec-17 21:11:55

I usually let my children have something like toast. I don't like them going to bed feeling hungry and I wouldn't reheat their dinner because I wouldn't do that myself. I would try to determine why she isn't eating her dinner and get to the root of that.

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