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To be a bit envious of friends labour? *lighthearted*

(45 Posts)
FGSholdthedoor Wed 06-Dec-17 14:38:15

Me and DF have been discussing the lovely post childbirth stuff as she has just given birth to her little baby.
She said she has a teeny scrape and apart from that no stitches, no tears, nothing, nada. It doesn't even sting when she goes for a wee! shock
She's up and about and not wobbling like I was for weeks a penguin and generally has no issue whatsoever "down there".

Is this even normal/possible? Her baby was 8lbs so not exactly teeny either!
I vividly remember the pain and dread I felt for weeks if not months post my LO everytime I needed the loo (TMI - turned out to be undiagnosed fissures).

AIBU to feel a bit jealous?

NoWittyNamesAvailable Wed 06-Dec-17 14:46:01

I had a small scrape, no stitches etc and was up and out shopping the day after ds1 was born. It was also very quick and recorded as 55 minutes, it did sting a bit when i had a wee though. Ds2 how ever was completely different 6 weeks prem and emcs, i long for an easy one again this time around with number 3. I'm always envious of people people that have easy pregnancies.

toolonglurking Wed 06-Dec-17 14:49:37

My labour sounds really similar to your friend, even through I was induced, it was all fine. A small abrasion, I got one stitch, and was out walking the dog the next day - and all I'd heard in the run up was nightmare stories!!
I'm now pregnant with number two, but still pretty anxious about labour this time round. Surely I can't be that lucky twice!!

EdmundCleverClogs Wed 06-Dec-17 14:52:23

Ah that was pretty much my experience, bar the small tear that made the first pee burn like hell. Otherwise I was pretty much fine on my feet. Until a few weeks later where I had weeks of postnatal thrush to make up for it. That was not fun.

About to have my second, will probably be ripped to shreds next time.

PinkHeart5914 Wed 06-Dec-17 14:53:18

Yes it’s possible! And of course yanbu to feel a little jealous

Unfortunately my first pregnancy was a stillbirth and some what traumatic but I’ve had 2 dc since and the births weren’t awfully long ( 1 @ 4 hours, 1 @ 65 minutes) i wouldn’t even say the pain was unbearable I could handle it, I had no stiches, no tears etc and I was up and about the next day! I am expecting another baby on the 28th Of December and am hoping for another straight forward easy birth

Sallystyle Wed 06-Dec-17 14:54:01

I have had 5 babies.

The first was a ventouse birth and it hurt after. I had to pour a jug over water over my vulva whist I peed to take away the pain. I didn't tear, I just had grazing and I was still up straight away.

My other 4 labours were all around an hour long. I go from not dilated to pushing extremely quickly. Up straight away and home in 4 hours. No tears or stitches ever.

If it is any consolation my pregnancies were horrible and I had hyperemesis in two pregnancies and I was as sick as a dog with the other three. I suffered a lot of back problems, constant thrush and I mean constant and many UTIs etc.

HelenaJustina Wed 06-Dec-17 14:55:29

Definitely possible! And to reassure toolong can even happen more than once! I didn’t have stitches/tears with any of my four... I was up and about doing school runs the day after etc. Probably too much really!

Sallystyle Wed 06-Dec-17 14:59:18

I was up and about doing school runs the day after etc. Probably too much really!

Me too. I felt completely normal down there (with the exception of my first and that wasn't awful) and had no pain when walking etc. I kept being told to rest but I was physically fine and wanted to get out.

And yes, with five births and no tears and stitches you most certainly can be lucky more than once.

DingleBerries Wed 06-Dec-17 15:01:04

It’s weird isn’t it?

My 8lb 14oz baby gave me a tiny scrape and I was in agonising pain when I weed.

Yet my 9lb 6oz second baby caused a cut and stitches yet I was up walking and weeing with no pain at all!

EdmundCleverClogs Wed 06-Dec-17 15:02:44

Oh, I would add I had a water bith. Have no idea if it did help or not, but I like to think it made things a bit easier. There was no huge intervention, no telling me when to push, it was all quite hands off and very much took it in our own time. Obviously a lot of it is just how it goes at the time, but the little things did help.

bananamonkey Wed 06-Dec-17 15:03:22

Same, I had no stitches or tears, 6 lb 13 oz baby but only 25th centile head circumference. Also I had a water birth which apparently helps with tearing. I did have a lot of bruising but my friend couldn’t believe I was sitting down without wincing a few days later, she had a much rougher time. I felt fine, just knackered!

Hoping next time will be the same but I think it’s luck of the draw!

elliejjtiny Wed 06-Dec-17 15:03:43

My oldest 3 children were born like that. It was great and I felt fine apart from the sleep deprivation and hormones. My youngest 2 I had nightmare births though.

PoncyCanapes Wed 06-Dec-17 15:05:24

Yes, it's possible. Although I'd say less common than a bit of pain and trauma wink

My best friend had three babies, each 18 months apart.
Each time she was in the birthing centre for about 45 minutes before she gave birth. No intervention/pain relief (described the pain as like 'bad period pain'). No birth injuries or stitches. Breastfed easily immediately and was back in her size 10 jeans within a fortnight. She gave birth to her youngest on 22nd Dec and was in a sparkly dress cooking Christmas Dinner on the 25th.

If you reverse everything I've just said - that was me! It was all pain, gore, trauma and tears.

I call her my Evil Birth Twin grin.

TheWhyteRoseShallRiseAgain Wed 06-Dec-17 15:09:49

Hmmm I’m jealous too —joke ish— dd1 was emcs preemie and although only 3lb 4 I had complications after for over 6 months, dts I lost in second trimester and almost didn’t make it myself with the haemorrhage, dd2 although reasonably quick was a 3rd degree tear (6lb 13 but seemed to be all head) and “the fear” of the loo lasted weeks!

Dinosauratemydaffodils Wed 06-Dec-17 15:10:11

My tiny Grandmama had 5 11-12 pound babies with no grazes/tears or anything. No idea how given she's a bird sized 5'1 with tiny tiny bones. There is a picture of her holding one of my Uncles as a newborn and he looks just like a giant Chucky doll.

That said, I had an emcs with DS and could walk to NICU at the other end of the hospital absolutely fine within 24 hours and refused all pain killers because I didn't need them. Was shoving a trolley around Costco on the way home from hospital on day 4. The poor anesthetist from my section thought he'd done something terrible to my nerves or massively overdosed me when he met me wandering down the corridor a day later.

My experience of a section bears no resemblance to that of any one else I know.

juddyrockingcloggs Wed 06-Dec-17 15:10:30

My boy was 9lb 7oz! I was up and about straight away, no problemo. Felt like Wonder Woman.

I was very smug.

However, I am now 2 months in to a 3 month wait for vaginal mesh surgery on my uterine and bladder prolapse.

Now that my fanny is dropping out I am no longer smug. Your friend may regret the time she thought she'd got away with Labour Scot free!

rabbitsdontlayeggs Wed 06-Dec-17 15:11:02

YANBU at all. I am so envious of people of had nice (you know what I mean) labours and recoveries after my 9lber took 3 long days to arrive, with that bastard drip, back to back labour, epidural, severe shoulder dystocia, episiotomy, 3 sets of forceps, surgical placenta removal, PPH and more tears and stitches than I care to think of!

Elective section for me next time, please and thanks!

It's all luck of the draw. For everyone that has a rough time there's another who has a good one even with things like inductions. Mine was horrible, but I know lots of people who haven't found them to be. There's no way if predicting it or preventing it, just got to go with it and hope you get lucky!

Katedotness1963 Wed 06-Dec-17 15:12:40

Both my labours were quick and easy, no time for pain relief and I felt fecking fantastic afterwards, I could have run a marathon...which is surprising because normally I don't like to walk to the shops...

BluePlasticBuddha Wed 06-Dec-17 15:14:55

Only be envious if she is boasting and/or suggesting that your different experience was somehow your fault.{DCousin I am looking at you].

Otherwise, are you okay?Have the fissures healed? If not,please see someone. I had a very bad tear and pph and will have to have corrective surgery in the new year. 8 years after that birth and we still can't really have sex. ( my issues and fear of the pain mostly). I agree I feel alot of envy at people who have had it easier.... but I am working on it.

Childbirth sucks really.

HandsOffMyChocolate Wed 06-Dec-17 15:24:02

YANBU I virtually turned green with envy at my cousin's labours, but mostly the one immediately following my oxytocin induced marathon that ended in emergency section.

There I was 7 weeks later still feeling like a terrible street fighter who loses and should just quit and dressing in all sorts of odd combos when she calls my mother to say the baby has arrived and we can go meet her.

We arrive at the house expecting the baby to be a day old at least but no, the midwife is still there completing paperwork! She had literally just given birth in the living room and because she felt fine called all family to let them meet baby straight away so they could cocoon for a few days as a new family.

She was making Sunday dinner when labour started, as giving birth only took 20 minutes she was finishing off when we arrived. Apparently it stung a little it but then her baby arrived, placenta was delivered, she cleaned herself up and called us.

The midwife wasn't phased at all because that's how my cousin has babies. I swear she was born to carry children (eventually had 7 of them so clearly it suits her).

Anytime someone asks to here about my labour because they're expecting I'm honest but balance it with my cousin's. It's encouraging to know there are truly beautiful experiences out there, I'm just jealous that I didn't get to have one with my labours.

HandsOffMyChocolate Wed 06-Dec-17 15:25:25

Here = hear...sorry blush

LivLemler Wed 06-Dec-17 15:36:37

23 weeks with my first and avidly reading all the good stories and studiously ignoring the bad ones grin

BluePlasticBuddha Wed 06-Dec-17 15:38:19

liv it's a cliche because it's is all worth it. Having a child is just the most extraordinary joy.

Very good luck and

juddyrockingcloggs Wed 06-Dec-17 15:51:24

Ah good luck liv

My birth was beautiful! A very relaxed, induction in hospital at 37 weeks! I usually swear like a trooper and my husband says the only time I didn't swear was when I gave birth which is a miracle in itself!

I hope you have a cracking, calm and relaxed birth!

toolonglurking Wed 06-Dec-17 16:11:05

My goodness I'm loving this thread, it's quite rare to hear to many positive stories in one place! Thank you OP for starting it.

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