To feel sad for DS(3 Posts)
DS (8) has been rather quiet and withdrawn past few weeks. He eventually told me his (only) two friends have fallen out with him. Main boy -whom he was closest to - is now isolating him at playtime as well as during class. He is also calling him names like speccy four eyes which upsets DS a lot.
A bit of background, we moved across the country roughly a year a go, DS has anxiety (undiagnosed but has physical tics, extreme worry over the daftest things etc) and is incredibly sensitive. He started his current school in September though he knew the boys from last year when they were in the feeder infant school. He really, really struggled initially being the new kid and shy and quiet, but the Infant school headteacher was great and tackled the bullying effectively. This academic year DS was very happy the mean boys mostly left him alone and he'd made a couple of friends. However he is unaware what triggered them turning on him so suddenly and is devastated to be all alone again. He told me nobody will play with him, they tell him to get lost so he wanders around the playground by himself
Now I know, I need to speak to the teacher about the name calling (he's just told me he was called an ugly gay too), and the deliberate isolation. but from what another mum was saying today, (whose son was badly bullied and changing schools soon due to relocation), the school is pretty crap at dealing with such issues and staff are in denial.
I'm not the most confident person but want to come across how I feel when I speak to the teacher tomorrow - that I will not tolerate this behaviour and won't be fobbed off. I know it is mild compared to what some poor children face but I cannot bear seeing DS so sad and when he is like this his tics worsen. I don't understand why (I got the vibe and also from speaking to other mums) there is so much cliqueness and nastiness amongst a lot of children at this particular school.
I want to also address why the playground staff do not initiate games to include children who seem to have no friends.
What else would be good to bring up?
I'm so sorry your son is so upset
Definitely speak to the teacher 're the name calling/leaving out - maybe see if she can buddy him up with another child.
She may also be able to speak to the playground staff about keeping an eye out for him.
It's awful when there are friendship issues.
Maybe the teacher could sit your Ds with boys he likes in the class room. This may encourage friendship which may carry on to the playground. Some boys like playing only football during their break times which he may not enjoy. Maybe the teacher could sit your Ds with gentle boys who are like your Ds.
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