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I don't like the tree

(140 Posts)
inniu Thu 07-Dec-17 08:47:52

Most years we go together as a family to pick the tree. This year DH suggested as we had a few things on and he had sometime off work he would get it himself.

I don't like it at all. It is slightly shorter but much much narrower than any tree we have ever had. When it was delivered my reaction wasn't great. I looked at it and said "it is very small"
DH is taking it very personally and was very upset with me which I was really surprised about. We have made up since but I still don't like the tree.

For context, I work part time and do 95% of the Christmas organising so I may be used to doing things a certain way.

I really still want to get another tree. AIBU

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Thu 07-Dec-17 08:49:21

Tbh OP, YABU. It's only a tree, it'll only be up for a couple of weeks.

Zadig Thu 07-Dec-17 08:49:57

Could you ring the place he got it from and ask to change it? Do it while DH is out / at work and he probably won't notice.

AChickenCalledKorma Thu 07-Dec-17 08:51:11

Getting another tree would send a pretty clear message that what the tree looks like is more important that your DHs feelings. Get used to the tree he chose.

BarbarianMum Thu 07-Dec-17 08:51:14

Maybe stop being ridiculous and get over it? If you have to be so much "in charge" that you can't even let your dh do the tree for one Christmas you are the problem.

Poshindevon Thu 07-Dec-17 08:52:46

You like to control things thats obvious. Its a tree that will be gone soon. Decorate the tree nicely and get over it

deepestdarkestperu Thu 07-Dec-17 08:58:02

Oh come on, really? Does it matter? Just decorate it and forget about it - it's only up for a few weeks!

Temporary2002 Thu 07-Dec-17 09:02:31

It will be beautiful if you decorate it.fsmile Load it up! That's what I do. Returning it would not make your husband feel very good. At least it's real.

inniu Thu 07-Dec-17 09:06:34

I guess I already knew the answer. I will have to get over it.
We definitely will not be able to put all our decorations on but hopefully will fit the sentimental ones on.

GiveMeTheTeaAndNobodyGetsHurt Thu 07-Dec-17 09:07:57

Sorry, I think you're being a bit of a control freak here; it is just a tree, it'll be up for a few weeks. Insisting on a 'better' tree or acting down about it not being good enough will just send the message that you don't trust your DH to get things right without your help, which is frankly extremely condescending.

TheCatsPaws Thu 07-Dec-17 09:09:28

What the? It’s a tree. Pretty minor issue OP.

Frederickvonhefferneffer Thu 07-Dec-17 09:09:53

Yabu. It’s only a tree. You are undermining your DH with your reaction.

OpalTree Thu 07-Dec-17 09:11:26

I wouldn't swap it as it would be giving your dh the message that only what you like matters not what he liked.

TheEyesDontHaveIt Thu 07-Dec-17 09:12:14

Have you also said "it's very small" to your DH about something else?

Trees are more expensive this year. I bought our free from the same place for the same price as previous Christmasses and this year the free is a foot shorter. If I'd wanted to get the same size free then I would ha a bad to ha a paid an extra £10 for it.

Ecureuil Thu 07-Dec-17 09:13:53

Ah I get the disappointment, but it’s a tree. It’ll be up for a few weeks and then it’ll be fire wood. I know my DH would be upset if I was acting down over the tree he picked.

GreatDuckCookery Thu 07-Dec-17 09:15:46

Have to admit that I am fussy about the Christmas tree and after DH brought a ridiculously small one home a few years ago, I go and buy it myself now. The room it goes in is huge and it can take a really big tree but he came home with one about 3 foot tall! I put it in the play room and went and bought another one.

TheMaddHugger Thu 07-Dec-17 09:17:16

FFS its just a tree

Why are your feeling more important than his ?

BikeRunSki Thu 07-Dec-17 09:17:54

Even if you keep itup til 12th night,it’ll be up for a month at most. It’s a tree, it very temporary. Leave it be and accept your DH’s help and taste.

Frederickvonhefferneffer Thu 07-Dec-17 09:19:12

😂 mad hugger! 😂

FlouncyDoves Thu 07-Dec-17 09:19:37

I get where you’re coming from OP. The tree is really important and a shit small one is disappointing.

We’re not having one this year as we’re moving, going on holiday and then spending Xmas away from home. I feel a bit sad about it.

GreatDuckCookery Thu 07-Dec-17 09:21:15

No hugs then MadHugger? What’s going on?? grin

TheClaws Thu 07-Dec-17 09:21:18

Poor little, not good enough tree grin (Sorry, OP, but I do feel a little sorry for the tree too...)

outabout Thu 07-Dec-17 09:22:39

Try explaining your rationale to the millions around the world who will have no FOOD over this Christmas, of which a significant number will die.
Not to mention the environmental impact of growing trees to be a decoration for a few weeks then disposed of.

TheMaddHugger Thu 07-Dec-17 09:23:11

I know claws That poor little tree just wants love and happiness and Nope OP shat on it. Poor Little tree.

(((((((((((Hugs))))))))))) The Little Tree

TheMaddHugger Thu 07-Dec-17 09:23:56

Dammit I've become a 'treeHugger' OP Look what you've gone and done

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